frustrated attempting to focus

[IronGega]

I don't really understand this, there are times when I can focus just fine and other times (mostly) when I try to focus and I suddenly get all these rushes of emotions and negative thoughts.

I know it's normal to have this happen, and the the key is to let them pass by without getting involved but I gett involved often and when I start to refocus I can feel stress and frustration swelling up.

I'm trying to concnetrate to relax but it's like the more I do it the more I get tense and angery.

this isn't the complete problem atm I really dont know how to put this into words

[CFTraveler]

I'm trying to concnetrate to relax but it's like the more I do it the more I get tense and angery. Relaxation is not something you do, making an effort to relax is the opposite of what you want to do.
Focusing on something is good to maintain one-pointedness, but relaxation is not an object of meditation, is what you do before you meditate.
Try something like progressive muscle stimulation for physical relaxation, breathwork, for mental relaxation, and observing yourself is an excellent method to eliminate mind chatter. But if you can't stop it, don't try it- just observe your thoughts.

[IronGega]

I was too out of it to put my thoughts out properly.

I was focusing on my breath as part of my meditation, but I kept getting bombarded by thoughts and past conflicts. I did my best to not get caught up in them but my body seemed to get tense and tense.

this has been happening alot since I was attempting to focus on my breath to allow myself to relax, I try not to worry about being calm or what not.

I just don't know whats going on, I was reading about deep breathing exercises, how they help you focus better and relax more. but once I started doing them it's like my body was trying to fight me. like it wouldn't allow me to get a full breath

I was putting my attention on my breath to allow myself to relax, I wasn't forcing myself to relax. but as I practice focusing im hit with all of these emotions and thoughts

[IronGega]

I realized something.

I was reading Astral dynamics the section about taming the mind. Rob does mention about how thought coming back in can cause frustration as thought will want to pop back in, He also mentions how mental effot (attempting to focus) can cause physical tension, something I've been experiencing latly.

I've also noticed that once I "drop my guard" so to speak, when the thoughts and emotions pop back up and I get caught up in them, this is the time when I have to start all over.

seems it's a process of quieting my mind and keeping it that way

[heliac]

Hi IronGega,

A couple things that i have found that have worked a little with this.
When thoughts keep popping up it may help to acknowledge and allow them to occur then gradually introduce counting your breath. When you start counting your breath thoughts will pop back in but you may start to notice moments of quiet between thoughts, if you can gently focus on allowing the duration of the moments between thoughts to increase that may help a little.

[BDeye]

Hi IronGega.

I'm seeming to have difficulty with everything lately whether it be meditation, physical relaxation or projection. I've notice that a lot of the thoughts and impressions I'm bombarded with are real world issues I'm dealing with, some are just run of the mill thought babble though. What I've started practicing is to identify the difference between the two. If it's a real world problem I try to deal with it as best I can and if it is something I can't change, I try make my peace with it(sometimes very hard to do). The thought babble I find easier to deal with, mind taming exercises work for me. I have also found exercising before a session really helps the overall effect (yoga, swimming, a quick jog). I'm giving this advice from a position of sympathy seeing that I'm having to relearn everything:roll:.

Hope this helps, Keep well.
B.

[CFTraveler]

Here is something that I have found helps- it may be a little weird and different but what the heck so am I.
If you have all these real-world thoughts (and lately, so have I, it's been a challenging week), do a mental note of them- visualize that you are making a list, and writing out the items in order of importance- or do two lists, the 'important' ones and the 'mundane' ones. Then imagine you are burning the unimportant one, and take the important one, fold it, put it in an imaginary envelope marked 'for later', and set it aside, and promise yourself you will deal with them later. Then go back to your desired practice.
If this doesn't work, instead of focusing on the breath, observe yourself as you focus on the breath, without judgement. Something like, "look at IG, focusing on his breath"; "look at IG having stray thoughts". Simple observation, no judgement or comment. This helps me, immensely.

[ButterflyWoman]

Just a comment. Frustration is an emotion, too.

[IronGega]

Hi IronGega.

I'm seeming to have difficulty with everything lately whether it be meditation, physical relaxation or projection. I've notice that a lot of the thoughts and impressions I'm bombarded with are real world issues I'm dealing with, some are just run of the mill thought babble though. What I've started practicing is to identify the difference between the two. If it's a real world problem I try to deal with it as best I can and if it is something I can't change, I try make my peace with it(sometimes very hard to do). The thought babble I find easier to deal with, mind taming exercises work for me. I have also found exercising before a session really helps the overall effect (yoga, swimming, a quick jog). I'm giving this advice from a position of sympathy seeing that I'm having to relearn everything:roll:.

