Nursing babies

[susan]

5th little piglet returned home safely feeling the richest person in the world.
Two weeks around the warmest, kindest, most hospitable,fun loving, sincere, honourable, humble people I could ever wish to be with. Many I had never met before. These people could be put in a category that many people are currently seeing as a threat.
However I only speak of the people I met. We are all individual personalities.Such wise words picked up during my May holiday....." Not to judge people by their religion. Judge them by their aura".

Last three weeks no energy work, no meditation practice.
Inner voice very quiet but at times of deep thinking some was coming through. ( a reminder of part of signature picked up once... " She is part of your deepest thoughts".)

Had gone to bed one night thinking how quiet things had become and thinking of intuition. If ever I was to develop good intuition would I loose this inner voice I hear? I never want to loose it. I woke up with no dream recall but picked up.." The Subconscious Allows Free Thinking".

One night I had been overwhelmed by the warmth around me given off by these people .... The cuddles and kisses from the children also.
I woke to seeing a certificate with a name on it and where the specialised subject would be written were the words ..GOD FINDER..

Woke one morning to singing. Just caught the last two words. " heavens plane."

My ugly side was pointed out in a dream two days before the event which saved any bad feelings.
2 days before holiday a short dream . I'm in the back of a car and someone is in the drivers seat and points out two people across the road and tells me to look at them.
I see a very ugly woman shouting to someone. A male approaches her. I got the feeling they were related. She shouts at him . I got the feeling he had dissapeared somewhere and she was angry with him but I also got the feeling that he was trying to explain where he had been and it was not his fault. ( in the dream I just seemed to know )
What stood out here was just how ugly the woman was.

So , 2 days later at Charles De Gaulle airport waiting at the notice board for info to tell us which gate to go to. Finally, the information is displayed. What does HB do? Decides to go to the toilet first. DOWNSTAIRS.
He was away ages. I couldn't believe he could do this. He had had ample time. People who were waiting also had all now dissapeared. Could feel myself getting hotter and hotter, tensing up, we were going to miss the flight, how stupid. Trying to decide what words I could use on him to get the message across.
Suddenly once again during a thought free moment the dream popped into my head. This was me!!!! I was the ugly woman. My ugly side represented by ugly features.
Just in time I relaxed muscles that had become tense, completely chilled, decided that if he had suddenly decided he needed the loo then he had to go.( I of all people should understand that)decided we have plenty of time, we aren't going to miss the flight.
He arrived back, I smiled and we went on our way with ample time.

[susan]

Co- incidence or not?

Dream.
I'm trying to do something and getting frustrated. Michael Jackson is trying to help me but I've made it worse for him.
I'm making it even worse and fling myself on the bed in frustration and start to cry.

Woke up.

This is my frustration feeling lost again. Hard to find time for this. Need fast track to get back into it. My mind is taken up with everyday living and back to work. Not sure which route to take in limited time. Raising energy? Clearing chakras? Meditation? Observation? Projecting energy?
Time is so limited.
Sent out a request for guidance in my decisions for this.

Time to get up . Passed radio in kitchen and decided to switch on.
Michael Jacksons song is playing and at this exact time he sings..' Let me show you the way to go.'

[susan]

This was written by me in the journal last year.
Taken from Deepak Chopra's understanding of the Observer/ Observed role which I was experiencing. This was new to me.

*****. Page 48.

My spirit is an alert witness of the roles I play. Whilst it may be my destiny to play an infinity of roles I Am Not these roles.
The detached observor ( me) of the role has woken up, ****. EVEN WHEN SLEEPING*****
We can be engaged in a role to currently perform , even passionate about the way we perform it but detached at the same time.
He talks of the actor on the stage of life with us being the actor, director, everything and everyone.
This all adds up to what I've written over the last few weeks, stage, puppets, Observer.

********

I've brought this forward because this morning Ive noticed a change in the role I played in the dream.

I woke this morning feeling so much love for someone I was talking to in the dream.This feeling of peace and calmness lasted for hours later.
Recalling the dream I realised this was once again about me shuffling work and doing too much. However I know Character A and B are both me, but in two short dreams I was not character A ( Susan) I was character B who had all the love and compassion for Susan and realy wished she would slow down.
I was talking to me (Susan) with such love for her and kind of shadowing her. In the past I had been aware of someone entering my dream or following me and interacting with me but this time I was that person and didn't feel I was Susan.
When I woke I was still feeling the love I had for Susan.

This is hard trying to write down and maybe comes across a bit strange but I know exactly what I'm trying to say with difficulty.

