A few things come to mind:
1. Are you sure you're not capable of creating something so miserable? If not, why is that? Because your conscious imagination can't imagine it? Just how well do you know your subconscious?
Just think on that for a moment. I'm not saying your negs are definitely your projections, I'm not that smart. But I'm betting they are made up of a lot more of your energy than you're aware of at this point in the game. Keep in mind that, just as women have the power to give birth to other physical beings who, in time, go on to take on identities of their own, so we have the ability to spawn thought entities and forms that well...do the very same thing.
So search again. I'm not trying to be patronizing. I lived for many years with some very real, very frightening hauntings. And I did all I could to keep the horror at bay, but in the final analysis, the only thing that worked was very thorough, very honest introspection on the flag I was raising that attracted the entitie(s). They weren't randomly picking on me, at least not by the end of it all. Perhaps it started as such, but it seldom continues as such.
2. It sounds like you've been spending considerable time trying to use external stuff to fix a deeply internal issue. My experience has been that that's largely useless. Again, that's MY experience. You can throw holy water on a demon all you like and it will wet itself laughing at you UNLESS there's an inner state within you, an inner conviction and faith that what you're doing is backed by pure love and light. I could tell you some stories, my friend. But there's little point in that.
3. We could speculate on lots of things here, but you've got a real issue going and need help. So, send me an email here and I'll arrange to send you the books I think will help--on the house. Sound fair? I'll buy them on Amazon and have them shipped to you on the condition that you really read through carefully and set aside what you think is happening.
Take care,
Soul
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