-doing my anxiety goal. today was hard,because weather was cold and gloomy which always makes it harder for me for some reason and also best friend is ignoring me which has me on edge. i felt paranoias this time,but i accomplished the goal and i know i'm better for it. what makes me sad,is my decision to do this in the first place isn't from a place of love,but a place of pain.i feel it's the right thing regardless,but i feel if it came from a place of love,i'd feel all the more powerful
-coffee and red donut
-having support from best friend's parents during this difficult time
-doing a powerful EFT session yesterday that uncovered a lot of limiting things i had been saying and thinking for years in regards to current drama that i cleared up. also praying and having tears stream down my face during this session
-doing a speaking affirmations session without a list and in the mirror. wow,it was so powerful. i forgot how powerful mirror technique was. it cleaned up my vibe quite a bit and i am now going to go back to that regularly. there is just something about that technique that is very powerful. i had been doing affirmations without a mirror the last few weeks. when i first started last night,i felt awkward but then i became amazed at my beauty. the power of the mirror technique is incredible.
-my beautiful perfect skin
-my perfect amazing mouth
-my gorgeous model thick hair
-sweaters
-being on a normal sleep schedule now
-emails with S
-the strange,calm surrender feeling that came to me last night after a fight with best friend(and this is and has been all his own doing) and after his dad left. it all started to become so clear to me that all that's been going on was because of my anxiety issue,to overcome it. and,i had kind of known this,too on some level,that's why i had kept repeating it out loud,that's the true source of my panic attacks and the emotional drama...i think this all was to have me overcome my anxiety issue because of an intention i had set. Nothing bad was meant to happen. And,somehow in the 3 weeks or so,it all suddenly feels so do-able,and as if i am over it. I know i'm not yet. and,this year will be dedicating to truly overcoming it and i may make an outline/plan even,however,it just feels like it's already done in my mind's eye now. i feel like this chapter is finally over now,and like i finally get it. all the pieces piece together as being about this. this was one of those things i thought i'd never overcome,but really wanted to manifest..and there's been things i wanted to manifest before but thought with dread i may never,but then did.
-getting bedroom halfway cleaned
-the book i had been reading the last few weeks which has played a part in me feeling i can finally do this
-being patient with best friend ignoring me right now and treating me bad
-my eyeglasses
-forums like this and loa forum that really help me get back on track when i fall off
-being peace
-trusting my heart
-getting more feelings of normalness of just feeling the memory of it