Being able to see spirit energy in my peripheral vision with my eyes closed is what really matters. I've received messages from Oracle cards that imply that doing this will activate what is best described as a very important spiritual transformation that I've been trying to undergo, but I just can't do it. I'm to prone to doubt and fear and if I'm going to do this I need to find some way of reaching a point where I can't back iut of it. Being able to back out of it is the thing that always prevents me from doing this.