IA´s dream diary....

In last night Dream I Dream about an ex bf in the Dream we seamed to be togeather or the Dream was from that time...(I am working on lesson 5 in the book A Course in Miracles, "I am never upset for the reason I Think") ...this has to be said becuse I was aware in the Dream about this lesson...so the Dream was like this: I have wardrobe in the hall (I do not have this in real Life and I do not remember what appartament I have had on in the hall, maybe it is in the future?)...so he had the wardrobe dorr open and when I passed by him he turned around and had one pair of my knickers and smelling on them...but he dropped one pair of knickers what was not mine...here I started to Think how should I react...should I comfront him about the knickers what are not mine and how he has them...should I just go along what the situation tells me and trust on my guts....so these thoughts was on going in my mind when I hear myself say...WHOs knickers are these...I did at once feel Deep fear and I did go fast to the bathroom and closed the door...my heart was raising to a high uncofortabel level...and I said to myself....I want out from here....I want back home....(so maybe this was not my appartament but his?? but this ex bf did not have a wardrobe in the hall in his appartament)...here I awoke myself, it was too intence....

In my Dream last night I was tested of my trust on my son....he did pass the test :-)...or that I have not lost my trust upon him :-)

In last night dream I was living on a camping area with many houses...I heard that a big accident has happened and now everyone would be interrogated...I went out on a road and all car´s was stopped for the interrogation...there is several women officers but they have hard time to get the male drivers to stop at theire command...I see a car turnoround and drive away...so I take my bike and for to see where is it driving...they have to stop at the red light...so I catch up on them...and I tell them that if they drive away they will be suspected to have something to do with the happening at the camping...so I over talk them to come back for the interrogation..and I succeed...but I do memorize the license plate incase they will drive away and not return for the interrogation....

I woke up this morning from my dream when I hear myself say...How long time will it take to raise a man??...and I hear like 75...and I go...what...hour...day´s....minutes....and now when I hear my thoughts go like this...I get so scared so I let my self out of it and start to analyse...did I follow a written instructions...or a hearing instructions...I did become very unsure and I was thinking...for what reason did these instructions given to me....who did it...and for what...if not for more reason...it was very talkative that when thinking comes in the mind...you start to analyse and then the doubt invaded me...and I really could see the difference...by just doing it and when start to think...I did need a reason why I am doing it....but what I understand is..that many things can be done if you just do it...but then when it come´s to cause and effect it is here the difference is made...there will be consequenses...so here I do understand doubt deeper....and next question...what happens if you do without understanding the reason or the outcome caused by your doings...well I do understand where this is going...and I do stat to prepear myself for deeper responsibillity.

I did awake from my dream because I was unsure if I was doing something I would regret when understanding it´s outcome....so I did awake myself and saying to myself...I do not know what cause and effect this will make....and I really felt the fear of unsureness in my whole being...and the feeling that arise was...I want to be sure what I am doing, before doing anything, so it will be worth it....to be dragged into something someone els want´s for own agendas is not what I want to let happen anymore....I must be given time to think it over if I do ...I must be given time and all fact´s so I can choose if I do it or not...not to be dragged and lured into happenings of someone elses agenda and I must pay the price so to speak because I did it without understanding the effect of it ....

In last night dream I was hearing someone talking like my life was less worth than others...and I was hearing myself say...to clear up in this dumpster...and when I hear myself say this then I understand that it meant my life bean lesser...so this is typical ego fear....

In last night dream I dream about colored stings...have no idea what it was...

In this seequence I was waiting on a parking line for my friend, and what a surprise in what car she came....in a very little Morris Mini...the ordinary cars was so big in comparission to my friends car...but she had a car...I do not have any....

In this seequence I was watching a film on the computor with my son...I was leaning my head at his sholder and he did not have any shirt on him...I did notice the screen change and I asked my son...can someone take a pic through the screen...because I have coverd over the camera with a piece of paper...and yes he said you can....I felt devestated that I can not be secure anywhere if that is possible...

WoW what a intence night...I am not sure how to write about it...but the contents of the dream was...I was shown how much this world is about appearence and look´s....There was 2 persons who did read exact same text but the first one was very beautiful and so good looking you nearly did stop breathing...and the second was so uggly so you nearly was not able to look at it...but did read and tell exat same word´s....Non of them did reach out with the message as you would expect...but the beautiful person more than the uggly on....wow....I am working with right vision and there is much work to do...thank you for this lesson.

In last nights dream I was looking when 2 persons a man and a women was talking to a working place boss...She was so sure to get permanent job there but what he did say to her...that it is not certan she can get a job there...I was listening to what he answered to the man...but she came to me to get comfort..she said...this is killing me...I am devestated...I hear him to say to the man...I will be happy to forward your wish...but I can not promise anything...I will let them know your wish....
She is sitting on the window where you put the flowers, she is hiding behind the curtains...and I was starting to say...that she is more capable and do not need this job, she is bigger than this...but now my alarm clock went off and I was awakened from the dream....

Last night was a night of lifting the veil again...it went so fast that I only could notice...like I was in one scenary and then the veil was lifted and beneath I was in total another scenary...and in that split sek I did understand and wake up.....