GRATITUDE LIST

[buttercup]

-music
-the conversation with RC the other day. he is my current muse
-the jager shirt i've been wearing today
-seeing the law of attraction as weird and now always believing in it
-art
-creativity
-protein drink M made
-drinking more water
-deciding based on what doctor said to get some blood tests done
-love
-the hickey l gave me
-my room getting started painting
-cleaning the yard and raking under the front porch today
-naps
-friends to talk to
-my new yoga pants i got in the mail
-getting a preview of interview questions for tomorrow and making some notes on them so im prepared for tomorrow
-cleaning and orgranizing half my closet
-TV episodes online
-lorazapam
-taking things one day at a time
-my new fb profile pic and how perfect it is
-that B still didnt delete me from fb
-water
-pinterest
-peanut butter cookies
-coca cola
-naps
-cuddle time with T kitten
-my outdoor cats
-being intelligent
-getting some studying done
-my new christian dior eye cream
-looking young
-my accomplishments
-having a voice
-my phone
-my confidence growing
-my vibe growing
-staying strong
-adding money to my savings
-catching up on reading today
-inspiration
-motivation

[buttercup]

-TV episodes online
-honoring my feelings
-rags
-hot guys
-kissing
-people to text
-having all my teeth fixed
-buying myself something from agent provocateur on sale
-my interview today going well
-having a ride to work tomorrow
-lorazapam
-coffee
-staying more in the moment
-high vibes
-not believing something if it doesn't feel right
-my new gray bedroom walls
-cats
-cuddling with T kitten
-my desires
-how much i've upgraded my wardrobe in the last year
-getting my certificate for the course i was studying for the last week
-bananas
-the hickey l gave me. so cute.
-finally having had sex for the first time in 3 years.i really think this is forward movement for me
-prayer
-my heart chakra spray
-my bed
-my beauty products
-my escentric 02 perfume
-doing some reading
-feeling upbeat
-warmth
-adding money to my savings
-doing some reading
-my intelligence
-doing some rebounding
-getting a new article up on 2nd business career
-all the offers and opportunities coming
-feeling so much more confident and assertive and calm ever since being on lorazapam
-blankets
-my beauty
-music
-pinterest
-social media
-having a normal conversation with RC the other day
-inspiration
-getting more work done on article i'm doing
-some upcoming content coming up for 2nd business
-biotene
-my phone
-listening to some upbeat talks on youtube today
-friends to chat with on facebook
-compliments
-M making me protein shakes
-having nice hair
-art

[buttercup]

-i worked today and got a ride to work
-iced almond milk hazelnut lattee
-my strength
-B and I made up. He apologized. Made me feel like a winner.
-my beauty
-all my tearsheets
-when B calls me beautiful
-B following me back on ig
-meditation
-comfortable clothes
-cuddle time with T kitten
-getting the lingerie i ordered in the mail today
-lorazapam
-sending peace messages/emails to several people and all pleasant positive results back
-feeling more confident
-adding some people from my past to fb
-feeling really in sync with B when we were talking
-my new gray walls
-nice long naps
-my interview going well yesterday
-confirming a lot of jobs today
-coca cola
-eating a lot less calories lately
-seeing my weight go down little by little
-my bed
-deep cleansing breaths
-TV episodes online
-cleaning out my closet some more and throwing more things away
-makeup
-finishing up my book i was reading
-having nice hair
-M making me a protein drink again
-yoga
-my style
-updating my list of intentions
-water
-prayer
-high vibes
-my new christian dior eye cream making my eyes look really young
-feeling connected
-forgiveness
-my phone
-social media
-art
-entertainment
-inspiration

[buttercup]

-working today
-feeling relaxed and content
-lots of confirmed jobs coming in
-2 dates this week. A photographer i worked with before who is really hot matched with me on bumble
-that B and I are talking again
-TV episodes online
-my new gray walls and how soothing it is
-getting a ride to work today
-lorazapam
-iced hazelnut almond milk latte with extra sugar
-pillows
-rags
-fixing my eyebrows
-having great skin
-compliments
-losing weight
-being flirted with
-being in magazines
-the latest article i wrote getting compliments from the band
-cuddle time with T kitten
-cleaning up the room a bit
-space
-naps
-having possible design interns now
-having nice curves
-black leggings
-coca cola
-chocolate
-having positive dreams
-life having some movement
-forgiveness
-healing
-peace
-iced water
-spiced beyond chicken buffalo wings from whole foods
-stretches
-makeup
-body being sore
-christian dior eye cream
-blankets
-charisma
-heels
-taking things one day at a time
-smiling
-beauty
-my phone
-all my outdoor cats

[buttercup]

-nourishment
-having a little fun at my job
-self care
-being liked
-helping a mouse to be saved at work today
-my style
-compliments
-being called beautiful
-being told i have a beautiful smile
-mustard
-my lips
-my teeth
-lots of cuddle time with T kitten today and getting some really cute pics of him
-ice cold water
-food
-seeing ex best friend in his car(gf with him) and not even getting bothered and staying on the stairs while he stayed where he was parked waiting for stuff from his parents. i am growing and no longer letting him have power over me or her
-holding W cat
-how soft H cat's fur has been
-M's husband getting a porch light finally
-socks
-TV episodes online
-my new gray walls
-the wind
-how good my skin has been looking
-weight going down and m's husband agreeing
-yoga pants
-newness
-having 2 dates this week
-my be
-how pretty mom cat is
-doing a little studying
-doing a little reading
-lorazapam
-another work contact from the past contacting me online today
-doing some reflecting on this last year in my journal
-smiling
-laughing
-being appreciated
-night skies
-quiet
-nice weather today
-makeup
-sunglasses
-rest
-my christian dior eye cream
-M's husband bringing me to work
-uber
-physical exercise
-massage
-calm
-surrender
-acceptance
-taking things one day at a time
-gin gins
-decluttering the closet some more
-my cactus flower face mist
-aloe vera gel
-lights off
-all the forward movement lately

