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Thread: New to Spirituality, need guidance

  1. New to Spirituality, need guidance

    Let me say first my life has been really mundane. I've NEVER had any kind of magical, unexplained or spiritual experiences in my entire life. Never saw ghosts as a child, nothing. I have however always been fascinated by the paranormal and study it as a hobby since i was young and such and kept a open mind. I've even gone on ghost hunts just to try to find some kind of experience even as others around me have and I never did. So most all of my life I've been a atheist and indeed became a scientist as it seemed natural to gravitate to things I could actually see and experience. No offense to anyone, but due to my inability to see beyond the normal no matter how much I wanted to, I started thinking that the reason is because other people somehow deluded themselves and with the power of the mind hallucinate these things.

    Then this year happened. I dont know how to explain it, but it started with the sense that I've explored this physical world to the fullest and all its mysteries where gone. So I started studying alternative ideas like Ancient Alien theory and buddism etc. I also started getting sick alot, mysteries allergies that'd appear day and night and my mind would race with various thoughts that i couldnt control and made it difficult to sleep. So a friend reccomended meditation, and right on my first try I started getting crazy vibration sensations and electrical feelings on my body but it felt good not bad, I even experienced a vision? Of a vortex and a black sky with stars. This was all on my first try meditating. My next session also saw strange things like a red vortex and what felt like my heart beating the fastest its ever beaten in my life but it felt like it was in the center of my chest, not my breast. In addition my pulse felt normal, and it did not seem like it was my heart that was beating like that. I had no way to explain it, and between the vibrations that where crazy strong at the time I was forced to accept it as a sign. I stoped meditating for a few days after to process these experiences and ultimately decided I would embrace it and accept it good or ill. I also had a OBE during this time, i saw my body on my bed and walked out my window and up and down my street but my mind was fully awake.

    So since then nothing strange has happened during meditation and no more OBEs but I just feel so wrong and lost since then, like I need to be somewhere but Im not and dont know how to get there. I dont know where to go from here, all I know is that Im ready, and I want to feel apart of something larger then me. I want my mind and spirit to feel at peace but there is so much turmoil and confusion. This has never happened to me before and it makes me want to seclude myself from people, and alot of the time now.

    I've been searching for some advice or at least alittle help but thus far have not been able to find any.

  2. #2
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    Re: New to Spirituality, need guidance

    Hello, LenaNight.

    Your description sounds a lot like "heart chakra racing" described elsewhere on this site, for example in AD-Pedia. A good double-check is for example to check your physical pulse if it matches your experience - if you ever were actually concerned about this.

    Meditation is a good practice to keep up, simply to "keep the house in order." I had strange experiences within meditation and without, and I didn't meditate for that purpose. Most of the time, meditation didn't produce strange experiences and sensations.

    What experiences are you looking for? Specifically OBEs?
    Looking for assistance in sorting things out in your life? My intuitive friend Robyn can help. http://intuitivebalance.weebly.com/

    My blog: http://www.astraldynamics.com.au/blog.php?1595-Korpo

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    Re: New to Spirituality, need guidance

    Hi Lena.
    on my first try I started getting crazy vibration sensations and electrical feelings on my body but it felt good not bad, I even experienced a vision? Of a vortex and a black sky with stars.
    This is something that is not out of the ordinary for meditators or AP practitioners- it's called 'the void'. As Korpo said, these vibrations and electric feelings are common when first being at the liminal state, right before projection. It sounds like you went into a deep trance and experienced them.
    So since then nothing strange has happened during meditation and no more OBEs but I just feel so wrong and lost since then, like I need to be somewhere but Im not and dont know how to get there.
    It seems like you want to explore further 'out' (or 'in', depending on your outlook). Keep meditating, and keep trying to get deeper without falling asleep- the OBE Research and Discussion subforum has lots of stickied threads with techniques for trance induction and other things.
    Welcome to the forums, btw.
    AD Pedia:http://www.astraldynamics.com.au/sho...abetical-Order
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    "Stop acting as if life is a rehearsal" Dr. Wayne Dyer.

  4. Re: New to Spirituality, need guidance

    Thanks for the welcomes!

    As for what Im looking for, at the most basic level I'd like to feel at one with myself, like im apart of this greater thing out there. But what I'd want more then anything is more AP/OBE experiences, but in addition to that, I want to be able to see the world as it is. I mean I *see* the world as it really is, Im not deaf to the corruption and the shift in evil taking charge and leading to some great event coming. I can feel those things, I can even feel people after a short time of talking to them. I use to write it off as Sherlock Holmes style intuition but now I know its something more then just that.

    So I want to develop that, let me be clear though I have studied otherworldly things since I was young, I've watched the ghost hunting TV Shows, etc. I know for some its not easy seeing ghosts or feeling the presence otherworldly beings, but I know in my heart I can handle it. I'd not had a nightmare since I was a child, and when I say that I mean I've seen and heard demons in my dreams over the years but I've not been afraid, I'd tell them to stfu and go away and just saw them as annoyances and this was both in regular dreams and lucid dreams.

    Will I ever reach my spiritual goals? I hope so, but I dont know how, all I do know is I am ready to do whatever it takes to get rid of this lost feeling and finally start feeling good rather then alone in the cosmic sense.