Because of this I'm now thinking back to the above post where I was at ceiling height in a packed theatre and asked if I was going to stay for the show.
I was going to be observing the play from a height.( I would be observing myself, my role in physical as a seperate person.)
The Thunderbirds character 'BRAINS'wearing large glasses..
.. Large glasses?.".. Seeing clearly?
...Brains.....encouraged to think about this? Work out? Understand?


Bit more on the Buddhist idea of observer ....

Buddhist doctrine has a definition of the observer that perhaps fits better than that of psychoanalytic theory. The observer or witness is thought of as an aspect of the higher self that is cultivated through meditative practice. This version of the observer is a portion of consciousness that metaphorically looks over the shoulder of the individual and helps to inform them of their actions and the reasons for them. This helps the Buddhist practitioner to stay on their chosen path rather than putting energy into everything that fascinates the ego.

by David R Hill.


Was this an aspect of me ( Susan) merging during sleep with an aspect of my higher self helping the unconscious me?

[susan]

Liminal stage this morning between 6-9 am.


A news reporter is standing outside a small restaurant infront of a window.
He is reporting on someone inside having a meal. The camera now focuses inside to a woman at a table. She picks up a fish and puts the head in her mouth. The tail was still wagging. The fish was still alive.
My reaction to this was of disgust. The camera now focuses on her plate. It was awful. Prawns and little fish were alive and running around the plate. Horrible to look at and imagine eating.

This next one was a continuation before wakeing up.

I'm with a small group of people and someone brings a dead human body and tilts it to show what has contaminated the body inside. Brown waste pours out of the body onto my lovely cream rug.


I seemed to wake up slightly to ponder over this and then picked up two more that seemed to connect with each other.

I'm in a classroom and I haven't done something. I then see a tall oblong glass container filled with water. Very narrow but very tall. On the outside against the glass is a rusty sheet of metal and a magnet the shape of a battery is being run along the rusty sheet moving upwards. The water starts to rotate.


That was all but enough.
Last night I had been exhausted from work and HB had cooked a lovely meal.
Pasta with a tomato chilli sauce filled with pieces of salmon and prawns. I loved it and commented how nice it was and we will have to have it again soon!

A news reporter reporting something usually is important for me. This journey started with a news reporter.

1st page of journal....

The plane lands, a large blue car travels up a very steep hill where the occupant gets out and someone ( a news reporter) is standing on the summit recording the arrival of the passenger.
........

This seemed to have the same importance.
Oh dear, I've always said that I would continue to eat fish but I just don't know now. I need to contemplate this . It's a big decision but to be honest the first two I picked up were repulsive and disgusting and that is how the meat started and then the alcohol.
I just don't know what I would eat.

The tunnel of water and magnet I'm sure relates to energy / magnetic pulls/ spiralls / vortex.
Might learn a bit more there.

Magnetic Water.


Found this by Robert.
Developing Natural Resistance

The best explanation of how conscience and higher-self guidance works, was given to me by an old priest in Sunday school, when I was all of nine years old. He said to imagine I had a little devil on my left shoulder and a little angel on my right, both whispering advice continually.


The little devil works through the ego, urging quick gratification of life's desires, wants and vices. Its pure selfishness, greed, cruelty and cunning. It will do anything to satisfy its desire, no matter whom gets hurt in the process.


The little angel works through the mind, virtues and higher emotions. It speaks for ones spirit, for ones higher-self, and for ones Creator. The little angel points out moral issues and the difference between right and wrong, warning us of potential consequences. It will help satisfy ones actual life needs and goals. But it would rather have us starve than see us steal bread from another. It is unselfish, kind, gentle and wise. This aspect of mind nurtures a high order of moral thought and spirituality.


Another way to look at the above, is to imagine that every vice attracts a little devil to support it, and that every virtue attracts a little angel to promote it. All religions and schools of spiritual discipline promote the ideal that one has to conquer all desires (to become desire-less) and to develop all virtues, in order to attain enlightenment.

[susan]

Eckhart Tolle

Eckhart Tolle: The Awakening of Consciousness - SuperSoul.tv
http://www.supersoul.tv/supersoul-se...-consciousness
Love listening to him.
22 mins into it he talks of connecting deeply with what is around you.
He explains that there is the FORM identity of you that performs in physical.The other half of you is the FORM- LESS you, timeless essence of which you are.Your Ultimate Self.

A good quote from him,

What a liberation to realise that "the voice in my head" is not who I am.

Who am I then?

