Sinera's Lucidiary

[Sinera]

The approach where you have all kinds of ideas prepared what you want to do when you get lucid or out of body can be limiting. It usually leads people to ignore their surroundings. Just imagine you were there for a reason, and compare this to the fact that the first thing you wanted is to get away.

Thanks, Korpo, for these very insight- and helpful interpretations, especially the shower combined with the elementary school is indeed eye-opening. I should have noted it (another of my many school class settings I experience, most often in dreamstate).

Regarding this part quoted, maybe that (my target-orientedness) is the most difficult thing for me. You know, I take an almost 'rational' and 'personal-scientific' approach to these things. This involves planning and setting goals (which you need or want or believe that you need/want to reach) beforehand. Many books on AP also recommend that you 'have targets in mind' when you go out, making constant affirmations also contain this element.

But you are right, what I still need is more patience, 'coolness', keeping a level head and a more improvising attitude in some of these situations. Problem is (also today) that I still do not get ludic(ventures) often enough, so I get too frantic when it happens and lose patience too soon (also in fear and knowledge of the fact that my time is very limited before I get 'unlucid' or wake up again). I definitely need to work on this.

[Korpo]

Hello, Volgerle.

Regarding this part quoted, maybe that (my target-orientedness) is the most difficult thing for me. You know, I take an almost 'rational' and 'personal-scientific' approach to these things. This involves planning and setting goals (which you need or want or believe that you need/want to reach) beforehand. Many books on AP also recommend that you 'have targets in mind' when you go out, making constant affirmations also contain this element.

There's different people with different responses, so these "success formulas" can backfire in unexpected ways.

The way you describe is pretty similar like I used to approach things. Being a somewhat cerebral type myself my ideas of how to do things or how things should work often led to frustration. I wasn't questioning things, I was just going forward with what I thought was the right response, or with rationalizations of why the course of action I chose was good.

This is a typical behaviour if the mental elemental is in charge. In the theosophic model the mental elemental is a collection of mental matter from the lower mental plane. It has, in a sense, a will of its own, mostly expressed in resistances. If there's a deeply ingrained habit, it will prefer to continue act like it. Also the phenomena as unchecked mental chatter, compulsive rumination or the inability to stay on task can be related to it.

For example concentration meditation is often aimed at reducing these tendencies. The mental elemental is tamed and kept on task. Distractions and mental chatter are recognised, but the focus always returns to the object of meditation. Other methods of taming the mental element exist, of course. And with good reason as the mental elemental can pose a problem in many different ways, and no solution solves all.

If your problem for example isn't distraction, concentration doesn't help. In fact, concentration power can result in situations like the one you see here. You know what you want to do. You stay on task. You apply all the fixes you know. You're not distracted, you're focused. But in another sense you're also mentally asleep. You run through a preestablished program. In a sense you're not lucid to the fact that a mental process is running the show, the script you have established for these occasions when you become aware you're in a dream/OBE.

So, what is needed on these occasions is a state of openmindedness. Curiosity. An inquisitive nature. You could call that the lucidity of the soul. My guess would be that this is what mindfulness training tries to develop. I call it lucidity because it is being present to your experience instead of living in a mental body dream. Observe yourself when you think about something - I can walk down a street and think about something and not notice anything outside myself I would recall later. It's like sleepwalking while awake.

This kind of lucidity applies to all states of consciousness, and Kurt has for example recommended several simple practices to do with observation to open up to it. Also, knowing that the script is not always the answer might lead you to stop and observe while having the experience. Every feedback that surprises you, like the inability to fly, is a clue in itself. It is a chance to get even more lucid and question your own behaviour. It is feedback that challenges you to even higher lucidity.

Cheers,
Oliver

[Sinera]

... this is what mindfulness training tries to develop. I call it lucidity because it is being present to your experience instead of living in a mental body dream. Observe yourself when you think about something - I can walk down a street and think about something and not notice anything outside myself I would recall later. It's like sleepwalking while awake.

I see. Reminds me (also referring to waking consciousness) to Eastern and esp. Buddhist teachings (E. Tolle also refers to it with "The Power Of Now"). Always try to "Be Here And Be Now". Beeing constantly immersed in your 'daydreaming' and keeping your mind 'occupied' with problems, past/future-related thought drifts is not a good way to "Be".

[Sinera]

So, has anyone of you 'been grabbed' in your physical bed or astral bedroom so far?

Again, as this actually interests me a lot due to very recent events (which I will report here, soon), didn't really anybody have experiences with being 'grabbed, seized, taken, touched, dragged', against or even according to their own will, out of their (astral or whatever) bed?

[CFTraveler]

You did know that this is how I became involved in these circles, right?

