Nursing babies

**susan** · 15th April 2018, 10:49 AM

Will add to, keep getting logged off.

In physical for the past 3 months I've realy been trying hard not to judge people or allow any bad thoughts come into my mind. Trying to see the best in them ,imagine being them, understanding. These last 3 months have realy seen a big effort from me. This life at the moment is so different and I'm back in the UK for 4 weeks but I dont think I want to stay any longer than that.
( back to edit)
I feel I havent realy said what I mean very well, so I'll try again.
For the last 3 months `I've had a lot of fear.Not of people but of the driving on the roads. The people I've met - some may have caused me to be cautious but have ended up being so kind, generous, curtious, respectful. This place is rich in culture, disorganised, tomorrow means next week, but I realy enjoy the craziness of it. I just have to overcome the fear. When fear is completely eliminated I hope its replaced with just sensible caution so I can enjoy the experience of living amongst these lovely people.

I want to bring this old post forward.
The first dream where the baby's face was moulding, merging with the fabric of the sheet. This reminds me of the 'fabric of the universe'. Everything all connecting, being connected.

I think my hard work is maybe paying off and I'm doing okay!

Journal 6th June 2013. Page 8.

Originally Posted by susan

Golden threaded universe.
I am currently reading Jurgen ZIewe's 'Multi Dimensional Man' and I love his style of writing. It's one of the best books I've read but what I am encouraged by are the similarities of experiences.
A few years ago in my paper journal I wrote of viewing behind closed eyelids an exquisite fine gold threaded universe,so fine and sparkling with golden planets and gold lines like thread seemed to connect them.
I have just read today that Jurgen experienced the same.
He describes" ......unfolded the universe in front of me. A vast space opened up, and a giant symmetrical web made from golden threads, each junction studded with an enormous golden sun. Each sun casting off golden patterns, which interacted with each other."

He writes of being with a group of friends that he appears to know but not in physical.
I am currently experiencing the same,( I'm sure many are on this site)
Just love his book.

**susan** · 9th June 2013, 10:13 PM

Have almost finished Jurgen's book and feel so happy to read his descriptions of the beautiful sounds, colours, plant life giving off sound etc. he has experienced in higher dimensions.
I feel confident now that what I have experienced and then written about in my magical sections were real.
My near collision with a car,
The mushroom that gave off a beautiful sound.
They are so beautiful to remember and out of this world that when faced with physical reality I would be the outsider considered ' not quite 100% , or there. or with it.
I don't care anymore what people think ,because they are the ones who are ' not quite there yet'.

**GMAN12** · 9th June 2013, 10:17 PM

Yes. More experiences for us. The ones who are considered the outsiders. We are spirits living in billions of packed atoms that we call bodies. Most people will never be where we are at now in our lives. Not in this life is what I claim.

**susan** · 14th June 2013, 08:52 PM

I have nothing of interest to record here for people to read but for my own record I feel I should.
I feel a little deserted which is not the first time, nor the second.Meditation and energy raising almost every day. No energy surges.
The other day woke up to an ariel view of a white city with pink cloud around.
Recalled dream and a really pretty girl looks at me and then my husband and takes us to a table to look at a pamphlet on the table
It was folded in 3 as pamphlets are and on the front are 2 people. She says these are your parents...look ( now I was only dreaming this so I don't have any vivid recall of the features of the male and female.) Inside the folder was a lovely white city with dome like tops to the buildings and I remember zooming down to an area that had a large seating area but larger than normal. In the dream I thought this was not real because of the pink colouring around it, pink clouds.
Now I am going to dismiss this dream because the book I was reading had a front cover which showed a part scene with pink clouds around . Just a reminder to me that when I am not connected I can have dreams recalled in detail that are so easy to think of as real.

