Quote Originally Posted by buttercup View Post
Thank you for your intention to help but I am not a Buddhist and my gratitude lists come from the teachings of the law of attraction,positive psychology,and loving yourself. They are taught by many who inspire me such as yoga gurus who teach you to list things about yourself,your life,even your body as well as well as new thought leaders. These are teachings that have resonated with me for quite some time now,years. What you focus upon expands. What resonates with me is that desires are good,not bad. Also,"there is no good or bad,only thinking makes it so."-William Shakespeare I've felt more happier focusing on so called superficial qualities and material things and it has only benefited me and expanded those things in my life and allowed me to feel more contentment if those were things that really made me feel good from the heart. The only helpful thing I can see from this is if i've been repeatedly grateful for a phase of something i'm ready to move on from,then it may be time to focus on that phase in a different way,thus detaching from it and manifesting the desired outcome.
The great thing about the teachings of Buddhism is that you don't need to be a Buddhist to apply them to your life- they are representative of the human condition and applicable to all people. Another great thing about Buddhism is that you are not required to have blind faith; the purpose of the teachings is that one tests their validity through experimentation, practice, and personal exploration.

Desire is said to be the root cause of suffering in Buddhist philosophy. It is the desire for sensual pleasures, the desire to become, and the desire to get rid of that cause the varying degrees of mental anguish common to all deluded (unenlightened) people, these desires being the roots of all attachment. A bit of reflection and insight into this concept will likely allow one to see the truth of this principle as it has played out in one's life since a person's earliest memories.


Desire, the way it is played out in most people's lives, is essentially a never-ending cycle of craving and striving for materialistic and/or impermanent pleasures or aspirations that never lead to a truly satisfying or permanent happiness. Rather, they only lead to stress and dissatisfaction, for even if they bring a temporary happiness, that happiness will eventually fade away as it is based on conditioned and impermanent phenomena, leaving the person to continue their impossible quest to find a permanent happiness in impermanent conditions.

A couple truths that I have come to realize from my own experience is that the fulfillment of my desires has never been as satisfying as I would anticipate, if it was satisfying at all, and would only lead to more desires. The gradual dissolution of many of my previously held desires has led to a great degree of tranquility, ease, joy, and overall wellbeing in my life. Freedom from the sense of urgency and tension that craving causes is a truly liberating thing.

That's not to say that all desires are bad. There are unskillful or unwholesome desires which arise from greed, ill will, or delusion, and there are wholesome desires which arise from selfless kindness, compassion, clear view, and an effort to cultivate true happiness and eliminate suffering by the skillful means outlined in the Buddha's teachings. The idea is to recognize and eliminate the unskillful desires and cultivate skillful ones.