I've had trouble getting to sleep and thought I'd try some meditation to help relax into sleep.

I didn't know much about it, I had tried the generic "mindfullness" stuff that is currently trending in companies and had some trouble with intrusive thoughts, so I gave up. But I did find the "put-it-in-a-box" method useful in day-to-day life for things I didn't want to think about. Lately I had begun to wonder about the nature of free will and looked up a little bit about philosophy, remote viewing and different kinds of meditation on YouTube out of curiosity.

Then when I was having trouble sleeping and I'd been trying all sorts of things to get to sleep, I asked my husband what to try this time and he said "I dunno, meditate?". So I ended up trying Vipanassana/insight meditation to get to sleep, thinking it was just a relaxation technique similar to mindfullness and the "insights" might give me something better to focus on instead of random thoughts. I was nice and relaxed but still kind of too "aware" for sleep and then unexpectedly got sucked up this vortex thing into a very peaceful void. Then I went "whoa!" and opened my eyes and it was gone. I mean it was a nice place to end up, but totally unexpected! The vortex thing was sudden and freaky! In searching for answers, I've stumbled on the Astral Dynamics book and just finished reading it.

So from reading it, I think the problem is now I've got a bit of a psychological flinch with regards to falling asleep. I recall that vaguely spinning, starting to get "sucked up" feeling and flinch and roll over because I'm scared of the vortex ride. Eventually I get to sleep, but sometimes it's taking me a long time and then I haven't gotten enough rest by the morning. Reading and getting some knowledge on the topic has helped, but also reminded me of "the dweller" from my childhood dreams so still feeling a bit scared/put-off as well because honestly I still don't know much about this stuff and just want to go to sleep.

I tried leaving the light on like the book suggests and it helps a bit. It suggests ceasing practice with energy work, but I don't normally practice energy work or meditation. Haven't noticed much difference with shower and a full stomach. Lying on different sides is a bit awkward because it cramps up my shoulders sometimes. I'm not sure what to do, I guess I could stop even reading about it and learning on YouTube as well and hope to forget? Another thing I was wondering if it was a sign I should lean into it and overcome the fear as it seems a bunch of stuff lined up for it to happen in the first place? Or should I be working on better control of my thoughts?

I'd be really grateful for any advice or suggestions how to get to sleep, thank you!