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sash
31st March 2006, 04:54 PM
"To heal is to merge into resonance with love and truth."

As a result I believe others that interact with you also become healed, even if that interaction is not direct (but obviously this resonance will come out in direct interactions).

What are your thoughts on this and how to best accomplish it?

My first idea is to let go of judgment.

26th April 2006, 02:35 AM
"To heal is to merge into resonance with love and truth."

As a result I believe others that interact with you also become healed, even if that interaction is not direct (but obviously this resonance will come out in direct interactions).

What are your thoughts on this and how to best accomplish it?

My first idea is to let go of judgment.

I think that's huge. I'm finding it very challenging indeed. I see myself judging myself all over the place, which paves the way to judging others too. Maybe I'm confusing judgement for discernment?

Feels like discernment is non-emotional, whereas judgement is very tied to emotion? I find it very difficult - I am so used to being an emotionally driven person, and learned to assign value on an emotional continuum. You think you have the idea of dumping the 'good' vs. 'bad' mindset then you look at how you treat yourself. Man, that was an eye opener, make no mistake... (felt sort of hobbitish right then :) )

Seems to create a conflict within the self. You see the judgment seeping over and pervading your perception of the outside world/incoming information, meanwhile you're doing your HAL9000 impression over the conflict and then baby, something's gotta give!

That's my experience with this so far. Yikes.

Here's a little blurb I found:


Non - Judgement

To judge is to separate.

To judge is to hurt yourself.

To judge is to strengthen the ego.

To see things as they really are is the vision of the awakened one.

Treat others how you want to be treated

Judge others and you shalll be judged

Practise non -judgement,

'Today I will judge nothing, this will help me become still'

The logical reasoning behind non-judgement:

As soon as you judge someone you are saying that you are better or worse that that person / thing. You are saying something is good or bad.

You are analysing somebody / something based on your conditioned values and beliefs. You are assuming you are right.

Afterall you could be wrong (and often are).

Just say to yourself that that person is on their own path / journey.

JUST ACCEPT.

IT IS LIKE THIS NOW!!

'People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones'

Don't judge others, sort yourself out!

Likewise it follows that if somebody judges you, you should not get upset / angry / emotional / aggressive. Don't worry what they think. They have a different personality / view point now. They could be wrong. However they could be right so treat them with respect but don't get ego involved.

BE INDEPENDENT OF THE GOOD OPINION OF OTHERS

Lose the need for approval of others, lose the ego, the false self image.

'let the one without sin cast the first stone!!'

Use discernment instead of judgement



This leads me to think about what Tom posted about "As Above, So Below"


So the lower self, the conscious self, and the higher self are all related according to "as above, so below" and the phrase is a sort of map. Studying the relationship between the lower self and the conscious self to see how "above" extends "below" without being different from it would lead to a sort of map of where the higher self is. That higher self is already functioning and reaching down to elevate the conscious self the way the conscious self works to elevate the lower self. I'd ask what we can do consciously to speed up the process, but really, I think that is a part of it every time we meditate or do energy work.

The phrase "as above, so below" feels like a key to unlock a door somewhere. I suspect it has a specific application, and that knowing about the lock that this key fits into is more important than the actual key

Specifically, teaching the lower self. Bring the higher thoughts down, through the heart to the lower self, this is how one 'whitens oneself', or is that too judgmental a phrase, lol? Maybe this is how one raises thier vibration? Is this a more accurate view? They basically say the same thing, I see that, but the former seems more laden with potential emotional land-mines, if that makes any sense, depending upon the person, of course.

This is just a free flow. Love to hear more ideas. :)

26th April 2006, 03:02 AM
Nice post, Scymitar. I think that non-judgement is definitely the end goal. But, often, it is very productive to work through the strongest emotion that goes along with judging - anger. Working with clients, I see that pushing down the feelings of anger can cause a lot of inner turmoil and pain. I hold the space for them to express their anger, shed tears, pound on the chair, and anything that doesn't hurt them or someone else. This is particularly essential for victims of abuse. Most have spent a lifetime of repressing their anger and have not been able to move past the pain as a result. Once they feel "safe" to express that anger, they often go through a period of depression.

