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Thread: Learning to become self-aware

  1. #1
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    Smile Learning to become self-aware

    I am setting up a space here for myself (and others) to record my experiences, understandings and insights in a hope that it might help me to shift more permanently into a more self-aware space....


    Thoughts, insights and comments from others welcome xX

    .... and held in appreciation (whenever possible xx)

    -----------------------------------------------------------------

    So back in 1994, i had a strange urge and a feeling of something 'missing'....

    After finding books, i found it was spirituality that was missing from my life and 5 years later got connected energetically to 2 subtle energetic methods......

    18 yrs later and i am still trying to live the spiritual life i read about and then 'dreamed' of.....

    Had my 3rd awakening AND this time 'BREAKDOWN' space in May 2006 and been working constantly on dealing with it ALL ever since.

    My medical diagnosis is Bi-Polar Disorder and i agree i do fit all that this diagnosis states....

    I choose not to use medications (most of the time) but find that valerian is my most helpful substance when things start to become too intense and emotionally de-stabilizing. In the past, there was never a point where i felt it was TOO MUCH or enough..... as to block the process was tooooo EXTREMELY terrifying for me to even contemplate, but thankfully these last years have been easing to the point of it feeling safe to say... 'yeah, enough is enough......it's ok and safe to take a break now' and i will take some valerian..... this moves me out of the emotional body into my mental body, so all life & thoughts donot impact and trigger me emotionally continuously.....


    So at the moment, i am in what i call my better or NEW space (used to be what i called my old 'high', manic or pyschotic space) so i can think, feel, explore, get understandings and see how i am 'being' ....... i sooo appreciate this space.....

    and the energy in this space is sooo NEEDED ...... i like the term that the AYP site uses ~ Ecstatic Bliss


    what i have found and am finding constantly is that:-


    • there is a fine line between being in a beneficial evolving awareness space and an overwhelming awareness space (OR the complete opposite state of this for me is a state of complete SHUTDOWN)


    So i have been learning how to stay out of the overwhelming awareness space, but without moving myself completely out of it and back into complete shutdown and stuckness.....


    Never knew what i am living now even existed before, or maybe i did..... BUT just forgot or 'fell asleep' to it .... xxxx
    Last edited by newfreedom; 13th January 2014 at 06:38 PM.
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

  2. #2

    Re: Learning to become self-aware

    Valerian is a great natural calming plant. I'm sure that you know that it should not be used to excess, like any other plant or herb.

    Cats are very attracted to valerian - and, I suspect, not just to the smell, as most people believe. Cats are great astral projectors and there is a probable link. Cats will lick material soaked in valerian like crazy - and then often fall asleep afterwards. Perhaps to project as a result?

    BTW, I don't use valerian for sleeplessness. I don't have that problem; I fall asleep too easily, any day, without anything!

    I do so hope that this thread will help you work things through - and apologies for the possible digression about valerian!

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    Re: Learning to become self-aware

    Quote Originally Posted by LPCF View Post
    Valerian is a great natural calming plant. I'm sure that you know that it should not be used to excess, like any other plant or herb.

    Cats are very attracted to valerian - and, I suspect, not just to the smell, as most people believe. Cats are great astral projectors and there is a probable link. Cats will lick material soaked in valerian like crazy - and then often fall asleep afterwards. Perhaps to project as a result?

    BTW, I don't use valerian for sleeplessness. I don't have that problem; I fall asleep too easily, any day, without anything!

    I do so hope that this thread will help you work things through - and apologies for the possible digression about valerian!
    Hi LPCF, no digression there....

    Well the valeriam tablets i currently use are to be taken 3 times a day..... on occasions i may take this dosage for about 3 days at a time, usually this is long enough and then i stop taking them, as i do no longer need their support.

    I don't take valerian to sleep, only for emotional stability... for myself they seem to shut my emotional body down, so i become immune to being triggered emotionally.

    Interestingly, i found an old iridology document that i had had done about 14 yrs ago and they had advised two herbs. one was st. john wort and the other was valerian...... i had never used valerian till about a year ago when i was looking to find ways to help me get back into sleep. At that time when i tried valerian i was not overly impressed with it, as i felt it shut me down too much and i found this rather too disturbing to want to use in that way. A year on and i now do not find valerian disturbing, but extremely supportive to help me with my movement into self awareness, it helps me maintain emotional stability without total awareness shutdown...


