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Irreantum
6th May 2006, 05:23 PM
Well I have just read Roberts book on “Practical Psychic Self-Defense” and have had trouble with the part on “core images”…

Not that I couldn’t find my core images, it is just that even before practicing his methods, my core images started showing up as I was reading about it. It seems that his methods of falling into a trance and so forth have come a bit naturally for me (as if I have practiced it many times before unknowingly…), but I have not further practiced them due to fear and not having enough knowledge about it quite yet. But beyond this, I have found that my main psychic attacker is my dad. I don’t know if he is doing it on purpose (I doubt it) but I have had some serious situations happen that have all been locked up in my core memory. Now I am having nightmares about him, and seeing him doing further things such as yelling at me, beating me, and some other serious things…

In Robert’s book he advised us to stay away from the one who is the center of our psychic attacks, but what if you can’t? What if you are in a situation where you have to look that person in the eye, give them a huge, and live with them everyday? Ever since I was little I always had serious pains or fears when he would come home and never really understood it, but now I do, so many things make sense now, it is just that I don’t know what to do. I still love my dad and forgiveness comes instantly for me and I don’t usually hold hard feelings, it is just it is quite difficult to live with the person who is giving you psychic attacks all the time.

I always feel like I am the bad son because I have never been quite able to open up to him (or any of my parents) and we don’t have a close relationship. There are times when we are able to find peace when we talk about the gospel and Jesus Christ, but our conversations there are limited because my thoughts on such aspects get quite deep and very few people like to discuss those things with me. I don’t wish to describe his character with me, but these psychic attacks sometime get pretty rough, what am I to do??? Please, any advice would be appreciated.

CFTraveler
6th May 2006, 06:01 PM
There are two ways to attack this problem, and maybe you can implement both. The first is bring whatever hidden issues to the surface and deal with them, and to try to come to a decision about them, and the other is psychic self protection.
I would recommend, when he is in a good mood and there are no bad feelings between you, to sit with him, and ask him something like this (I've generalized it):
" Lately I've been thinking that there is something missing about the relationship between you and I. I don't always feel good about opening up to you with my problems, thoughts and feelings, and quite put my finger on why. Is there something I should know, do you have any ideas?" This is nonconfrontational and he may have something to say to you- the thing with parents is that sometimes they pass away unexpectedly and you are left to deal with, not only your emotions, but unresolved issues, that sometimes even don't have anything to do with you, but affect you nonetheless. If he is scary and you can't bring yourself to do this, then you should write all your questions and concerns and put them away, for when you feel that you have to do it or use it to talk to someone else. There are groups to help with this type of relationships- Adult children of alcoholics, or codependents anonymous.

The second approach is shielding. You have to coexist with a psychic attacker, then try shielding- You will find posts about it around this topic, and there are many posters here that are quite knowledgeable about this.
Good luck and God Bless.

Irreantum
6th May 2006, 06:16 PM
Thanks for that... I have once come up to him and told him that I wanted to be a better son and that I felt that we didn't really have a relationship and that I wanted one. I bore my heart to him and told him how I felt, but then after that I asked him if he wanted to say anything and he said, "No, is that all you want to say?", I said, "Well do you have anything to say that could help.", he didn't say anything and got up and walked away. But I do fear him greatly... I have talked with a therapist woman before and she had shared with me that he is a "holic" (can’t spell), and she shared with me how to do meta-physics with the grounding, shielding, mind spaces, and all that stuff, so I guess I should continue doing that. Thanks for you advise!

6th May 2006, 07:12 PM
Hi Irreantum,
CF gave you some really good advice. I would add that it concerns me a little that you are so quick to forgive. Forgiveness is essential in the long run, but it's not wise or healthy to push any anger deep into yourself. It's OK to be angry, sad, mad, or any other feelings you may have. They DON"T make you a bad person. You aren't the "bad" son, it seems that your father is the one who has problems and issues.

There are a number of ways to release any anger or bad feelings. I wouldn't recommend releasing them on your dad. It might make the situation worse. Use a pillow and punch it, saying how angry you are. Find a friend that you can talk to about what is going on. A school counselor might be helpful, but be aware that depending on where you live, they may be required by law to report to police any abuse you tell them about. You might ask them first what they have to report before telling them anything. If you can't do any of these things, you might want to write out all of your deepest feelings and then destroy it or leave it in a safe place where your father can't find it.

Hopefully, some day your dad may come to realise that he is missing out on having a great relationship with you. Until that time comes, you must do everything you can to protect yourself...physically and emotionally. And, understand that forgiveness does not mean that you have to accept any kind of abuse.

Irreantum
7th May 2006, 05:10 PM
Yeah, I would say that is someone of my weakness. I am not too great at being mad, angry, or even sad. I have never really had a shoulder to cry on. How ever I do let me feelings out in prayers, but rarely do I share anger. Usually when I am upset I may write a song or write my feelings down as you have said, but I still seem to be quick to forgive. It is very hard for someone to offend me, but at the same time I am still very sensitive (if that makes any sense). When someone does hurt me I usually just pray about it and it rarely fazes me for long periods of time (and the things that do faze me I can do little or nothing about them and crying or letting out the pain never seems to help), but when you live with something that is constantly attacking you on emotional and spiritual level, it gets kind of painful and it wears on me a bit.

I want to move out soon but I would still like to leave in “peace” or try and create some kind of harmony, but I know there is little I can do, it just hurts that I am so easily blamed for everything. The worst thing he has gotten onto me for is staying on the computer too long, almost like he looks for ways to say that I am a bad son or person. It is kind of hard to know how to do something right when all you are told is how wrong you are and I am never really given an explanation as to why what I have done is wrong, accept for the fact that I am told not to do it. I could go on about further things that are more to the point, but yeah… not sure if this made any sense.

CFTraveler
7th May 2006, 07:39 PM
Irreantum wrote:
I want to move out soon but I would still like to leave in “peace” or try and create some kind of harmony, but I know there is little I can do, it just hurts that I am so easily blamed for everything. The worst thing he has gotten onto me for is staying on the computer too long, almost like he looks for ways to say that I am a bad son or person. It is kind of hard to know how to do something right when all you are told is how wrong you are and I am never really given an explanation as to why what I have done is wrong, accept for the fact that I am told not to do it. I could go on about further things that are more to the point, but yeah… not sure if this made any sense. It made perfect sense and I see you taking on the guilt that he is projecting onto you. You sound like a nice, nice person and it's possible that he can't communicate with you because of his own emotional inability- but just because he is incapable of a healthy relationship with you, doesn't mean that you have to accept responsibility for his behaviour. This is very important for whatever happens between you. Sometimes you can leave, and then months or years after you're not living in the same place you can be in a better position to try and understand what's up with him- but even if you do understand, try to realize that whatever damaged him it's NOT you- you are the innocent party in whatever is going on.

Irreantum
8th May 2006, 12:40 PM
Yeah, I think I may have found some of the reasons why my dad may be the way he is. One reason that I think really messed him up was when he went to Vietnam, he has also had a really hard life (this is his third marriage), and I am not sure what other things there could be…

I have really tried to understand him and I try and work with him when he gets upset (by staying quite and not holding offence to what he says), but at the same time the things he says are repeated over and over in my mind. I have had experiences where I heard something talking to me at night and it was saying these horrible things about me and to me and that if I didn’t give in to what it wanted me to do then I would suffer severe pain (it was specific about the pain). The next day that severe pain was caused by my dad and the things (I guess you could call it a “neg”) that the neg said to me were said to me by my dad (almost word for word). It makes things kind of hard. Well anyway thanks for your help and I hope to get through this.