The stages that a person goes through to get to the place of acceptance and non-judgement are almost identical to Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's stages of dying and grief...denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. I believe this is true because I have seen it so many times. I seriously doubt that the average person is able to make the leap from anger to acceptance without some process going on in between. For true healing to occur, people need to feel it is ok to have the range of human emotions. Once they have moved through the stages, hopefully not remaining stuck in any of them, non-judgement becomes almost a given. They learn to view what has happened to them in a more detached way, thus allowing non-judgement...which is the goal that we all should strive for.

26th April 2006, 03:24 AM
I get the impression a lot of that anger is born of fear. My anger issue is not terrible, my fear issues are a bit of a beast, however; fear of emotional pain, fear of being judged (which feeds your desire to judge others/situations), etc.

Some time has been spent on anger, however, fear seems to have been safely avoided, until lately. But, I could be wrong and will look at my anger again.

Thanks for your thoughts PHG. I can relate to what you said about how important it is to be OK with myself for feeling what I'm feeling. I suspect this is part of the conflict - yet another judgement issue.

26th April 2006, 03:41 AM
The stages that a person goes through to get to the place of acceptance and non-judgement are almost identical to Elizabeth Kubler Ross's stages of dying and grief...denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. I believe this is true because I have seen it so many times.

Seems like maybe there is something to this, as I believe part of getting to a space of non-judgment has something to do with a kind of death, the death/transformation of the ego. Not death as in ceasing to exist, rather the negative aspects changing?

I'm totally diggin' on your idea about non-judgement of past trauma aiding the ability to look without in non-judgement as well.

Dsmoke
28th April 2006, 12:01 PM
I think judgement is evolutionary. We are always searching for patterns that will indicate when we are right. It's practical - primitive people needed to be able to judge the usefulness of certain plants, for instance. But psychologically, humans take it to extremes that are no longer helpful, hoping that if we can assign everything a value, we will never be unpleasantly surprised again and can feel confident that if we think something is good or right, then it really is. Unfortunately that kind of thinking is rigid and counterproductive.

As for the healing, I do believe that you can heal people around you without even trying. Have you ever been in the presence of someone who was totally at peace with themselves? They accept you just as you are, the world just as it is, and yet they are still radiating peace and joy. Just being around them is inspiring and makes you feel good, and you aspire to find that peace for yourself. That is a form of healing.

mick
28th April 2006, 02:55 PM
I think judgement is evolutionary. We are always searching for patterns that will indicate when we are right. It's practical - primitive people needed to be able to judge the usefulness of certain plants, for instance. But psychologically, humans take it to extremes that are no longer helpful, hoping that if we can assign everything a value, we will never be unpleasantly surprised again and can feel confident that if we think something is good or right, then it really is. Unfortunately that kind of thinking is rigid and counterproductive.
Interesting and powerful point plus how the role of observation and analysis by the early people remodelled their lives. Also if I might add to your observations the role of 'self' in such 'modern' thinking. :)


As for the healing, I do believe that you can heal people around you without even trying. Have you ever been in the presence of someone who was totally at peace with themselves? They accept you just as you are, the world just as it is, and yet they are still radiating peace and joy. Just being around them is inspiring and makes you feel good, and you aspire to find that peace for yourself. That is a form of healing.
I think that the desire to heal those around one can have value, perhaps as a conditioning of the immediate environment in which they grow. But the choice to heal others is I think somewhat of a judgement call in itself :) and also possibly an intrusion if not requested. They may be happy with their state, it may be a state that they know and providing a platform from which they are making their own way. Did someone mention 'free will'. :) To your observation re. those that are at peace with themselves, yes and I think a key here is that in being as such they provide a simple space for themselves and in doing so minimalise imposing on others space leaving others the opportunity to do likewise (ideally but alas not always, judgements again :) ).

