I have suffered from depression and anxiety for pretty much my whole life. I've been on two different anxiety/depression medications in the past. I didn't like how they made me feel though, and I still feel like I'm recovering from being off them and it's been over 2 years now. I've been a loner my whole life, always have felt different than everyone else. I realized recently too that I'm an empath. This has caused me a great deal of anxiety and depression to the point where I've had suicidal thoughts. My father is Schizophrenic which honestly doesn't help with what I'm going through because I just feel like I'm losing my mind.

I've suffered from nightmares my whole life, have journals full of them. I have always been afraid to sleep alone because that's usually when they happen. I experienced sleep paralysis as I got older and for a long time was having recurring nightmares. I would go into sleep paralysis, try to wake up, but end up in a dream where I would be in bed but there were entities in my bedroom. I have had two with a big, black entity. The first one he walked into my bedroom, saw me, and walked up to my bed and touched my hand. The other he was just standing in my bedroom. Another one I have had too is a woman in a white dress. I have managed to dismiss whatever these "entities" in the past few years as they don't bother me anymore, thank god.

I had a really weird dream one morning a few weeks ago where I felt someone touch my hand and when I sat up my boyfriend was there. We went outside and it was dark out and we got into his car and drove off. I remember looking at the clock and it said 10:22 pm. I started telling him I was afraid to sleep and he asked why, in which I replied that I was afraid of the grey aliens. He then said, "Alex, you need to go to the light" over and over until I woke up in sleep paralysis. I then had an OBE and saw three entities in my house but they didn't seem threatening. I didn't interact with them though, instead I flew up towards space but as soon as I got there I got a sharp pain in my heart and woke up.

Then earlier at work I recalled a dream I must have had last night or earlier when I was asleep where my boyfriend and I were driving through an intersection and T-boned a car. I remember the impact, inhaling deeply, and feeling that same sharp pain in my heart.

I just feel like I am so attuned to everything. It's made coping with my emotions hard though which is really setting me back from my fullest potential. I want to write books on these subjects and learn as much as I can. A few years back I told my aunt about these entities that were in my room and surprisingly she suggested that I may be psychic. But that makes me nervous about the dreams with "going to the light" and the car crash.