Hope this helps, Keep well.
B.

acually I have noticed that myself, after I do abit of a workout, nothing major just enough to get the blood pumping, it's easier for me to focus

[BDeye]

What I enjoy about the yoga is that it feels like a moving meditation and sets me up quite nicely for my sitting session. I'm still a novice with the practice of yoga and still find my mind wandering a bit (highly active imagination:shrug:). The last exit I managed came from after a comfortable yoga session though:clap:.

Another thing I've found that may help is stopping a session when I feel an interruption (internal or external), I then get up, have a wander around and go straight back in. The sessions seem to build up progressively until I am able to sit for a few hours. I still find the interruptions occur, although I deal with them in a calmer fashion. This technique might not be the best for building up the will power necessary to sit through a session come hell or high water, it can help when I'm feeling less than focused though. Often when I force myself to sit through an uncomfortable session I just come away feeling tired and aggravated. That ten or fifteen minute break can sometimes give me the second wind I needed. I sometimes do this two or three times before I find my footing.

This may or may not be for everyone, it's only something I'm experimenting with, if it helps cool.

[heliac]

Another thing I've found that may help is stopping a session when I feel an interruption (internal or external), I then get up, have a wander around and go straight back in. The sessions seem to build up progressively until I am able to sit for a few hours. I still find the interruptions occur, although I deal with them in a calmer fashion. This technique might not be the best for building up the will power necessary to sit through a session come hell or high water, it can help when I'm feeling less than focused though. Often when I force myself to sit through an uncomfortable session I just come away feeling tired and aggravated. That ten or fifteen minute break can sometimes give me the second wind I needed. I sometimes do this two or three times before I find my footing.

This may or may not be for everyone, it's only something I'm experimenting with, if it helps cool.

I think that is something great to try. A comment about the interruptions. Some observations i've made that i have found others experience as well. When first sitting down there seems to be a natural progression to how the brain initially handles meditation sessions.

Right off the bat it may start thinking of random stuff ie. i need to do laundry tomorrow morning. It will also start going over your day and re-introduce things that bothered you and things that you did great at or that occurred to you that made you feel good. I think when you notice these events happening to see it as a natural part of the process and allow it to happen can help.
I think it is a part of the clearing process, trying to calm the tension with frustration will not feel good at all. A lot of the material on meditation(especially dogmatic buddhist texts) can come off a little harsh on thoughts. You may have read somewhere that thoughts are the enemy or are like a virus or demonized as an aspect of the "ego". Adopting these type of beliefs provide a platform for frustration when thoughts appear as a natural part of the process of clearing your head.

If you have found in some way you have adopted this idea that thoughts are the "enemy" perhaps try letting that go.Allowing yourself to think about "me" and letting your brain get some stuff done about "you" usually will open things up for the bigger picture.

[SoulSail]

Also, keep in mind that the human brain is accustomed to moving at a certain speed all day. It likes to keep busy and does so on its own fairly well. And when you're ready for it to slow down to single task, agitation and frustration are just natural side-effects. In traditional forms of meditation we almost always start by focusing on an object (candle flame, breath, sound in ears) so our brain has a little toy to work with and doesn't throw a fit on us. It may have been stated already, but when you go to focus, it's very helpful to find a single body movement (breath or motion of abdomen while breathing) and stay with it. If that doesn't work and you still find yourself getting frustrated, up and sensory value of the object to something like counting up or a mantra. And like CFT mention, note distracting feelings and thoughts as well. Very important.


"You can’t examine something fully if you are busy rejecting its existence. Whatever experience we may be having, mindfulness just accepts it. It is simply another of life’s occurrences, just another thing to be aware of. No pride, no shame, nothing personal at stake—what is there is there."

And one more, because this one is so very true about developing concentration or stable meditation:

"Somewhere in this process, you will come face to face with the sudden and shocking realization that you are completely crazy. Your mind is a shrieking, gibbering madhouse on wheels barreling pell-mell down the hill, utterly out of control and helpless. No problem. You are not crazier than you were yesterday. It has always been this way, and you just never noticed. You are also no crazier than everybody else around you. The only real difference is that you have confronted the situation; they have not. So they still feel relatively comfortable. That does not mean that they are better off. Ignorance may be bliss, but it does not lead to liberation. So don’t let this realization unsettle you. It is a milestone actually, a sign of real progress. The very fact that you have looked at the problem straight in the eye means that you are on your way up and out of it."