The one who sees that.

He quotes an ancient saying.
Consciousness sleeps in the stone..
Consciousness dreams in the plant.
Consciousness AWAKENS in the animal.
Consciousness AWAKENS to itself in the human.

..... It is unselfish, kind, gentle and wise. This aspect of mind nurtures a high order of moral thought and spirituality.
....All religions and schools of spiritual discipline promote the ideal that one has to conquer all desires (to become desire-less) and to develop all virtues, in order to attain enlightenment.

Unselfish. Kind. Gentle. Wise.
This advice from Roberts priest all those years ago clinches it for me.
Could someone with all those qualities bang the head of a fish when caught in the hook of a fishing line to finish it off? When I was 14 I was the one who caught 2 river trout when fishing for the first time with my family. I pulled it in, mum and dad put it in the basket but it was still wriggling, alive. I cannt remember if it was me or not who killed it.
So easy to open a can of tuna...........

I will try but may fail. 2 days now without fish. My dreaming mind is very positive.
This morning half awake / asleep saw a large room with hundreds of exercise bikes as if in a gym and all the seats were bright colours. Red, green,yellow ,orange etc..
For the clairvoyance practicing colour is a good idea but the exercise bikes..Absolutly No Way!
Or maybe the colours were the colours of the chakras and this was a riddle. Work on the chakras.

Been reading a lot on magnetised water.Have sent away for a place mat.

[susan]

Projection this morning sometime between 6.30-7.15 and just when I wasn't even trying. I have no idea what this one was about.

Around 5.00am awake so little stimulation of chakras but heart wasn't in it. Back to sleep.Woke up 6.20. Recalled dream, hot in bed so kicked off duvet and lay on back just cooling off and cozy.
Within minutes the loud roaring noise in the head like a plane waiting to take off right next to me. Recognised as pre- projection noise.
No vibrations but sensed moving upwards and backwards.No awareness of loosening of body . Think this was through the brow as I was not aware of body parts the whole experience.
As I was moving backwards first , to the right of me I saw a child's leg wearing white ankle socks , floating.
This didn't make sense at the time so decided to ignore and to forget it. Let it go.
Now I'm travelling forwards very fast still with loud noise. Everything black. Ahead in the distance I could see something. A few things then quickly they are in font of me.
These were like many different shaped Windows with coloured glass with different figures engraved in each. These were just like Windows you would find in old churches. They were rotating round and round.
Couldn't get long enough to stare at any one in particular to see who was depicted when suddenly they re to the right if me then behind.Gone.

Now sense of moving forwards in black again but it clears and gets brighter and I'm coming into what looks like an arena in the distance.Seemed massive, only saw the area to the left for spectators and far ahead near the other end a load of chariots driven by horses. OMG! This was like going back in time.
I still wasn't standing on the ground as if I had feet but hovering at a low enough height .
I couldn't work this out. What was it about ? The chariots then started heading towards me. Got little anxious but stilled mind. Nothing is solid. Nothing can harm. The horse was heading straight for ne and looked so strong and powerful. Just as the two front legs are over me it's gone. Everything dissapeared. All is black, fully awake in body. Slight feeling of vibration . Checked clock. 7.15am.


So, I have no idea what this was all about but delighted just to have experienced it.

1) coloured church Windows engraved with people, ? Religious figures.? Rotating suggesting energy movement.( I wonder if anyone else has come across these?)

2) the arena? Was this a simulation for consideration? If so why? Fear tests are long gone.I don't expect there to be an astral plane where this is still going on. Inhabitants of that era would probably be well advanced by now. ( could be any of us)
Could this have been some kind of history stored like in the Akashic records?

I'll have to wait to see if anything is added to this in the future.

( 1/10/16... page 57 concludes this was a simulation for my attention)

Well, once again I'm writing of an event happening after (with little effort from me ) I've done something positive. Whether it's a good deed for someone, good thoughts. This time ..THE FISH decision.
Like being given a treat as an incentive .
Ready for the next.

Need to add a thought here. Why didn't I just move out of the way.?I had thoughts rolling through my head as it was happening but I just decided to stay. Maybe this is an automatic reaction from previous times when I felt I was being tested for fear . A kind of 'bring it on'. When in RTZ in the past sometimes I felt I was in complete control, sometimes not . Astral often this other part of me is in control. Like when I just rolled out of the train window during the "Gratitude " experience.