**susan** · 16th June 2013, 10:49 AM

OBE.
It seems a long time to me since I actual had a consciously induced OBE,well 2 months,but it happened early this morning..
Conditions were perfect, in a good frame of mind looking forward to gardening tomorrow and buying some new plants. In other words no negative thoughts,happy frame of mind.2 am awake with hubby snoring,started energy raising just in feet up legs and base chakra. 4am still awake with snoring,at some stage after this the symptoms started,no vibrations but loud astral noise like a plane waiting to take off.Knew I had succeeded so concentrated hard on the noise. Felt myself raise up slowly and made a quick decision, not interested in wandering round house just get out there,straight up as quick as possible but I felt everything was so slow. Felt resistance in the roof but got through it. I had no destination in mind but I was still focusing on the sound hoping I could increase speed. ( bit like watching Appolo take off from the ground,plenty of noise but seems to go so slowly at first. )
For some reason I was travelling now sideways then found myself in a dark looking room.( no colour) A television was in front of me and when I turned sideways there was someone who looked like my late mother sitting on a chair.I knew immediately that this couldn't be her because if it was really her she would welcome me or hug me but she was just ignoring me.A man was sitting watching telly as well and I didn't recognise him. I was wondering why I was seeing this and realised they couldn't see me. A younger man was sitting also but he was in a very comfy position. I walked in front of all three wondering who the two men were. Just then the younger man sat up and he was a younger version of the older man. Father,son seemed the obvious. Knowing that they couldn't see me I decided to see if they could feel me. I got my astral arm and attempted to punch the young man in the leg.( violence in the astral)
I made some kind of impact because he let out a joking kind of sound as if he had been playfully hurt. He let out a big grin and looked over at my mother even though she was too far away to have done it.I was being ignored or I couldn't be seen? So decided to leave up through the roof and once again very very slow but raised up and just travelled seeing small square drawings in the bottom of my vision.ignored them and ended up back in bed,felt myself come back into body, bit like jelly again. Opened eyes.
What was that all about?

**susan** · 17th June 2013, 08:28 AM

Strange couple of dreams . The fear factor seems to be emerging but I didn't think I had any issues. Great day gardening ,re-arranging, being creative in a way.Went to bed very happy.
Dreams this morning involved me being in my garage and cockroaches came in all over the floor.( okay in physical life I would run) In my dream I did jump up on something making a bit of a fuss when two big dogs came in and chased them away. I remember thinking how strange they looked as they all scurried towards a flap in the garage door leading outside.If you can imagine a big magnet and a load of pins close to it they just seemed to bang and pile up to the flap and rush outside. The two big dogs came up to me and for a stroke because they had helped me.
Other dream I'm being rushed along by a woman to board a small plane. It all happens so quickly and when boarding I'm told my seat number is 80. I go to the end of the small plane looking for my seat but the plane has taken off already and the numbers only go up to 34.I have to stand but I have to hold on to the sides and balance myself because the female young pilot is having fun with the plane and doing risky manoeuvres.One is to go under a small arch sideways leading to a public high street with people on.
Everyone else seemed to just enjoy the experience.
Third dream an undesirable character seems to be in my company and offers me a chocolate mars bar to eat. Under the wrapper it's been chewed at, it would be horrible to eat.
Seems strange to be experiencing fear related dreams or undesirable people. Can't think why? Bring back the magic (subconscious) please

**susan** · 20th June 2013, 08:31 PM

Now forgive me for anyone reading this as it is only a " non private thought" not interesting, but for me I need to log this.
Really tired other day and saw same green aura round red bath mat.
Today,working,not so tired , waiting for next patient , looked at chair saw aura , not trying. ( same colour chair - deep red therefore saw pale green)
What I'm trying to record here is that I have a lot of tiredness going on. Since January\ February ( holiday,eating too much) but when it comes to raising energy I want to and get so far but there is something deep in my mind telling me not to or I don't need to.
Now I have had physical symptoms such as .... Sore throat

( after brushing dry cement from patio) ....spots on face ..( a lot of perspiration with the heat , only 2 , went away quickly. ) Mouth ulcer on gum, went away quickly. For the last 2 days ulcer on tongue. Not big and getting better but I have always boasted on having a great immune system .
We all know what the benefits are of raising the NEWS WAY. so my query is .. Not.... Why is my immune system a little low ?
...but... When I need to improve it why during this time am I feeling I don't want to raise energy. Is my subconscious telling me that my immune system is a little low and my energy levels are low therefore don't because it will use up even more energy.??
I truly feel this is why I can not get back on track at the moment .
I can recall Obe or dreams but can not concentrate on deliberate energy raising or meditation.

