Something sitting on my chest, false awakenings... bah!

this morning, after an exhausting 3 days at work, getting very little sleep each night and working physically very hard, i had to get up early to do a final break-down of some equipment at a venue near my house. by the end of it i was so tired, i decided to go back home for a nap, before going back into work this afternoon.

during my short time back in bed, i had this experience...
i was drifting into sleep, when i felt something invisible climb onto the bed, and sit on my chest. it wasn't very heavy, but it seemed to have most of it's weight on my wrists, so i couldn't push it off.
in my mind i told it to "get off!" and it seemed to.
i woke up, and could hear the radio, there was some interview going on, a male presenter was interviewing another male.
i went back to sleep, and again the same sensation, something getting up onto my chest, and this time i felt little steps further down the bed, by my legs. like a cat. it walked down by my feet and seemed to settle, just like my cat would.
now i started to get a little concerned. what is this thing on my chest?i tried to push it up with my hands, but again, it had my wrists secured.
i wriggled my fingers, and this movement was enough, with a little will power, to allow me to wake up again.
again i heard the chat on the radion, and the interviewer ended it with "thanks for you insightful input Ourorobos" :shock:
i thought, "wait a minute! Ourorobos?? that's someone from AstralDynamics!"
then a moment later. i had the realization that i don't have a radio in my room!!
"false awakening!!" i thought, and then managed to open my eyes, and was actually awake this time.

again i drifted back towards sleep, and again i found myself lying there, feeling this thing get up onto my chest, and again, the cat at the bottom of the bed.
this was getting annoying!
again i managed to free my fingers, wiggle them enough for the movement to "wake" me... into another false awakening.
i grabbed a tea cup from the shelf beside my bed, holding it in my hands, a plan now forming in my mind.
i allowed myself to fall back under, and of course the thing was there again.
this time i asked it to show itself to me.
i saw a face, which seemed to look like a human male, with a thin mustache, kinda looked like the V for Vendetta masks.
this head was floating in the space where the weight was concentrated, i wiggled my fingers a bit and managed to get my hands out from underneath, but instead of trying to wake up, i caught the little floating head in the tea cup, and got my other hand and covered it over, like i was catching a spider or something.
it seemed to work. i groggily got out of my bed and put the whole thing, cup and all, into the bin. it was really difficult to move, my limbs reacting slowly, but i got there in the end.
as i threw it into the bin, i woke up, for real.

Neil, you know these experiences are really common right? I still wonder exactly why they happen. I know Robert Monroe experienced such things and even perceived them as cats at some time. I have friends who have had similar episodes and I have as well. Some theorise that these episodes yield information if interpreted metaphorically, for instance, something sitting on your chest as something emotionally suffocating occurring in your life. Kurt Leland classifies these experiences in one of his books but a former student (I'm a teacher) has my copy so I can't quote for you right now. Maybe Oliver can help there.

The radio noise is common too. Monroe called it M band noise and considered it the emotions and thoughts of collective humanity. I think material from our own subconscious can get mixed up in it too.

Anyway, I hope this doesn't become too common an occurrence for you. I'm at a stage where such visitors invariably diminish the experience for me so that I'm essentially struggling with them rather than getting on with more interesting adventures. I suspect that this will pass once I re-develop presence of mind and composure in my waking life so that the quality of my lucid dreams and projections improves again. Whether or not they're thought forms and to be interpreted metaphorically, they seem a relatively harmless, though annoying, phase that many projectors pass through on the way to proficiency.

Okay, as per request! :)

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Originally Posted by Kurt Leland

What was it all about? I believe that the dream from which this experience developed had gotten me in touch with my feelings of betrayal. These feelings took the form of a dog because dogs can be blindly loyal, at times even self-destructively so, to their masters. That's how I'd been toward the friend I'd felt betrayed by. This was "something I wanted to get off my chest" - which was why the dog-like Creature sat so oppressively on that part of my body.

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(Kurt Leland, "The Unanswered Question")

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Originally Posted by Kurt Leland

I've also run across beings who are not really beings at all, but the nightmarish creations of my own negative emotions, such as fear or anger. These Creatures, as I call them, are produced whenever I bring such feelings with me into nonphysical reality , where my thoughts more less instantly create my experience.