Edited 30/05/17

Mystery of windows in space solved.
Taken from. http://astral-institute.com/mysticis...he-paranormal/

..... As you travel mystically towards the Galactic Heavens you will find that you must go through a corridor which has stained glass windows of Christ and all of His apostles floating in the ethereal winds on each side. Why would this be? Because other worlds know Christ as Messiah just as we do. He has incarnated into many worlds for the same function.

[susan]

Clairvoyance this morning whilst in liminal stage.
Once again images that flashed up so quickly seperatly .

I had still been undecided whether I should skip the all over energy work and spend more time in the future concentrating on just the brow.
What I don't want is to loose that excitment of feeling I'm moving, travelling, going somewhere.

1). Saw someone riding a lovely three wheeler bicycle. It was in bright colours again, red, orange, yellow etc..and made up of circles. Even the back rest was made up of circles.
Not a single straight line to be seen.

2) A quick thought... "This Is You! Then I see Mary Poppins holding an umbrella just slowly raising into the sky.

3) A giant Munrano glass bead about 1 foot in diameter slotted around a woman's foot.

The Munrano glass bead links to my pandora bracelet I've written about that only holds charms that have reminders of wonderful Mystical experiences I never want to forget.

The NEWS will continue, and colours, and chakras.


Still none the wiser about the last excursion. It's the chariots racing in the arena I cannt work out. Have sent out for help in understanding this but get nothing.

[susan]

If ever I needed one last push to clean up my insides even further I've just had it.
Yesterday I'd been reading up more on diet and watching video by Dr Robert Cassar on Bio- Photonic Light Absorption.
I'm having to put a little more effort into thinking what to have for meals since the fish episode but so far so good. Had decided today will just be fruit and salad and water.

This morning just as HB leaves for work my Kitchen sink blocks. I've just spent 2 hours on my knees unscrewing the plastic U bend and all the other bits taking disgusting black gunge from the parts. It Absolutly Stinks. It was so thick.
This has me thinking back to what goes down there. Only what goes in my mouth plus sometimes detergent. Collection of food rinsed from plate . I don't expect the food to turn like that in my stomach and colon but all I can say is I want any food I eat to give me the nutrition and energy required for body then get out as quick as possible!
Now I'm not suggesting for one moment my sink blocked up just when Susan needed a push. But possibly the other way round. Maybe the push I received from the othe side was timed well to coincide with the sink.

[susan]

I want to bring this forward to remind me.
The suggestion of someone else feeling there is someone with us, accompanying us.
Also I'm sure there has been a discussion somewhere about someone standing on a planet looking at two planets close by and asking if anyone else has experienced this.

Susan.
3rd Sept 2011
Dreaming Forum

beautiful colours
Hi, 2 nights ago I went to sleep as normal. I slept right through the night which is very unusual. When I woke up I didn,t want to and went back to sleep.When I finally woke I felt so happy, cosy,content, warm and also excited.It,s hard to put into words how I felt but I know I hadn,t wanted to wake up.I remembered a lot of the dream except how I got there.

I was standing on a dark planet that had no life on it.The sky was different shades of grey to almost black but up in the sky were 2 planets close to each other. I felt that they orbited the planet I was on but they were awesome.Far too close for comfort but I did,nt feel threatened at all.
The most spectacular sight was the most beautiful colours trying to peep through the dark clouds.
(imagine holding a crystal up to the sunlight and the colours they would reflect).These were trying to break through the dark sky. The colours were breathtaking.Iknow I wasn,t alone because as the colours came through I was pointing up to the sky in amazement as if showing someone the beautiful sight.
Could this have been more than just a dream


Re: beautiful colours
Hello, susan.

Kurt calls the feeling you describe bliss. If bliss follows an experience it was a meaningful transformation for you. And the experience sounds like it was one of that kind, too.

I often have the feeling of being accompanied during experiences, though I often also do not recall anyone or seeing someone. But I point things out to them, talk to them, or show them things.

Cheers,
Oliver. ( korpo)

[susan]

Lovely short dream this morning after some deep thinking.

Dream.

I'm beside a cherry tree in blossom ( on tv last night) and pick some cherries to put into a bowl of water on the table on the patio.( I know there wouldn't realy be cherries at the same time as blossom but this is what I dreampt)
Next I pick off a piece of bark off the trunk and put it in the bowl of water. As I look at it it seems to be the shape of a mussel and seems to be half bark and half shell, so shout out to my father who is around the corner with others.( not my real dad) I got the feeling of a mollusc at the same time. As they all come closer it turns over in the water and a small head appears from under the shell. Then two little feet. This was a baby turtle and it was alive and wakening up . In the dream I was astounded and found it so cute but at the same time sad that if we hadn't realised it was alive we would have put it in boiling water to cook.
End of dream.

