-thinking d and i were over last night for good and that i'd put it behind me and shed away the layers from all that and focus on what new i can bring in my life and how i can move forward. but,i also did another tarot reading and to my surprise got positive readings saying we are going to unite and it's a kismet relationship. which,is what i've felt since we first started talking which is why it drove me crazy how he was being. i'm not often wrong about these things.
-water
-waking up and seeing sure enough,a few texts from D telling me can i please explain more why i'm mad and saying good morning and that he likes me. feeling fed up,and over it,i told him we can just be friends and came out with it,at first telling him i have nothing to say but when he said he wishes he knew what he did,i just said him stringing me along,etc,etc and we talked it out,and he claimed he didnt think i was that into him and that he felt he had to stretch to get me to text him and that im sweet and all these things and saying let's meet up and asking me what dates i'm free. so,idk,if this is just another game from him or what,but we seemed to be on the same page,him saying he had been confused by me and i told him i don't know how i've always been nice to him but am not going to chase him. so,i think now,were going to go out as friends? unless he is toying me again. we'll see.i can't quite figure him out.
-makeup
-new ideas on how to transform my look to be more attractive that i think i'm going to do
-yoga
-going to meet the person for work. it went really well! and boosted my confidence even if she doesn't call but i think she will
-doing things that are different and will make people wonder
-sleep
-having a slightly darker skin tone now
-changing the part in my hair
-feeling clean
-music
-style
-deciding not to tell creative director about D..or best friend. they think he's a bonehead after all i've said,so i want to keep it on the down low for now that i'm still talking to him and agreed to meet him still....even i feel nervous,like what am i doing. on one hand,he seems to really like me,but on the other,i just don't know. and,i feel i won't until we meet in person.if we ever do.
-having a place to live
-meditation
-changing history
-cute socks
-social media
-my winter hat
-heat
-feeling prettier when i take the effort versus being lazy
-my spiritual realization about dissolving fear and choosing love to feel love
-my ideas
-the things i create
-feeling comfortable and cozy
-feeling in an overall pleasant mood today
-the sun and sitting on the porch for ten minutes even though it was freezing,the fresh air and sun felt good
-being resourceful
-being in tune with certain others in ways that is very mysterious
-my back and neck ache finally being gone. somehow.
-cool things to discover
-waking up earlier today
-beauty