    I will add, some of my friends have advised me to seek help with this, as they are worried I'll get in alot of trouble if I keep mucking around with Ouija boards and calling out to the spirit world without protection. But I dont really know what else to do, I understand its dangerous to do those things but inaction is not something I've been good at, waiting for something to just happen, so I knowingly accepted the risks of those actions.

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    Re: New to Spirituality, need guidance

    will add, some of my friends have advised me to seek help with this, as they are worried I'll get in alot of trouble if I keep mucking around with Ouija boards and calling out to the spirit world without protection.
    Frankly, I'd leave the Quija alone.
    But I reiterate, combine meditation with affirmations to start, and we can help with some sort of tech for AP if this is where you want to take it.
    Meditate, meditate, meditate.
    AD Pedia:http://www.astraldynamics.com.au/sho...abetical-Order
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    "Stop acting as if life is a rehearsal" Dr. Wayne Dyer.

  6. Re: New to Spirituality, need guidance

    I've been meditating alot, but I consider I think part of the problem is I expect something to happen. I guess my first experiences spoiled me a bit, like I got my cake before working for it. Im not sure I understand why it happened other then maybe to get my full attention to this and spark the birth of faith in me. I will say though I had such a realization today during meditation. Nothing really happened dramatically, I was meditating on my peaceful island in my mind when I heard in my mind, subtly and from no where I needed to find myself. I dont know where it came from but thanks to the power of google I discovered something called a higher self, and I think I really need to find out how to talk with this higher self.I will say all my life I've wanted to be in the US Air Force, even now I still do but I was afflicted with something that is destroying my body from a early age and denied that lifes dream and the plan that went with it and since alittle time after I'd felt different like, its difficult to explain but that there was another me with me, a genderless wiser me. For all these years I thought I was getting some kind of dissaociative disorder or something but after reading about higher selves, it just seemed like this other me I've felt is this higher selve, It fits the description to a T, but I have no way to consciously speak to her/him. It was an amazing epiphany to put this together.

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    Re: New to Spirituality, need guidance

    I think the trick is to learn to listen, and when you get very good at this, then you can expect interesting things. Think of it as watching tv- no expectations, you get yourself comfy and get yourself ready to 'see' whatever comes up.
    Get to the point when it's just you and the silence, and then get further.
    AD Pedia:http://www.astraldynamics.com.au/sho...abetical-Order
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    "Stop acting as if life is a rehearsal" Dr. Wayne Dyer.

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    Re: New to Spirituality, need guidance

    I concur with the others here, especially on meditation. Mindfulness in Plain English (Bhante Gunaratana) is a fantastic book, as is Buddhist Meditation for Tranquility and Insight by Kamalashila. Learn to quiet your mind and see what's been waiting below the surface of your thoughts. Once you begin to escape the drag of the current thought exerts, you'll find clarity and wisdom naturally begin to surface on the rest. That's when you're ready for true investigation and insight.

    Just my two cents.


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    Re: New to Spirituality, need guidance

    Quote Originally Posted by LenaNight View Post
    I've been meditating alot, but I consider I think part of the problem is I expect something to happen.
    Meditation is like exercising. It can seem boring, repetitive, like chore, and you don't see much really happening when you do it, but the more you do it, the more you can do, and the more benefits you get. One day you notice, hey, I'm not getting tired going up this hill, and I always used to, or you suddenly realise, hang on, I'm not actually THINKING anything, the inside of my head is quiet (both of these have happened to me, just FYI ). Meditation brings many benefits, but a lot of them are subtle, and few are immediate. Expecting something to "happen" is like expecting to be able to run in a marathon the second day you've gone to the gym. It's not very likely, and probably not even desirable.

    I'm just trying to give you a bit of framework that might help.
    May the light surround you, may you be blessed. May the light surround us, may we be blessed. May love and light surround us all, and may we all be healed and blessed. And so it is, and so it shall be, now and ever after.

  10. #10
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    Re: New to Spirituality, need guidance

    Quote Originally Posted by LenaNight View Post
    its difficult to explain but that there was another me with me, a genderless wiser me. For all these years I thought I was getting some kind of dissaociative disorder or something but after reading about higher selves, it just seemed like this other me I've felt is this higher selve, It fits the description to a T, but I have no way to consciously speak to her/him. It was an amazing epiphany to put this together.
    Yes, I can relate, and I am sure others can, too. It is possible, for example in the dreamworld and the nonphysical, to expect life from that self's perspective. How much one can remember and bring back from such a perspective change varies. I remember feeling oddly surprised what one could feel that one knew that one cannot remember, the odd feeling of waking and having forgotten what one knew but not how it feels to know.

    If you have a wish like joining the air force which seems impossible to fulfill, maybe you can go into the wish and desire itself and find the underlying motivations that make it arise. Many concrete things and concrete desires could also be seen as one possible expression of an underlying desire or need of a more general or different nature. Maybe it can find another expression still if you knew what motivated it.
    Looking for assistance in sorting things out in your life? My intuitive friend Robyn can help. http://intuitivebalance.weebly.com/

    My blog: http://www.astraldynamics.com.au/blog.php?1595-Korpo

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