Gunaratana, Bhante (2011-09-06). Mindfulness in Plain English



Soul

[BDeye]

I think that is something great to try. A comment about the interruptions. Some observations i've made that i have found others experience as well. When first sitting down there seems to be a natural progression to how the brain initially handles meditation sessions.

I seem to notice this as well, I find I get to a point where I haven't stopped the thoughts but experience a sensation of rising above them. I still feel them all going on but I don't get caught up by them. The sensation very much feels like standing on top of a skyscraper looking down at the traffic, I'm still aware that it's going on but no longer caught up in the flow.

I tend to use the breaks more as a way to step away from the frustration than the actual interruptions. I feel these session should be enjoyable, to degree, and if I find my self sitting there all wound up because I'm not unwinding then I'm the problem not the distraction. It's all good though, all a learning experience and often the lessons learned are rewarding beyond measure, transferring into many aspects of my life. So I just try make sure that I'm enjoying myself and keep exploring other avenues of experiencing awareness or how far that awareness can reach.

[Tutor]

Breathe: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CIkk2icOpHQ

[heliac]

I seem to notice this as well, I find I get to a point where I haven't stopped the thoughts but experience a sensation of rising above them. I still feel them all going on but I don't get caught up by them. The sensation very much feels like standing on top of a skyscraper looking down at the traffic, I'm still aware that it's going on but no longer caught up in the flow.

Same here. After sitting for a little while the rising above sensation is a sign post telling me one of the first major layers of tension peeling away. When i first started feeling this i would stop and look around, which was kind of cool but then realized that there are many many more layers to go through. The birds eye view is one of the first signs of letting go of who you are, the more tension that is leveled out the more letting go occurs. Note that something else i've noticed is during this letting go process, the idea of letting go can become a crutch to actually letting go. Letting go of letting go is what it feels like once it happens. I guess that sounds kind of contradictory, but ya...:)


I tend to use the breaks more as a way to step away from the frustration than the actual interruptions. I feel these session should be enjoyable, to degree, and if I find my self sitting there all wound up because I'm not unwinding then I'm the problem not the distraction. It's all good though, all a learning experience and often the lessons learned are rewarding beyond measure, transferring into many aspects of my life. So I just try make sure that I'm enjoying myself and keep exploring other avenues of experiencing awareness or how far that awareness can reach.

Sounds like you have a great attitude about it :D

[eyeoneblack]

There came and still comes a point - say 20 minutes in - that the chatter of thoughts running through my brain are still there, but I don't react in any intellectual or emotional way - kinda' like a fly that doesn't bother you. They just come, Nevermind, and go.

Eventually I'll get caught up in a dream like state, focused on what the images and imagination - I think? what the higher self has on ITS mind. What does it want to tell me?

At this point I regret that it must end - that I can't keep it forever.

[BDeye]

There came and still comes a point - say 20 minutes in - that the chatter of thoughts running through my brain are still there, but I don't react in any intellectual or emotional way - kinda' like a fly that doesn't bother you. They just come, Nevermind, and go.

Yep, doesn't always happen my first session, but I'm working on it.


Eventually I'll get caught up in a dream like state, focused on what the images and imagination - I think? what the higher self has on ITS mind. What does it want to tell me?

Here again the same. Two things happen though, one I loose all objectivity and get carried with the dreamlet, or if I'm lucky I am able to watch the scenario from the outside. I try for this, so as to glean as much info from these little scenes as possible. Though they can very so much in nature and content, that often I'll get hooked by the oddest thing, any of the senses can be dragged into the dreamlet (enjoyable all the same:-)). Quite often I try pay as close attention to my reaction to what I'm perceiving as the perception itself. If it fills me with joy or anger, I try tie that into the interpretation. you got to admit it's fun though:clap:.

[eyeoneblack]

Yes it is.

Eventually you'll find that your daily life takes on a meditative mode; you don't mind waiting, or driving - or just the inconveniences of living in a chaotic world. I sit just sit back an observe the people around me doing there neccessary or silly or stupid stuff.

There's no hurry in my world.

[heliac]

Hi IronGega,

A couple things that i have found that have worked a little with this.
When thoughts keep popping up it may help to acknowledge and allow them to occur then gradually introduce counting your breath. When you start counting your breath thoughts will pop back in but you may start to notice moments of quiet between thoughts, if you can gently focus on allowing the duration of the moments between thoughts to increase that may help a little.

A friend of mine sent me this today and it reminded me of noticing the moments between thoughts in this thread.
http://i.imgur.com/Xkt8Cno.jpg