    Thanks for the input.... interesting about valerian and cats x x
    Last edited by newfreedom; 13th January 2014 at 06:40 PM.
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

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    Question Re: Learning to become self-aware

    First part of my Post copied from Extreme sports: Awakening

    Seven & a half years on, i am still in the 'adjustment period', i have still not fathomed out how to continuously navigate in a better way. I know the potential to do so exists, as i have experienced this many times. However it seems the mental understandings of the 'how to' i am still learning /working out & also the capabilities of the 'how to' are seemingly needing more practice to embed, so as to become more readily available for me to use continuously.

    Barbara Marciniak & the P.'s say that one of the reasons we are here is to 'learn how to use our biological computer'

    This is what i am still busily focused /working on more than 7 yrs. later

    --------------------------

    So when i can, i put my attention on an aspect of myself (being mindful ?)

    obstacles to this include
    • forgetting to do so, or forgetting to continue doing so
    • mood or emotional space not allowing me to even attempt to pay any attention of anything or even think

    i have found that paying attention to
    • 'where i'm at' or
    • 'what's going on for myself'

    is the most useful place to focus as this then allows me to 'know' what i need on a feeling level. However i find this focus of attention still very hard to acheive, & often find myself focusing on what i am doing physically instead.

    Once i arrive in work, my ability to 'stay present' with myself is 'lost' & if i remember to 'come back' at any time during my morning in work, all i really 'get' is a feeling of emotional discomfort.

    Travelling home on the bus, i am usually able to think about paying attention once again, but at this point, i don't even know where to focus my attention anymore and everything i try feels very emotionally uncomfortable. I often end up 'going off', lost in thoughts by default, as this is much more comfortable.....no awareness of anything.

    I am still having to put in huge amounts of effort, focus & energy to engage with my 'feeling-self' to enable myself to function from a 'feeling-level' state of being, but presently my 'feeling-self' keeps me (mostly) very limited in my choices & options......it's a very small space.. (unless i am able to engage alot & open more of the space)

    If i ignore my 'feeling-self' & just function from a mental state of being (my old default mode) i quickly become physically exhausted & emotionally uncomfortable & am unable to function for long in this way anymore either.
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

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    Experiences & Understandings of receiving internal images / visions

    During past 'high' energy spaces i would always be overwhelmed by the info. coming in, there was always way too much & i would have no idea how to ease or lessen this experience.

    i would

    • get images,
    • understandings coming in as thoughts,
    • hear info. as spoken words,
    • see energetic overlays & subtle energies
    • get bombard with incoming information from everything i saw physically

    It's great to be open to recieve all of these things & i am never happier than when i am able to experience, percieve & recieve. However in the early years of these experiences, this openess to recieve was always accompanied by me being in a different type of subtle energetic space than my norm ie. the high subtle energetic spaces that can induce 'mania' or pyschosis.

    Within the last 2 weeks i have had 2 experiences that helped me understand a little more about the info. i receive & how in the early days i would become consumed by it.


    Body feeling experience
    So i am sitting on the bench at the bus stop, holding a pet carrier (i am taking my daughter's ferret to the vets to be checked) & trying to be 'present' with 'what's going on for me'. i feel my physical self sitting there on the bus bench & my doing this brings in an image/ picture in my mind.

    It is an image of an animated film 'spirited away' of which i am familiar with.... i see the little girl sitting on a wooden bench waiting, she also has something on her knee. i remember that the little girl is waiting for a train & not a bus & decide to 'look-up' the scene in the film to refresh my mind.
    i do this & interestingly their is no exact secene like the image that i got, there is a similiar image of the little girl sitting on the train at 3.07 & 4.24 mins.

    understandings

    • feeling myself in my physical body & it's posture can bring in visual info. of images & pictures
    • theses pictures can be different to the original material seen in 3D
    • these images / pictures being different to the real original ones seens, can cause mixed, false, corrupted memories, misunderstandings & mis-infomation


    Visual Reminder Experience
    i was standing at another bus stop (no seat) when a cyclist rode past on his bike, the shape of his mouth impacted me & i got a visual image of a friend i know. this internal image of my friend's face was so strong it super imposed it'self over the cyclist & for all intents & purposes this cyclist could now very well of been my friend passing by me on this bike in real life !

    i can understand now, why i would become so 'lost'/ confused in the 'high' energy spaces when these experiences were happening. In these high subtle energetic spaces the internal visions were so 'real' / strong that 'coming back' from them to relate to the 'real' physical was impossible & my reality would just become what i was receiving internally as visions, images & other internal info. with physical reality being nothing more than the place from where i would recieve the info.