28th April 2006, 03:05 PM
I think judgement is evolutionary. We are always searching for patterns that will indicate when we are right. It's practical - primitive people needed to be able to judge the usefulness of certain plants, for instance. But psychologically, humans take it to extremes that are no longer helpful, hoping that if we can assign everything a value, we will never be unpleasantly surprised again and can feel confident that if we think something is good or right, then it really is. Unfortunately that kind of thinking is rigid and counterproductive.
Interesting and powerful point plus how the role of observation and analysis by the early people remodelled their lives. Also if I might add to your observations the role of 'self' in such 'modern' thinking. :)

This is where I see the distinction between discernment and judgement. Discerning is based on observation and analysis - judgement creeps in attempts to assign 'good' / 'bad'. For example, a poisonous plant may be found to be poisonous through discernment, but then judgement creeps in and it becomes 'evil'.

mick
28th April 2006, 03:21 PM
This is where I see the distinction between discernment and judgement. Discerning is based on observation and analysis - judgement creeps in attempts to assign 'good' / 'bad'. For example, a poisonous plant may be found to be poisonous through discernment, but then judgement creeps in and it becomes 'evil'.
A nice discernment. :)

28th April 2006, 05:25 PM
Scymitar said:

This is where I see the distinction between discernment and judgement. Discerning is based on observation and analysis - judgement creeps in attempts to assign 'good' / 'bad'. For example, a poisonous plant may be found to be poisonous through discernment, but then judgement creeps in and it becomes 'evil'.
Really good distinction, Scy. Going back to the idea of allowing people to feel the range of their emotions so they can move through them to healing...this is where trying not to "assign 'good'/'bad'" comes in. By judging someone else who is trying to work through their process, we are telling them they are "bad" for having those feelings. Maybe the feelings (anger, etc.) could be discerned to be inappropriate for someone to hold on to for long periods of time, but appropriate for the short term as they are working through them. This does not make the person "bad" for having the feelings, but it's helpful for them to see (discern) that these feelings are not helpful for them to be stuck in. At some point, for the sake of their healing, people need to be able to move past those inappropriate feelings, hopefully to reach the goal of non-judgement...of themselves and others.

kayelsee
8th May 2006, 07:57 PM
Do you mean to heal, or to be healed?

Discernment, which is a form of judgement, is an important survival skill in all areas of life: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual.

Being open, nonjudgementally (without discernment) to all things, whether recieving or giving, is to have no boundaries.

Appropriate boundaries are about valuing self and the self of others.

Beware becoming emotionally or psychically invested in transmuting or transforming negative energy, whether it is yours or someone else's. If you are not strong enough to balance negative energy in your own ego or psyche, than you can do yourself and/or the other a deep disservice.

What sounds wonderful and beautiful in theory, is far from so to often in fact. If you end up being the transformative vehicle for negative energy you're trying to heal, and you don't understand it, you will most likely hurting yourself and/or the other unnecessarily.

Beware of what you invite.


Kristen

OneLoveOneLight
11th June 2006, 07:02 AM
My healing is done by placing my hand on the person, I begin to feel a growing coldness under my clothes near the waist area and my hand also becomes cold. In acctuality I'm very hot in those areas!

11th June 2006, 06:16 PM
kayelsee said:
Being open, nonjudgementally (without discernment) to all things, whether recieving or giving, is to have no boundaries.
I disagree with this statement in that I believe it is possible to be non-judgemental towards someone you are helping to heal and still maintain your own healthy boundaries. Maybe we are using the definitions differently.

The goal of healing and personal evolvement is to grow to a point of accepting and loving all things. This means that we no longer tag anything with the titles of "good" or "bad". We are still able to "discern" a difference, but make no "judgement" or condemnation of another's or our own actions. Complete love involves complete acceptance.

daem0n
11th June 2006, 10:24 PM
my 2 cents
we judge because we were judged in the past, and we try to take our sweet revenge on subconscious level
to stop judging stop allowing oneself to be judged and give away your power to some ekhm
just because almost all activities are labelled and judged it doesn't mean it isn't artificial and sick
anyone who is not loving and supportive is mentally ill, treat them kindly and watch your toes ;)
take care

sash
12th June 2006, 04:55 AM
Well regarding kayelsee's post, if you merge with love and truth what remains to be feared?
Judgment is fear. However fear cannot exist in the presence of love. Love brings understanding.

Judgment is something that you stop to do, to manifest in a certain way based on interpretation, it is not letting go at all, it is holding on.

Discernment for me is understanding, for some it is judgment I suppose. Understanding is all that is needed though. When we love with awareness we understand. If we understand why would we need to judge?