GRATITUDE LIST

[buttercup]

-my mood starting to lift just a bit
-having realizations and epiphanies
-laughing at the obvious jealousy others have of me
-my cats in their Halloween costumes for this year, having that bought and how adorable they look. Being able to have one little thing to make me smile and laugh
-how nice it feels outside
-remembering fun
-my ambition levels increasing
-cat hugs
-decorating my windows in pumpkin decals. My first time decorating outside.
-putting my little witch out in the living room for decoration that M gave me years ago
-having goals and desires
-showering a little more often
-taking more care to my skin
-feeling a little more attractive
-having jobs starting this week.
-getting another gofundme donation
-having psychic money dreams and seeing them come true
-blankets
-having a new laptop M gave me
-having integrity
-ideas
-newness
-entertainment
-music
-colors
-nightskies
-the new cloud feeding mat for the cats
-having a beautiful look
-my grey fall jacket
-apple cider vinegar
-cleaning spray
-learning
-having money on public transit cards
-bread
-face rollers
-looking young
-M dropping stuff off today
-my faith in God helping me through what's going on
-walking more
-reflecting on my life and where I want it to go, what I want to shed away
-staying strong
-my determination
-listening to others success stories
-working on releasing old baggage
-drinking water
-showering
-embracing what is
-being able to donate plasma
-housecleaners
-yoga
-sunshine
-my creativity
-beauty in life
-pleasant memories
-cool experiences I've had
-klonopin
-cuteness
-pictures
-being a giving person
-compassion
-being able to think differently
-being able to change things.

[buttercup]

-sleep
-gratitude
-remembering spiritual things about reality
-letting myself cry
-buying lysol wipes
-making a payment towards rent
-realizing J's wife L actually just exposed her husband and made him look bad and herself
-relaxing
-having a job coming up
-fashion
-appreciation
-nightskies
-peaceful sounds
-holding my cats
-expressing myself
-staying strong
-wearing makeup
-the nurse at the plasma center that I find kind of attractive
-my landlord being patient with me
-halloween decorations
-my accomplishments with my first career
-processing my feelings
-great designs
-having a baby face
-my hair color
-beauty
-inspiration
-blankets
-hope
-walking
-compassion
-openness
-texting and email more resources
-self forgiveness
-cuteness
-people to text and message online
-standing up for myself
-being safe
-face rolling

[buttercup]

-fashion
-hot guys
-My mood lifting 1000% after starting work again this week
-people having sympathy for me what I went through
-well dressed guys
-well dressed people
-fashion inspiration
-someone I worked with in March finding me at work this week and hanging out with me and making me feel very welcome.
-taking the train since the first time in a few years
-taking the bus since the first time in a few years
-someone helping guide me the right way to go when I had trouble finding work the first day of job 2 this month
-being considered very attractive still
-being considered cute
-free lunch at all my jobs I had this month so far
-makeup
-God protecting me from J and L doing anything further to me since last Friday
-realizing how I want to be a better person
-showering
-htdroxzyine helping my allergies
-drinking water
-drinking orange juice
-looking younger than others my age range
-being smart
-my anxiety medication
-having a decent psychiatrist
-making all my new psychiatrist and therapist appts
-iced lattes
-cute seasonal things
-creativity
-experiencing cool new things like a magician doing magic trick with me and meeting a woman from guiness book of world record records
-randomly running into the girl who was my roommate at the psych ward at my psychiatrist appt
-comfortable socks
-nice weather
-sunshine
-beautiful architecture in my city
-being resourceful
-working hard
-feeling ambitious
-sleep
-M helping me
-walking more
-my brown joggers
-paper towels
-unity
-kind and helpful people
-newness
-learning
-my lip scrub
-walking more
-finding the things that bring me joy and remembering things that did
-the nerve tonic I bought recently
-cuteness
-music
-my accomplishments
-deodorant
-the art of femininity
-my allure
-baby wipes
-apple cider vinegar
-my landlord being patient
-working on my comeback
-mirror affirmations
-being able to order cat litter yesterday
-getting to read notes from doctor appts at new place
-laughing

[buttercup]

-solutions
-klonopin
-drinking water
-sleep
-Halloween candy
-getting an apple crisp macchiato the other day and how delicious it was.
-fashion
-cleaning the bathroom sink
-pumpkin bread
-how sweet and loving my cats are
-someone bringing my groceries by the door for me
-kindness
-helpful people
-drinking orange juice lately
-buying bleach and a lint roller today
-healthy digestion
-ordering a chic new coat online
-laughing at haters and how hard people try proving themselves to me
-prayer
-looking at old accomplishments and memories
-entertainment
-art
-water
-doing laundry
-being proactive
-reaching my goals
-inspiration
-cleanliness
-confirming 2 jobs today
-gratitude for being humbled and looking at the bright side of things
-laughing
-having goals and desires
-sunshine
-bring b and p cat outside
-being resourceful
-M helping me
-researching
-attempting to call the law firm
-starting to believe in myself and good things again
-rates going up and things improving for the work I do
-moisturizers
-God working things out for me
-learning and processing things
-healing
-halloween decorations
-compliments
-being considered very beautiful
-love
-shedding away old aspects of me to become new
-seeing people who were awful getting theirs even if it's not very nice of me to take joy in

[buttercup]

