-how pretty the snow is
-determination to be positive today. to keep D out of my mind today(besides mentioning him now in these posts)and to go a whole day without complaining. some slip ups,but felt vibe rise a bit earlier when starting it,so will keep it up
-laughing at the insane weather,and the idea of anyone trying to hurry up and go on dates this week. it was -1 degrees yesterday and now it looks like a snowstorm practically. laughing at life
-meditation and intuitive feelings coming to me during and also in mundane moments that D and i aren't done,and he will be contacting me by and the date i had in my head of that. realizations and reflections on life. quiet and space to just be,and see what's unfolded. appreciation for what was,though it does kill me how hindsight always makes one appreciate things more. there is no going back with me and D. something happened.as always,one moment someone is new and an interesting stranger and before you know it,a connection is forged and there is no going back.i feel in all my heart me and him are not done,i feel i will see him before this month is over,and i feel it in a way that is different then in the past when i knew things would work out,and it just blew up in my face with being wrong,i don't know how this feels different,though.if i can even avoid mentioning D to anyone today,that will be progress in the law of detachment,so that will be moreso my goal then keeping him out of my mind,though that is goal,too
-booking something for my first job today. my first press of the new year
-rereading my texts again before bed with D from the last day of our really awful fight,and feeling like he wasn't so kind,and i wasnt quite as crazy seeming as i thought,and i tried making good with him and seeming to apologize. and it just again made me feel like i'm trying hard for someone who is a jerk and who has done a lot of jerk things to me yet treats me like i'm awful villain. i'm glad to have the perspectives balanced and to even know i tried,because later on down the line,i won't regret it,then whereas other times,i wondered could i have done more
-coffee
-water
-sweaters
-heat
-a place to live
-breaks
-being easy on myself
-all the career things going for me which is solace right now. major solace
-catching myself in complaints and turning it around
-the tools at my disposal to raise my vibration and turn things around
-my upcoming job on sunday
-that any moment is a chance to turn things around
-affirmations
-notebook and pen
-how quick one can become happy
-a day and half since using tarot cards! doing good with that,i just wasnt even tempted because of not just that they are negative,but that they're not accurate. anything can be real,if you believe it so,so choose the DESIRABLE perception
-rationality
-my desire to dance
-my sexy body
-my phone data being back so i can go on instagram again
-beauty, and unique beauty
-being able to laugh at life
-how amazing this year is going to be for career
-how really really close i am actually to love goals manifesting,i've just been not appreciating and shutting the blinders to it to really see it
-my sex appeal
-the glamour in my life,and the glamour coming this year
-decisons for how im aiming this year to go career-wise
-being able to be happy for others from my past,like exes,and see their purpose in my life,even if it feels a little sad,i can just feel detached and ok
-how long my hair is
-how attractive i can be
-having model beauty
-happiness,being centered,and faithful
-laughing at life
-realizations with friends that make me laugh,and feel more certain and decisons i make to keep things certain to go well
-how skinny my body is getting
-feeling more feminine,womanly,and delicate by losing the little bit of weight,and even embracing my height
-my dancer's poise
-using my pain to have faith and be inspired
-focus
-determination
-embracing the darkness of life
-my realness
-loving myself,accepting myself,and forgiving myself
-changing my reality
-the possibilities i feel within me
-the test last night that came that i got through,and feel stronger now for getting through it
-all the appreciation for D traits i have now. it's like he is in me. it's crazy! i really wonder about that since we never had sex.i find myself missing being texted random pictures. which is weird,since that used to be one of the things i found weirdest about him,and now i find myself missing it and almost wishing to receive pic texts from people