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(Kurt Leland, "The Unanswered Question")

So, Neil, what is it in real life that "pins you down"? ;)

Oliver

Beekeeper, yeah, i know they're quite common. i'm actually surprised i didn't make the connection with the radio and Monroe's M-Band noise, as i've quite recently just finished Ultimate Journey.. :roll:

i had kinda put it down to being some sort of dreamstate initiation/test. in my sleep earlier in the morning i had had one of those, which i had failed apparently, so i thought, with the repetitive nature of this experience, maybe i was being given another opportunity to work out a solution to something.

Oliver, "what pins me down?" is just the right question to ask.
over the weekend i allowed myself to let an old habit into my life. it was a conscious decision, and i know it's not going to re-establish itself within my daily/weekly routine. i have much better control of myself now, but it seems very fair to assume that on a sub-conscious level, i may very well be disappointed with myself, and feel that maybe it still has me pinned down to some extent... thus manifesting this experience.

one thing i can say is, i knew at the time that i was manifesting it myself. even tho it felt like i was being attacked by some other being, it reacted exactly the way my thoughts dictated.
isn't it strange that you create a situation for yourself, where you feel fear?
how can one feel fear, of themselves?

actually, now that i'm thinking about it, i would be correct to feel fear of slipping back under the control of old habits that had me in a cyclic downward spiral for so many years...

thanks for the replies folks. :)

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Originally Posted by Neil Templar

one thing i can say is, i knew at the time that i was manifesting it myself. even tho it felt like i was being attacked by some other being, it reacted exactly the way my thoughts dictated.
isn't it strange that you create a situation for yourself, where you feel fear?
how can one feel fear, of themselves?

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Most fearsome situations just exist in the mind anyway. When we see things that aren't there, like seeing the shadow of a fearsome animal where there is only a bush at night, we project something outward from our mind. In real life this only happens sometimes...

Many people are afraid of their feelings, who they "really turn out to be", of the soul/Higher Self and of judgement... We're too alienated from ourselves to be truly at comfort with ourselves. That's why we sometimes create thoughtforms that seem like strangers to us. Most of our dream characters are aspects of our own mind, too, and we never identify them as such.

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Originally Posted by Neil Templar

actually, now that i'm thinking about it, i would be correct to feel fear of slipping back under the control of old habits that had me in a cyclic downward spiral for so many years...

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Habits don't come out of nowhere, nor does their intensity. They are fueled by tensions within ourselves, by the need to release or act out something, even through a crutch. Some people smoke, or occupy themselves with computer games, or snack incessantly because it brings temporarily relief - indirectly also for the underlying cause. And because the habit itself does not solve the underlying cause, they continue instead of kicking the habit, IMO.

You, on the other hand, have surely grown since when the habits had you "in their clutches". Their power over you has surely diminished. Healing yourself can lead to kicking the habit. I'm still sure you're not going back on the downward spiral. :)

Take care,
Oliver

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Originally Posted by Korpo

You, on the other hand, have surely grown since when the habits had you "in their clutches". Their power over you has surely diminished. Healing yourself can lead to kicking the habit. I'm still sure you're not going back on the downward spiral. :)

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indeed.
onwards and upwards... forward is the only way to go for me... :D

cheers!

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Originally Posted by Neil Templar

again i heard the chat on the radion, and the interviewer ended it with "thanks for you insightful input Ourorobos" :shock:
i thought, "wait a minute! Ourorobos?? that's someone from AstralDynamics!"
then a moment later. i had the realization that i don't have a radio in my room!!
"false awakening!!" i thought, and then managed to open my eyes, and was actually awake this time.

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Whoa o.o

I've become an M band celebrity! *preens* :P In all seriousness though, that's very fascinating to me. The whole experience was, really. You seemed to handle it pretty well though. :)

And because of this thread I experienced this last night:

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Heard astral talk. Realised it was Mum, J and me commentating some kind of TV show. My voice morphed out of Mum’s and I realised that both voices are on close on a continuum of voices. I’ve always recognised this with J’s voice but not Mum’s.

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The insight into my voice's similarity to my mother's was different. She has a totally different accent to me so to hear her voice become mine was kind of fascinating in a way I can't convey.

Thanks, Oliver. I knew I could count on you.

Ouroboros, can I have your autograph? :wink:

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Originally Posted by Beekeeper

Ouroboros, can I have your autograph? :wink:

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Only if you split the profits from selling it on ebay. ;)

So, how much do you think it's worth? :D