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fialiten
10th March 2011, 08:03 PM
Hello!

My name is Sofia, I'm 23 years old and from Sweden. I want to ask you about something that happens when I meditate. I can easily put myself in a very deep trance, where I feel like I almost completely "disappear". In this state, I truly believe that if I was to open my eyes, I wouldn't see nothing. I often break lose from this state in horror, if not my boyfriend comes to wake me up in time.
It is like some dark energy attacks me somehow. If I partly expect this, it isn't as bad as when I don't. If I meditate with the idea of reaching a calm feeling, this "dark energy" (in lack of things to call it) gets stronger and I get more overpowered. If I get afraid, it will just run right over me and I will come out of this state with a total panic attack, feeling helpless and not knowing what to do to "ever" feel alright again.

Definition of the this dark energy: When I put myself in trance (or at least a deep meditative slumber), there comes a very compact and thick darkness/light/energy. It is like a wall which its me and presses up towards my eyes. My eyes then starts to vibrate EVERY time. If I go through it, I lose all my sense of room and space. I don't know what is going to happen or happens. Therefore I wonder if this actually can be dangerous?

Afterwards: I feel all lost. Like I'm going to collapse. I feel like I can at any point be overtaken by some unknown force and become evil or controlled.
I really wish to point out that I want to know "what" this could be, because it is definitely not something I create by reaching this state; it is something "I meet".

I hope you have an idea of this, because it truly destroys the purpose of meditation for me, and it is something I love.

Yours truly/Sofia

CFTraveler
10th March 2011, 08:25 PM
Hi Sofia. I am making a copy of this post and putting it into the Down Under Forum, because this phenomenon, which can be called 3D Black, Void, or just "Blackness", is not uncommon when you get into a deep enough trance.
This post will describe it somewhat:
viewtopic.php?f=23&t=11746&p=89625#p89625 (http://forums.astraldynamics.com/viewtopic.php?f=23&t=11746&p=89625#p89625)
It's an in-between astral scape, and many of us like it.

fialiten
10th March 2011, 11:12 PM
Hi!

Thank you so very much for such a quick and good reply!
Is it common to get this mind overwhelming nausea?
Like someone forced you to solve a thousand math problems
when all you want to do is sleep!

Thank you very much/Sofia

CFTraveler
11th March 2011, 12:17 AM
The only time I've had nausea while in meditative trance, it was from spinning. So I don't know...

Tutor
11th March 2011, 02:05 AM
Sofia,

at first sight...Black http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6X8Ic86Hx3w

"Let there be light..."

if you could imagine yourself singularly as an epic event BOOM, a star, shining endless light from within outward for ever and ever, yet all around you appears as darkness infinitely for ever and ever. you have no idea of your brilliant and blinding light, as it is you in and of yourself unseen by you. yet, all about in the infinite darkness there is life emerging because of your warming light that permeates the cold darkness. but neither does this darkness comprehend you as the great life giving light, no more than do you comprehend you, unless you just imagine to see that in your seeing this darkness then it must also be lit by you seeing that it might be seen et all. how otherwise would you know that it was darkness, if not that you as light could not see yourself in it? therefore, this darkness is your own light with 'lack' only of you as consciously aware reflection. so..., it is merely a matter of understanding that you are that light in this overwhelming darkness, and that it is you whom are the source of life for this cold darkness as your light permeates infinitely throughout it. thus, do not fear it as it no doubt fears you as well (reflection or lack of), merely exact that confidence which is yourself as the living giver of life. i cannot conceive of that which conceives my self, yet I may conceive my 'self', with courage in the stillness of silent darkness...I AM that I AM

I am my Beloved's and my Beloved is mine

let 'that' which is yours in the darkness be well met with you...the light, by and by and in and of and all in all

God Alone and You

That Thou Art or Thou Art That

tim

"I See then, 'that', through the shifting change, I remain at Heart, my Self, the Full Emptiness of the One Life, where You, Dear One, and I, are Forever Entwined in Infinite Love." Eakins

the sound of light weaving the warp and woof of life's colored tapestry as it rides the dark night:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kn369TSZ ... re=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kn369TSZ4QY&feature=related)

+ IHSOYS XPISTOS +

farewell2arms
11th March 2011, 07:37 AM
how otherwise would you know that it was darkness, if not that you as light could not see yourself in it?

Wow, that was beautiful, Tim. :)