-protein drinks!
-feeling in a better mood today
-getting some skin color
-feeling a sense of release today
-the insights that came to me in meditation yesterday about not rushing
-hair ties
-posting a new selfie on instagram and being surprised by all the likes i got right away.i was quite nervous about posting so it made me feel good admittedly.
-photo editing apps
-all the storage space on my phone now
-how amazing my best friend is and having him in my life
-asking the universe for a sign today. clarity is needed.
-coffee
-feeling that poke symbol on facebook from d standing out at me again like it's telling me to poke him. last time this happened,i followed that and he poked back and we got back to talking again. but logic is overriding me and i'm not going to,for now. i don't want him thinking i want him to add me back,even though,i did delete him and would love for him to add me back. maybe he wants me to add him back.idk,but i asked the universe for a sign so some clarity is coming
-using my pain as fuel
-interesting bright colored short lucid dreams that are very metaphorical
-sweaters
-my neighborhood growing on me a little bit,and embracing it a smidge and working with it
-heart chakra music and theta music
-ways to get all water consumption goals in easily
-feeling my feelings
-feeling strange and observing this feeling. yesterday felt so eerie,like i shifted realities and kept noticing odd things and just felt weird,like i've been here before type thoughts a lot.
-changing your past meditations
-quantum leaping
-knowing i create my reality
-getting my writing thing for work done! such a release.
-blankets and waking up feeling warm
-the sun
-being a romantic
-detaching a little from online lurking of d
-my eyes feeling better
-faith
-my stomach being flatter
-dancing
-sweaters
-being very pretty
-veganism becoming more and more popular
-d still seeming to respect me,i keep fearing certain things but he seems really respectful and innocent like ican relax. maybe i'm wrong,but i don't think i am..so why can't i have him? he may play games and be insecure and doesn't make as much money as some guys and has that long beard that's now grown on me,but he seems like he'd be super loving and would worship the girl he is with. or,maybe i'm wrong.i got mad he was minimal in my last text,but maybe he thought i was trying to friendzone him.i wasn't. i was just upset about j moving cross country and was hoping someone i like could maybe talk with me about it. but,clearly that's off limits with him..
-remembering who i was when j liked me and pursued me and fell for me,so i can be that girl again,and be better,and attract love into my life again
-staying consistent with the universe now and decisive on my wants
-vegan products
-resourcefulness and efficiency ideas. yay!
-meditation
-understanding something is off about when d approached me. something is mysterious and i will get to the bottom of it. maybe i'm naive but either he is very fake to have approached me so soon after his breakup,like it was sooo soon.two weeks at the most..so,either he was being fake and using me i wonder for an ego boost,or he liked me even before,after all it's quite odd he approached me a little over a month after my phone bugged out and liked all his posts on that social app. i mean,i'm one of the first he thinks to try to ask out? so practically speaking,i'm not thinking he didn't try doing that to other girls,too just being in that desperate position and who knows what else he tried.i even seen a post on his facebook implying he was poking his friends and him saying he was poking whoever facebook suggested. but,even that felt like a set-up to me,like he was poking other girls so i wouldn't think it odd he poked me.on one hand,it seems he very quickly got hungry and maybe trying hard to ease that pain,but on the other hand,i had thought he was making it seem like that,so he could approach me without it seeming so odd,but that's too...thinking highly of myself.and,so there is definitely something missing. i just can't pin what it is.i'd love to do some kind of deep meditation to get answer. when this first happened,i right away thought it was because of that social app glitch and that he was approaching me intentionally.i had thought he was single! but,then ifound out how recent his breakup was and it just seemed like maybe he was trying really hard to ease his pain. but,two weeks at the most..something off with that..
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