Half a year ago I've begun MAP program, reached part II, but unfortunately there were several obstacles on my path. On the one hand some life circumstances made it difficult for me to keep on, but now i realize that doubt and fears contributed much to resistance which made me stop. Never got a single conscious projection and i am going to have one. In spite of stopping following MAP, sometimes i did some energy work and made several exit attempts.
Several weeks ago I reestablished my intention to complete MAP and achieve conscious AP. I've started on week 6 in order to revise techniques used for projection. Now, I've reached week 8 - second week of part II.
I've got some troubles with my body reacting on rope technique. I feel tension rising especially in my forearms. I try to stay relaxed, do more trance work, but nevertheless I feel some kind of tension when I move my imaginable hands. It feels like if you focus your awareness entirely on arms and you start feeling heaviness in them. Sometimes, such tension appears in my hips. My arms always react with tension on external awareness actions, in which arms are involved. It is confusing. I do my best to ignore it, but it sometimes forces my awareness to return to body limits. If I stay focused more on maintaining body relaxed, it gets harder to do external body awareness actions, because I have to consciously monitor my body for tension occurrence to prevent it. Any advise how to overcome this?
Sometimes I perceive some kind of illumination change with my eyes. I know that we always perceive some portion of light with closed eyes, but intensity of illumination is changing through the course of work session. Change in perception is especially noticed while rising energy and stimulating primary centers. Several times I perceived powerful change in light perception. It felt like something flied over me covering light source for a moment, or like someone suddenly had turned the light off.