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Thread: Learning to become self-aware

  1. #31
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    Self - harming tendencies

    Self-harming tendency understandings

    i just got the image of myself bashing my wrists against an object until they became broken & floppy, i have had this vision before.

    i felt into this & then got another visual image, this time it is of a chicken hanging upside down by it's feet & being swung into an object until it's neck is floppy (dead)

    Animal killing is connected to my self harming feelings then ...... makes sense

    (admin, mods if this post is deemed too gruesome & disturbing for others, please delete it, Thanks)
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

  2. #32
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    Re: Learning to become self-aware

    12th Sept. 2012 - So i have been learning how to stay out of the overwhelming awareness space, but without moving myself completely out of it and back into complete shutdown and stuckness.....
    Nearly 4 years on & i still have not mastered this yet ...
    It's something i am still very much learning to do & presently working on it once again

    Earlier i was given the word phrase: 'Help me Home'

    Word Pattern: 'What are you chopsin about' - This was a saying my dad would use towards me.... and yes, i was a very 'chopsy' kid

    ------------------------

    10/06/16

    My senses have heightened:
    • my eye focus has changed, so i 'see' others - human / animal eyes as focused differently
    • smells are clearer, more distinct
    • sound is clearer, sharper & more intense - just heard some bird sounds i didn't recognise in my garden trees, on looking closely, the sound was coming from 3 / 4 baby blue tits, not sure if i've seen baby blue tits before, they were so cute

    --------------------------------------


    9am - clearing / releasing 'grief' through 'crying' (been a few months since i had a good, deep cry)

    Trigger: was a music video where from an above viewpoint it showed ducks moving through the water, following a trail between the weeds.

    And on finishing writing this up, i now have a wretching throat cough (there is irritation in my physical throat)
    Last edited by newfreedom; 10th June 2016 at 08:16 AM.
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

  3. #33
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    Re: Healing crisis symptoms

    Quote Originally Posted by newfreedom View Post
    Date: 19/01/16


    • cut on tip of middle finger, left Hand
    • the usual gum & teeth agony
    • constipation
    • diarrhea & belly cramps
    • the usual odema in feet, ankles, legs causing agony
    • cold symptoms - running nose, chest cough
    • Heart palpatations
    • clumpsiness / dropping of items / objects from hands (hand looses it's grip & item falls to the ground)
    • limb weakness
    • vertigo
    • forgetfulness
    • short term memory loss
    • confusion
    • irritability
    • an energetic throbbing inside ears
    • lower wind
    • 21/01/16 - 2 x shards of glass in my rt. foot
    • cut knuckle of L hand little finger

    Out of the above healing crisis symptoms, this phase has had:


    • cuts, nicks & wickow
    • some gum & teeth discomfort
    • some diarrhea & belly cramps
    • cold symptoms - running nose, chest cough, sore / dry throat
    • Heart palpatations less, more subtle energetic heart chakra activations instead
    • less clumpsiness / dropping of items / objects from hands (hand looses it's grip & item falls to the ground)
    • vertigo (alot of dizziness & vertigo at times, very powerful / strong - appears to be connected to 'life' / the physical / simulation triggers
    • forgetfulness - less so
    • short term memory loss - less
    • confusion is gone, some 'blank- mind' moments instead
    • irritability - still strong at times, less so the last few days as i move back towards more 'normal for me' sleep patterns
    • an energetic throbbing inside ears - occasional ear effects, subtle energetic sensationsthe most gentle, but clear ever, so far for me
    • lower wind - small amounts (BAD) because i am HAVING to work on EATING issues & eating some things 'I DON'T eat' / would not CHOOSE to Eat.
    • 21/01/16 - 2 x shards of glass in my rt. foot - no glass / splinters (yet)


    ADDED NOTE:

    approx. half an hr after posting this comment, i managed to get myself the first splinter (i was brushing my foot back & forth on the carpet... for what ever reason ? !)
    Last edited by newfreedom; 15th November 2016 at 02:02 PM.
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

  4. #34
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    Re: Learning to become self-aware

    Fun-times

    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

  5. #35
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    Re: Healing crisis symptoms

    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

  6. #36
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    Re: Learning to become self-aware

    Just cleaned my computer, it removed a 6 numbered figures of #stuff# ..... BUT still it hadn't deleted my password for here .......... ~~~~~~~~ ~~~ ~~ ~ ~/~ 'BOO'~p' ~\~ 'Hello !' --- x XX .




    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

  7. #37
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    Re: Learning to become self-aware

    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

  8. #38
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    Re: Learning to become self-aware



    Hahahahaha............'s funny.
    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

  9. #39
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    Re: Learning to become self-aware

    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

  10. #40
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    Re: Learning to become self-aware

    " the core of spirituality is to optimize your personal evolution" ~ Robert Bruce

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