MondEgo, This forum is for everyone.

You, who is searching for answers and skills ( I think) and Buttercup who started this thread to help herself. If I remember correctly at the time she started this she was struggling and this helped her to lift her spirits and highlight just why she should be grateful.

I never visit the Neg Forum section. I have no experience there and would not be able to help anyone. Maybe you should just concentrate on the forum headings you are interested in . Although the site can go quiet if you look at old posts from a few years ago you may find much to help you.
Members come and go, and come back again often after a while. I wouldnt advise asking to be banned as only last year two metaphysical sites that I visited closed.
Buttercup is as welcome to continue her Gratitude list just as you are welcome to post as long as it does not deliberately offend another member.