**susan** · 21st June 2013, 10:56 AM

I'm producing dreams in animation.
When I woke up this morning and recalled dream it had me laughing because of the way it was acted out but was definitely related to my thoughts yesterday through the day . To do with judging people by their appearance,not to,but to look deeper inside. And who to trust. A hard exterior on a person can hide the true person.
It was like watching an old film when they had jerky movements and the characters were like cartoon style.Humour at the end where I'm in a pram being pushed by someone, other prams are being pushed by men, then we all raise up into the sky and disappear.
One pram runs away sideways and the man runs after it.
Now the points are,
The style of the characters.
The humour at the end.
The last time I was watching animated characters behind closed eyelids but whilst awake. This was of Tarzan and Jane in an arena and they were fun fighting. The same kind of movements. At that time I got the words ..."TIM CARTOONIST".
I've checked my paper journal and it was the same week last year. Coincidence.
Steven Spielberg watch out,but I'm thinking that sometimes we could all do with just a little humour. If we have it here we'll still have it over there. Just my thoughts.

**susan** · 23rd June 2013, 11:27 AM

Fab so excited with what happened this morning .
One of the most awake Fully conscious OBE...FAB.
But first the background.
Yesterday decided I need to do more visual exercises for the third eye using colour a lot as I seem to be starting to see auras.Cut down on the NEWS just for a little . Remembered a classroom type dream a while back of coloured balloons but substituted balloons for pieces of colourful fruit. Did 30 mins exercise yesterday.
Woke up this am ,too early to get up,did some more exercises with colour , followed with only about 5 mins of bringing energy from feet up to heart then from crown down through third eye down to heart.
Decided I'd done enough,started thinking about the pile of ironing to try to get through today,could hear my neighbour taking her dog out, could hear my husband breathing behind me, could feel my feet raising from the bed.
I was going somewhere,lifted from body travelling upwards but no effort on my part,no roof to go through,no visual signs of house or sky or stars. I knew I was going to be shown something so just stared ahead ,I did however get the feeling of movement.
Saw cartoon characters,big sizes and lovely bold colours but they were upside down.In my mind I said " turn them round" .They turned round but soon disappeared.

This is the best bit.
In the distance I could see a side profile of my oldest son. My vision then went to the right and a little baby was lying down propped up so you could see the face.I wanted to see more clearly but I seemed to be at a distance and didn't have any awareness of having a body.Then my son came closer facing me and he was holding the baby for me to see....so cute...lovely round face and I'm not sure if the eyes were slightly oriental.then it faded and I opened my eyes immediately.
Now there are options for me to consider.
1) was this a baby that in the future my son will have?
2) was this me?
3) was this AKEO?
4) 2+3 was this me- AKEO.
This was the son who in my recorded dream brought a little boy for me to see called AKEO.
I have listed above other past life holograms or pictures that all have taken more than one night .like a continuation,a build up to the event.
Fab, Fab, fab

**susan** · 23rd June 2013, 08:27 PM

22nd march I posted an OBE where the message was not to let children or fear get in the way.This was shortly after the tunnel vision of the boy in a silver / white wig to shoulder length . I felt I wanted to know more but when I got this message I decided not to focus on learning more about this boy but just .....go with the flow......
I am thinking more of this today . Cockroaches ....fear... Not to get in the way.... Children to get in the way....
I learnt no more of my young boy in period costume, I've had a build up to AKEO. The previous nights dream in animation with humour that ended in many babies in prams being pushed by many men up into the sky.
I will leave my thoughts open till the next event ,but a possibility is --- was this another?