[Sinera]

You did know that this is how I became involved in these circles, right?

no, I did not know this (or if I read this once I might have forgotten), must have been a startling experience for you, if you had not known about these things before? (if you have an account of it here online, feel free to give a link for me to read)

[CFTraveler]

Here's something: viewtopic.php?f=39&t=8871

[Sinera]

Here's something: viewtopic.php?f=39&t=8871

Thanks, interesting. But so far - luckily for me - I would rule out any 'alien abduction scenario' for me, the balance has even tipped towards 'beneficient / friendly', but more to come on this. By comparison, interesting though in your account for me is the deliberate use of energy work techniques while it happens:

When I was being sucked out of my body, I would start doing sponging, and it returned the control of my astral body to me. It effectively aborted every attempt made to take me. .... When I learned to recognize it, I would then start praying and doing sponging, and did most of the countermeasures in the PSD book. Then the attacks moved to dreamtime (I would be having a dream about something, and I would be pulled away from the dream)- I trained myself by using NEW in the dream body, and it worked.

So if I compare it to my account of Dec 14th 2010 (see "Mind-Split & Grabbing Hands In "The Portal") it strikes me that your 'dream body energy work' is a bit similar to what I did then, when I was running energy (actually in physical and energy/dream body simultaneously) while trying to 'cleanse' myself of the grip (which worked, btw).

[CFTraveler]

I don't want to keep derailing your post but I just wanted to mention one thing- I have never been sure that this had anything to do with grey aliens, despite the imagery in the beginning of the experiences- after I applied various techniques the things stopped, and the experiences became more benevolent or beneficial. The jury's still out for me as to what really happened, and I don't rule out that they were initiatory experiences, even tests to see what I could handle without losing my mind.

[Sinera]

Note ex ante: This is the one that was missing for 2010. After that I will report bits from my journal which are almost 'up-to-date' from spring 2011
10/Nov/2010
The Library (School Of Homeopathy)

This one is so far another highlight for me and one of my most clear, impressive and also longest (sorry ) lucadventures. Kurt Leland told me it was a "big achievement" (viewtopic.php?f=33&t=9378&st=0&sk=t&sd=a&start=30# p139234). I couldn't ever bother to disagree.

This 'achievement' also had some consequences for my private (physical) life. In its aftermath it helped to direct me again towards a (not-so-new!) goal and re-inforced the decision to pursue it (again), a goal I had already considered about 1.5 years ago but dumped at the time. A little more on this below.
As you see by the link above, I had already told parts of this amazing lucidventure in another thread, but it never was the 'whole story' with all the facts. I'd left out some parts, maybe because I wanted to interpret it in certain ways (and was a little biased at the time), but perhaps also for mere convenience to have to write a little less. Anyway, here is the "whole story" now:

I start in an almost completely lucid state from my "portal" which has come to be my childhood bedroom. I fly out of the window, which is indeed the 'gate' to the astral. I am flying high over an unknown city. A big one, so it cannot be the small town of my childhood any longer. I notice this. I think to myself, that despite the fact that it looks real I want to do sth else and finally get the idea to 'leave this plane for a higher one'. I do not program any specific target, just 'take me to a higher plane'. So I ask for assistance and start to rise, faster and faster.

First I only see fog. A kind of foggy tunnel with different shades of white and grey.

Then (...wow!) I land in a huge "hall" in a kind of lobby or reception area as it seems. From there on there is no flying anymore, everything becomes physically Earth-like again. And VERY realistic to me. The architecture of this huge dome-like place was intricate and impressive.

My journal entry says that I hurried to get there since I was always aware of the fact that I "am projecting" and might - as usual for me - not have a lot of time before I get hurled back into waking physical reality. This is the first sign for me that I was indeed highly lucid then and I knew about the urgency to explore all of this (fast) since this place was highly unusual and I knew that possibly I would not get another chance to come here again so soon (proved right til today). Therefore ... it's grab all you can.

I walk up some steps to a group of people. There was a kind of 'enrolment procedure' taking place with freshers being welcomed and introduced by tutors, groups being formed. (I did not have to ask for everything, some things just came to me, I just suddenly knew!). It was like a kind of old and noble university or school.
The group which I join then, seems to be led by a girl (like me then, they all seemed to be in their mid-20ies, too!) named Irina or Irene. She seems to hold some papers or a notebook and explains things. I greet her by embracing her , there seems to be initial trust, I wouldn't usually embrace a stranger, neither in physical and even less in non-physical reality. Next to trust, this is also a kind of expression of my joy of 'knowing' that I finally made it to a very special place. I cannot exclude the idea that I even felt I knew this place and these people before (hence the trust), as if it was a sort of homecoming. But that is only a slight intuition. I cannot remember saying to s.o. of them "hello, it's me again" or "ah, it's you again, how are you?". It was just a little feeling of familiarity.