Mmmmmm we have to boil mussels alive. How far do I go with this one.

Thoughts.

This was one of those nice dreams where I seem to be a child again.
Yesterday I had been offered another care home to provide my services and needed the weekend to make a decision. When I went to bed I was undecided. It would bring in more money but I had to remind myself that I'm trying to cut down work. Too many care homes realy exhaust me.
I would only be chasing money . But money is money.
I woke from a dream suggesting the way I was thinking..... That it isn't my responsibility to provide the service and I cannt do everything just to please others. So before going back to sleep I came to the decision that even though the money would be useful to buy things I DIDNT NEED I must say NO so I can stick to my original aim of more time off, more energy and more focus on learning and I must get back to the focusing outside myself , projecting my energy exercises, and " Coming Out Of My Womb".
Happy with this decision went back to sleep happy.
Had this happy dream.


But this has made something click inside and has given me new enthusiasm.

From tree( plant consciousness)

to a mussel (sea life creature, consciousness)

to a turtle ( partial sea life/ land dwelling)

Learning and respecting the capabilities of all. This reminds me somewhere in the journal where I was stroking a sea anenomie and interacting with it.



Out from the woodwork.
Page 28.
17/06/14


Dream. / failed OBE / Dream.
Very unusual dream which seemed to take on a different direction. Nothing relevant to previous posts.
I had previously picked up that my mother was disappointed and could I meet up with her on Sunday?
So , Sunday evening had had a very heavy full meal late in evening ( which I try to avoid) Early hours of Monday morning when awake I recalled a dream of a police woman telling me that my car had failed Its MOT.
Whilst awake I feel so disappointed with myself to have had such a heavy meal, feeling I had failed myself in the possibility of experiencing something.
Taking this as ' get back to sleep your not going to experience anything' , I just accepted and decided there's always another chance another day.
Visit to bathroom, little water , settled to token gesture of energy raising then settled for sleep when jelly feeling , wobbling and I knew that this was a good sign. Focused on brow area , could feel movement but here was nothing fast about this. This was in one direction and steadily in one direction. As I focused I decided to just experiment with vision as I had nothing.decided to open astral/ etheric eyes and they opened. Thinking how good this was that I hadn't opened physical !!!! Stupid! End of , back to body .
So once again in one evening I'm disappointed.
Back to sleep wake up next morning. Recalled dream .
This will seem stupid to readers but here goes.
I'm in a large area where I'm waiting and flying around and practicing keeping up off the ground when someone of importance comes in . I just see a pair of trousers but see nothing from above. They give me a book. This is thick and heavy and as I open it the first page shows a 2x human bodies at the top, at the bottom was an animal of some sort and a baby and I got this is how we evolved to humans.
Woke up again and thinking how vivid this was and in fact (a bit in your face .), visited the bathroom and slept .
Woke up later in morning to dream recall .
I saw a statue representing my mother ( I thought at the time)
I' m sitting opposite someone who is advising me .
The statue comes next to me . Next thing it is a giant plant , like an anemone from the sea.
This was / is my mother.
I touch this /her as I ask questions.
Can you hear me? The flow from her is a yes.
Can you see me ? The flow from her is yes ,
Can you feel me ? The flow from her is yes .
Can you talk to me ? The flow goes in the opposite direction.
End of dream .
When I woke up, this had such a impact and got me thinking deeper than I have .
Thinking of the evolution of plants .
Can plants communicate to other higher intelligence? Animals can to humans . Humans can to higher beings in spirit ??
Oh just a dream but food for thought .
I am no biologist and this is just a dream . For my own way of thinking for this journal anyone reading this just think of this as a dream that Susan had ,
For me ?

Add on .
I felt the need to do a search on Sea Anemones and was showing my ignorance when describing this as a plant.

***Although often known as the Flower of the Sea it is in fact a Water Dwelling Meat Eating Animal.
***It has a primitive nervous system.
***Has an Intelligence Within. Some form relationships with green algae receiving oxygen and sugar as the bi- product of the algae's photosynthesis.
Upon reflection I think the sea anemone was an excellent example for me to be shown.I would have expected within a dream to be shown an animal that I knew definetely as an animal.
This animal , previously thought by me as a plant highlights the intelligence within anything living from aquatic animals to terrestrial animals to amphibians. Then of course there are the plants.
Conclusion. This last dream was for my attention .