-not letting those who wish ill will on me to have power over me
-ordering toner
-getting pet safe pesticide spray
-house feeling less gross and safer from things i did the last week
-taking care of my skin
-moisturizer
-getting my coat i ordered in the mail
-finding gratitude in getting humbled
-sleep
-blankets
-cleaning a little today
-my landlord being patient with me
-my outlets working once i awoke from my nap
-my mood lifting today
-being hired as an election judge
-having an interview tommorow
-drinking orange juice
-having vegan chicken tenders for dinner
-having enough money to get a pouch of cat food
-cat hugs
-cuteness
-finishing some of my election judge training
-my house feeling cozy from the heat
-clean clothes
-music
-being smart
-having nice eyes
-stretching
-klonopin
-having tapered down to half the amount of anxiety medication i was taking this year compared to the last 3 years which is actually huge
-brushing my hair
-setting intentions
-learning
-possibly talking to that nurse i kind of have a crush on yesterday on the phone(it sounded like him).
-poetry
-love
-my laptop
-the power of surrender
-nightskies

[buttercup]

-my mood being better and being more coherent than when i first left the hospital
-working again and exceeding my earnings from the last month before i stopped working again
-trying out my fitness app just now and doing some exercise
-showering
-my dad sharing his hbo login with me and watching some movies this past week
-clean clothes
-the blue joggers i wore today
-making efforts to fix my life
-makeup
-not letting my ex's wife get to me so much anymore
-prayer
-affirmations
-knowing my ex's wife is going crazy because she is jealous and that she's not stable
-fashion
-beautiful things
-the landlord coming to my place and fixing the radiators
-facing my fears
-seeing M's husband again and breaking the ice finally and seeing he seemed to want to talk for longer and see me
-blankets
-drinking water
-drinking orange juice
-new experiences
-fun and pleasant memories
-nightskies
-sunshine
-halloween decorations
-being smart
-halloween candy
-reflecting on things
-having ideas
-finding old flash drives
-pillows
-surrender
-gratitude
-how cute my cats are
-cat hugs
-becoming more patient
-compliments
-having a nice hair color
-reminiscing
-having a new coat for the season
-entertainment
-being compassionate
-having desires and goals
-moisturizers
-putting care into my appearance

[buttercup]

-getting paid
-hearing back from another boss
-having jobs coming up
-having clean teeth
-my new toner
-being smart
-ordering hair bleach
-ordering black hiking shoes with sparkles on them
-drinking water
-being rational
-mailing my dad's birthday card finally
-healthy digestion
-pet safe pesticide spray
-cool uses for technology
-having great taste
-redeeming a $75 off juvederm deal
-great ideas
-ordering an ipl certificate
-clean socks
-physical exercise
-getting an apple crisp macchiato yesterday
-my pink light
-sleep
-my beauty
-hot drinks
-things slowly returning to a new normal
-compassion
-being able to think for myself
-cat hugs
-cuteness
-being kind
-learning a lot this year
-being in the trends
-having goals
-colors
-comedy
-entertainment
-M being there for me
-nightskies
-babywipes
-style
-working through my feelings

[buttercup]

-Halloween candy
-M giving me money as a "happy Halloween."
-ibuprofen
-hydroxyzine
-seeing m's husband again as they dropped off ibuprofen for me and him actually talking to me and saying be safe etc.
-moisturizer
-fabrics
-having compassion
-handling my problems
-getting another gofundme donation
-having goals and desires
-ideas
-being productive
-my sore throat being gone
-fashion
-cold soda
-apple crisp macchiatos from Starbucks
-going back to my roots little by little by working again and bring around the things I like and that are my scene
-techno music
-parties
-nightclubs
-attractive people
-all the creativity people put in their Halloween costumes
-ravioli
-the cat starting to leave the pumpkin alone
-the cats getting so much attention in the window
-how cute and precious my cats are
-new experiences
-being friendly
-brushing my teeth

[buttercup]

-staying strong through the catastrophes
-getting my red-light wand in the mail
-doing affirmations today in the mirror
-watching movies
-wearing my new coat
-cleaning products
-nighttime walks
-realizing during emotional breakdowns there's good in there to come back to
-having nice hair
-clean sheets
-orange juice
-fasting some days
-being smart
-art
-style
-seeing m's husband with M again
-having ideas
-my mind being more clear, coherent
-taking less then half the anxiety medicine I did in the past
-my femininity
-finding grace in being humbled
-handling things maturely
-cute decorations
-hugging cats
-having compassion
-toner
-brushing my hair
-having goals
-playing with the cats earlier
-trying new things
-oneness
-spirituality
-following ones bliss
-music
-being attractive
-working on the basic pillars of peace and success

[buttercup]

-acknowledging my stress and anxiety levels
-being protected from any petty stuff from ex j and his wife happening
-my new coat
-my red light therapy wand
-sleep
-being proactive
-my little heater
-ordering garbage bags
-ordering cat litter
-the friendly neighbor chatting with me recently who likes my cats
-my sense of style
-brushing my hair
-bring 99% sure I found out who sent me prank the prank calls in july
-klonopin
-semi detoxing from anxiety meds and cosmetic injections
-working out my body
-sending out emails for work
-blankets
-watching movies, TV shows, documentaries
-having great taste
-having a plan
-the feeling of clean clothes
-talking to my cats
-my determination levels rising
-hot beverages
-music
-finding special old messages between r and I and the irony reading them and processing the specialness that was there
-when my clothes feel looser
-my hair color
-looking so young
-being beautiful
-working on bettering myself as a person
-bread
-something to grow from
-humility
-that my ex j's wife took down her pinned post with awful things about from being pinned
-staying strong
-being smart
-perspective
-drinking water
-paper towels
-baby wipes