Anyway, I had to ask for their names. It is another sign of my enhanced lucidity and awareness that I asked these people twice or even three times each for their names. I repeated the names then to myself. I did this all as a memorisation technique, with the certitude that I need to 'download' this information into my waking memory. I NEEDED and WANTED desperatly to remember their names!
They were all very patient with me and seemed to understand my needs and overall situation. At one point, I told them that I was "not dead" ( ) and - perhaps even with a little pride - that "I am a projector". They smiled and seemed to acknowledge this with understanding, still, they weren't too surprised about this as it seemed.
So I kept repeating over and over that "unfortunately I don't have a lot of time before I'm forced to go back". My notes also tell me (quote): "I get nervous of fear that I cant hold it for so long and start moving from one foot to the other to prevent me from 'waking up' and vanishing". I do not remember my footstomping action (a typical human nervousness sympton, isn't it?) but as I recorded this immediately after my return and waking up, I take it as it is.

Three persons (those whose names I asked several times) were Irene (the 'tutor'), Rafaela (a beauty with even a little lascivious air) and Michael. We talk something more and laugh a lot and have friendly chats, but I do not remember the content of it all. Except for the names (which I focussed on) a lot has been lost.

Then I walk away further, as we then agreed, with Michael who will explain some things to me and show me around. We walk through some rooms of a nearby library. Some smaller rooms also, like reading and study groups rooms. I see other students there. The library looks almost old-fashioned. I see shelves full of books, also in piles on some tables. I ask his name again (he says 'Michael' again, without being irritated by my obstination with this) when we turn around another corner.

I already seem to know that this is sth like the faculty of Alternative Medicine or even more specifically department for Homeopathy. So we finally find a little seminar room (or even office) with a lot of books there again. We take a seat at a table in comfy armchairs. The scene is again quite "mundane". Michael starts to tell me about this place (I forgot what it was) and then begins a talk about 'the history of Homeopathy'. Before that I had already apologised to him in anticipation and told him that I feel that I might not be able to "hold the line" here any longer and will be taken back to my reality. He is (as all of them are) very sympathetic and says it's okay. I also say thanks for everything and start to listen then.

He starts with the overview and I am surprised that he does not start with S. Hahnemann (the 'inventor' of Homeopathy in the 18/19th cent.) but traces the origins of this type of medicine to sth different, I even think he places it into ancient times, but I don't remember exactly what he tells me. I only get the first sentences of the 'lecture'. Then the seemingly unavoidable happens, I start to 'wane'. I see him smile at me, then the picture vanishes.

I am back in my "portal". But I really 'slammed' back, something I'd never experienced before. (As if I had more 'impact' force falling down from the height of this 'higher plane'). I'm clinging to the wall (almost like a spider) and of my childhood bedroom, still shaking up-down a while, as if I had to 'absorb shock' the 'landing' from that place 'on high'. It is dark in the room. Then I wake up in physical reality with my usual PREES (post reentry electricity sensations).

Comments / Afterthoughts

Many comments regarding my state of lucidity are already given in the text above. I still wrestle a bit with the fact that I only asked for their names and not for so much more information that could have been retrieved from there. Don't ask my why I did not ask and memorise other important points, such as what this place exactly is and what my relation to them and this place was. So many questions. But possibly I asked for it and we talked about this and the memory got lost for me.

Once I thought that this whole place might even have been my higher self (some say that you also have libraries like soul records / life books there!) and the guys I met my incarnations, but now I am more convinced that it was a usual educational area (which Kurt places on the Mental Plane) with 'other' people. Perhaps it even formed part of the overall (akashic) libary and education system, possibly in what's called Focus 27 by the Monroe Institute.

1.5 years before this, I indeed already had considered to start a training as an Alternative Health Practicioner (many of whom do Homeopathy as one of their treatments). So this might explain why my higher/super- or sub-conscious mind steered me to that place and not somewhere else.
It should also be mentioned that exactly around that time for some weeks (Nov 2010) I was visiting a healer for Reconnective Healing, I also was 'reconnected' (= aligned to axiatonal gridlines) then. I considered to become a Reconnective Healer myself and I will do so: this year there are some Level-1/2 Seminars in my country. Maybe that (together with my former intention) also influenced the 'visit' to this destination.

Furthermore, around that time in Nov., one night, after a longer talk with someone (guide/HS?) in dreamstate, my hands became energy-activated almost 'by command ("activate them")' from which I woke up with tingling/burning hand palms. Since then I feel energy (from slight tingling until stronger, although bearable and controlable burning sensations) now almost constantly in my hands, esp. the right one. My observations prove to me that the tingling gets stronger when I think or write about any spiritual matters, and even more so when I do energy work exercise or self-healing with them! It's really fascinating.

Now, if all goes according to plan, I will be a part-time (or more) Reconnective Healer / 'certified' Alternative Health Practioner in about 2 years from now.