Dream about someone I love

LizEmerson · 9th November 2007, 02:38 AM

I'm in love with someone I'm not allowed to be. It's a professional environment. It's technically against the rules.

Anyway, I had a dream that the person I'm in love with hugged me and wouldn't let go and looked deep into my eyes. It was the most "real" dream I've ever had. It's the first time I've been in a dream and I slapped my face to try to wake myself up. It was actually kind of funny, I've never done that in a dream.
Needless to say, the slaps didn't wake me up, but I did remember the dream vividly. It was so real!

What do you all think about it? Do you think I need to tell this person I really like her, even though it's against the rules. I have no idea what to do, b/c I think she likes me too.

**Korpo** · 9th November 2007, 10:26 AM

First - what a freaky work environment!

Can you afford to find another job or do you depend on it? Would you chose this job over having the chance for a happy relationship?

I think in the dream world it should be allowed to let go, to express positive feelings and to connect. If you dream of her again, why not enjoy the love you feel are denied?

When you become lucid, why not ask the dream character about advice: "How can I heal this situation?" - "Should I approach this person?" - "What are you trying to tell me?". Access your subconscious directly when given this chance.

Maybe it wasn't even a dream. It's great "sense of reality" my point to something more akin to a projection. Then asking makes even more sense!

Take good care,
Oliver

**journyman161** · 9th November 2007, 11:49 AM

Well, I guess you're from a repressed part of the US. If your nic is indicative of your sex, maybe it's the same sex issue that makes it a difficult thing rather than a work rule?

You should realise it is not OK to allow others to dictate your life. In this world of the 21st century, there are laws against what you are saying is happening to you.

Time for courage. Find out if she likes you; you don't need to get into relationship level to go share some time with her. Be courageous, be confident & above all, realise you have a life even if she isn't interested.

**Mishell** · 9th November 2007, 02:50 PM

Originally Posted by journyman161

You should realise it is not OK to allow others to dictate your life. In this world of the 21st century, there are laws against what you are saying is happening to you.

The last place I worked had rules against co-workers dating. It was not allowed, and they did fire people for it. It might seem like that should be against the law, but it is not.

**Neil Templar** · 9th November 2007, 04:43 PM

I left a good job because i fell in love with my boss-she felt the same.the new job was no way as rewarding,and the relationship only lasted for 2 years,but i never regretted the move-those were two of the happiest years of my life.i learned so much about life/myself/relationships in that time,and i have a lifelong friend who i'll never loose touch with.
if feelings are true they shouldn't be suppressed,IMO.

LizEmerson · 12th November 2007, 02:54 AM

Thanks for the replies, everybody!

Modern rules against dating are strange. Companies/Universities are allowed to make these rules but they do seem to violate our Constitutional right to free association.

What can we do? It's all about money and who would get sued. They want to avoid law suits as much as possible.

As far as the same-sex thing goes, it doesn't bother me (even though I still consider myself straight), it just adds to the confusion.

**journyman161** · 12th November 2007, 03:37 AM

Does the US have any Government bodies who will monitor & take action on civil rights abuses? You could ring or email them with the situation & get them to advise you.

Given recent history in the US, I'd guess civil rights have gone out the window but it's worth a try.

**CFTraveler** · 12th November 2007, 01:39 PM

This is not so straightforward. Dating rules are usually in place before someone is hired, and they are notified of them before they are hired. Then there is the potential for sexual harrassment- most office affairs are between supervisors and their subordinates, and anytime there is a disparity in power there is the potential for abuse.
I don't think there's anything wrong with people of laterally equal job descriptions dating, actually I know many married people that met at work, but I have never seen the supervisor/subordinate thing work out anywhere. Usually someone ends up fired, pressured to quit, or worse things than that. So if you look closely, you'll see that in the US companies institute rules agains dating your boss or your subordinate.
Also, having a job is not a right, so the issue of civil rights is shaky there.