    Both these experiences were interesting & 'WOW' moments for me, very illuminating & educational
    Last edited by newfreedom; 13th January 2014 at 09:48 PM.
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

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    Telepathy or the passing of info.

    Just had an interesting experience with my little dog Zen.

    My daughter was telling him to go & eat his dinner, since he wasn't eating it, he would look at her then look back at me.
    At one point as i watched him with eye contact, it seemed as if he was 'talking' & telling me a stream of information, i could only sense this, & it was experienced as him talking & telling me a long barrage of info. I was aware of this happening due to subtle energy fluctuations infront of & around his face.

    Unfortunately, i didn't understand a word of it, but he definately told me a load of things

    i have had this experience before with gazing at the sun & looking at a newborn baby......info. just seems to be being passed from them to myself, even though i am unaware on a conscious level of what they have just told me.....

    Very cool, just need to find a way to understand/decode the info. sent now x x
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

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    Subtle energies effect

    Yesterday was a beneficial impactful day for me & this morning on waking up to take the dogs for their morning walk after 5 hrs sleep, i awoke to strong energy vibrating in my body.

    It's quite abrupt to wake-up to this energy, but there is a pleasantness about it (least there is for me now, when i first experienced these energies working in me, (approx. 2007) i would be absolutely terrified out of my mind & always felt like i was imminently going to physically die) & the energies give a feeling of euphoria, excitement & 'feeling-alive' ....also enthusiasm & appreciation

    Now that the energies have lessened, if i 'tune-in' it feels like the energetic feeling is associated with my heart chakra, ..... my heart chakra is active.... i like this feeling it makes me feel so good, so safe...

    Earlier i had a strong sensation of the 'static bliss' in my belly area, this is another energy, sensation i adore, it feels sooo comfortable & safe & gives a feeling of optimism & expansiveness

    Being in this energy space feels like the 'right' / optimum place to be, where life could be a 'joy to live', where living would be one of 'thriving' instead of a 'huge effort' just to get through

    This energy space does 'still' bring up mild franticness in me, but it;s soo energetic to what i am usually in, it might just be the way i experience this energy & if it ever lasted long enough i would settle into as my 'norm' & just be a more physically capable, energetically active person.

    The energy feeling sure does open doors to what's possible out there / in life to do...

    I am going to try & engage with this energy / how i feel in this energy today as much as possible, because i have found for myself from experience, that if i am able to engage with myself in these better spaces, then i have more chance of maintaining them for longer.....

    ...... so.. 'here's hoping' .......xx
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

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    Re: Subtle energies effect

    Quote Originally Posted by newfreedom View Post
    Yesterday was a beneficial impactful day for me & this morning on waking up to take the dogs for their morning walk after 5 hrs sleep, i awoke to strong energy vibrating in my body.

    It's quite abrupt to wake-up to this energy, but there is a pleasantness about it (least there is for me now, when i first experienced these energies working in me, (approx. 2007) i would be absolutely terrified out of my mind & always felt like i was imminently going to physically die) & the energies give a feeling of euphoria, excitement & 'feeling-alive' ....also enthusiasm & appreciation

    Now that the energies have lessened, if i 'tune-in' it feels like the energetic feeling is associated with my heart chakra, ..... my heart chakra is active.... i like this feeling it makes me feel so good, so safe...

    Earlier i had a strong sensation of the 'static bliss' in my belly area, this is another energy, sensation i adore, it feels sooo comfortable & safe & gives a feeling of optimism & expansiveness

    Being in this energy space feels like the 'right' / optimum place to be, where life could be a 'joy to live', where living would be one of 'thriving' instead of a 'huge effort' just to get through

    This energy space does 'still' bring up mild franticness in me, but it;s soo energetic to what i am usually in, it might just be the way i experience this energy & if it ever lasted long enough i would settle into as my 'norm' & just be a more physically capable, energetically active person.

    The energy feeling sure does open doors to what's possible out there / in life to do...

    I am going to try & engage with this energy / how i feel in this energy today as much as possible, because i have found for myself from experience, that if i am able to engage with myself in these better spaces, then i have more chance of maintaining them for longer.....

    ...... so.. 'here's hoping' .......xx

    The early hours of the morning are a time when our subconscious mind is much easier to communicate with, and often waking during the early hours of the day (apart from being awesome for meditation eg between 3-5am) you will have the feeling-tone leftover from your dreams, or the feeling-tone of your body running through its healing and regeneration phase (Delta sleep), also you generally feel the unique tone of your higher self during these hours much stronger during these hours, depending on your focus.

