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20th March 2007, 01:25 AM
#3
Thanks much for your reply CF
That was indeed my feeling.. that I was holding onto my central channel. Honestly? I don't think I was doing much of anything before I became aware... I came aware, gripping onto the channel. I only caressed it after I became aware of it; I "came to awareness" basically just gripping on for dear life, it felt like. Perhaps I floated out, was consciously aware enough to realize that I was floating, and instinctively reached out to reanchor myself.
It had a very instinctive "Need to reach out and hold something" feeling, like the way you see baby monkeys clinging to mom while sleeping, or a sloth gripping a tree branch, maybe. It's just a very odd sensation to come to, realizing that you're holding onto something that feels external to yourself but rather (very possibly) is an internal part of yourself.
No after-effects... I think this episode was rather an after-effect in itself of just an increased amount of trance and energywork, as I become more aware of my astral body. I notice lately that when I wake up I spend a lot more time in that "inbetween" phase.
What I find fascinating is that it felt like my eyes were closed, but that I had a very "inner" awareness of what was in front of me... like visualizing things in a mental space... and rather than see the bar as it was... I saw the bar as it's best *representation* for how it felt in my hands. Just this dark metal pole in front of me in a gray, shapeless 3D space. Maybe if I had seen myself holding onto my own spine and floating above my body, I would have freaked out. The mind and Higher Self is so fascinating that way, how it sometimes protects us from things we are not ready to see quite yet.
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