[buttercup]

-rest
-reflection and growth
-my new gray walls
-supposed to be meeting B tomorrow
-pictures
-adding more money to my savings
-cozy feelings
-cuddle time with T kitten
-hot guys
-feeling my feelings
-decluttering the closet some more
-M's husband bringing me some really good donuts
-rebounding today
-music
-physical exercise
-peace
-forgiveness
-healing
-doing some reading today
-breaks
-doing some studying today
-meditation
-coca cola
-how nice the neighbors were tohold the package for me when no one heard the door for something i've been waiting for
-people to text with me and message
-bumble app
-aloe vera gel
-homeopathic remedies
-confirming more hours for this weekend of work
-getting a new graphic design intern and new graphic teaser image which was the highlight of my day for 2nd business
-appreciation
-seeing things i've wanted to grow,grow
-TV episodes online
-being easy on myself
-stomach getting flatter and more sculpted
-eye stretches
-calmness
-my stomach starting to feel better
-kindness
-eye stretches
-lorazapam
-new clothes
-new beauty products
-blankets
-love
-the new porch light
-motivation
-stretches
-my christian dior eye cream
-dimmer lights
-my ambition
-biotene
-the supplements i take

[susan]

Please be careful with the Lorazapan Buttercup. I'm not medically trained to be able to give advice and I'm sure you have been professionally advised, but I just want to say to be careful. It seems to be one of those tablets that could cause dependency or so I read. Just saying so you can be aware if you weren't already.

[buttercup]

Please be careful with the Lorazapan Buttercup. I'm not medically trained to be able to give advice and I'm sure you have been professionally advised, but I just want to say to be careful. It seems to be one of those tablets that could cause dependency or so I read. Just saying so you can be aware if you weren't already.

It's been great so far.

[buttercup]

today's been a bit of a bummer. it's already summer. i met up with B yesterday. It went nice. We vibed. Afterwards,he said he is very attracted to me but thinks we arent compatible and should be friends. it literally makes no sense since he said chemistry is more important to him before.i think there's something else. he looked younger,and cuter in person and like a soft-hearted type. It's too bad. We were very polite to each other and everything. Afterwards,when he said what he said i stayed polite and wished him luck in finding his right person. I just cant help but feel maybe he is pushing me away. He seemed bummed too,i think saying he is just going to start focusing more on work. I think i am,too. Another bummer is,the guy G i was going to have a date with tomorrow looks like it may not pan out,he gave me his home address when i said where are we meeting and i said i don't hook up with guys i hardly know and no response yet and it's been hours. Ugh. But,at least i'm making progress and getting out there. Two dates in 2 weeks after not a single date in like a year.I need to trust the process and let it all unfold.
-that my room is finally finished
-mysteriously having more money in my account
-biotene
-relaxing music
-cuddle time with T kitten
-my outdoor cats
-my beauty
-nourishment
-iced water
-connection
-booking another job for primary career. maybe i am on my path to my goal of "becoming famous."
-lorazapam
-sleep
-newness
-TV episodes online to watch
-getting a check in the mail today
-cold coca cola
-M's husband talking to me when i felt sad today
-M's husband bringing me a donut for breakfast
-M's husband being nice to me today
-becoming more self sufficient but realizing there is still some agoraphobia there
-my therapist agreeing to write a letter that i can only work part time right now
-buying myself an om tank top and bach flower remedy to cheer myself up
-feeling almost ready to exit my gray phase i've been in
-beyond meat plant based burgers
-my phone
-my stomach starting to feel better
-night skies
-goals
-motivation
-doing some more reading today
-doing some more studying today
-reconnecting with people from the past
-faith
-hope
-getting another mental influence book in the mail i ordered
-music
-that im trying
-that i am making progress
-therapy yesterday
-compliments that i'm glowing from all the awesome skincare products i've been using
-compliments on my hair
-makeup
-my style
-great uber rates
-uber
-my gucci slides
-sportsbras
-my glitter slides
-cuteness
-self compassion

[buttercup]

-my strength. it's been a bummer of a week but i'm getting through
-protein drinks
-beyond meat vegan burgers with mustard
-nausea going away
-cuddle time with T kitten
-allowing myself to express my art and creativity
-TV episodes online
-cats
-sleep
-wearing my new yoga pants
-having nice hair
-focusing more on fitness and how good that feels
-lorazapam
-doing some reading
-doing some studying
-inspiration
-letting myself be more confident
-being easy on myself
-friend texting me today
-my beauty
-nice weather
-sunshine
-appreciation
-night skies
-getting a lot of work done yesterday
-self forgiveness
-taking things one day at a time
-aloe vera gel
-makeup
-hope
-my new bedroom walls
-my teeth being all bonded
-remembering intention manifesting
-my heart chakra spray
-art
-having nice hair