    I like to do automatic writing during those times, sometimes I will write for 30-60 minutes, and then the next day I will read what I have written, and have no conscious memory of it, because the material came straight from my subsconcious mind, it just "flows" through me like water downhill, no effort etc.

    Now, as for the electromagnetic field of your heart (heart chakra) you can activate this as often as you like, for as long as you like. Greg Braden refers to this as the "Science of Compassion", you can find his videos on youtube, and also there is the Heart Math organisation where you can download a free PDF with the basic technique, or buy books with their more in depth techniques (same basic technique, just different uses).

    I use the heart chakra for energy-healing each day, previously I was not doing this method, since I added this technique to the previous method I was using (which turned out to be only half a method that I misunderstood). It used to be my hands would glow/tingle with energy, but since adding the heart chakra along with the brain/mind (thought+emotion+feeling) my whole forearms have an internal fiery feel to them is most pleasant, and more focused than before.

    If you want to experience more of what you have been experiencing, don't leave it to chance, daily practice practice practice brings results. It's like Rob says in "Evolution", it's better to practice each day with clear focus and intent than a little once in a blue moon.

    "Being in this energy space feels like the 'right' / optimum place to be, where life could be a 'joy to live', where living would be one of 'thriving' instead of a 'huge effort' just to get through"
    What you describe is a natural state of man, the Yogis call it bliss (although there are different degrees of Samadhi, I think the best kind is waking Samadhi that travels with you through all your days, rather than temporary meditative bliss)

    If we lived in a world free of wars, pollution, bad intentions etc, a world of zero resistance, then life flows, we support each other, we love and are loved, we are present and never trying to escape, or shaking off the negative energy from other people, our natural state is blissful, but each day we walk through a spider-web of all kinds of energy, some of it we don't even know, we pick it up as if it were our own, like a magnet picks up anything that is attractive to it, good or bad.

    What am I getting at is Practice Practice Practice the more you practice, the more you intend to be and live a certain way, you draw those probabilities to you from the quantum field. But enjoy where you are now, don't just be craving for the future.
    “Vision without action is daydream.
    Action without vision is nightmare.”
    —Japanese Proverb

  9. #9

    Re: Telepathy or the passing of info.

    Quote Originally Posted by newfreedom View Post
    Just had an interesting experience with my little dog Zen.

    My daughter was telling him to go & eat his dinner, since he wasn't eating it, he would look at her then look back at me.
    At one point as i watched him with eye contact, it seemed as if he was 'talking' & telling me a stream of information, i could only sense this, & it was experienced as him talking & telling me a long barrage of info. I was aware of this happening due to subtle energy fluctuations infront of & around his face.

    Unfortunately, i didn't understand a word of it, but he definately told me a load of things

    i have had this experience before with gazing at the sun & looking at a newborn baby......info. just seems to be being passed from them to myself, even though i am unaware on a conscious level of what they have just told me.....

    Very cool, just need to find a way to understand/decode the info. sent now x x
    I haven't been on this forum for a while and only noticed this post today. Telepathy with animals is perfectly possible. But if you are not on exactly the same "wavelength", but not far off, then you will experience what happened to you. If you practise regularly with your dog, there is no reason why you should not be able to "decode" a message package.

    Pet-caretaker telepathy is actually quite common, with dogs actually better at reading our minds than the other way round. Have you read "Dogs that Know when their Owners are Coming Home" by Rupert Sheldrake? You can read a description and some reviews of the book here: http://www.amazon.com/Dogs-That-Thei.../dp/0307885968

  10. #10
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    Subtle Energetic Awarenesses

    So today i am in a 'new' space with regards to my spiritual capabilities & experiences

    (i will write them up when i can ! ...lots )

    i was reminded of Mutley's 'sneaky' laugh today & so wanted to re-experience him...

    Mutley's laugh



    As i am scrolling down the list of titles looking for this old thread of mine i read the words 'Opening third eye as an empath' at the instant i read this title a subtle energy chi strand shoots out from the AD page towards my face (3rd eye area)

    i go back to find this title, but find two different titles instead that it seems had been melded together to give me this now 'new' title
    The 2 post titles actually were:
    • 3rd eye opening - by Daisy
    • take an empathy quiz - by Beekeeper

    .....presently located on page 3
    So i shall take an interested look at these 2 posts later ~~
    Last edited by newfreedom; 5th May 2015 at 04:52 PM.
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

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