29/Apr/2012
Groundhog Day (Movie) In The Portal

Opening remarks: The last lucidventure from a week ago really haunted me in a way. It felt like unfinished business and I don't like unfinished business. So I did a lot of affirmations and imprinting of "Punin" and "I bring the kids home", etc.

I even googled this video during my research last week. I watched it over and over again to make a visual imprint of the area. And just btw, isn't it rather strange that such a video of a guy transporting some kids with a bike in Punin exists, huh??? Yes, I know well that I will have go to an astral version of Punin and not the RTZ, but visualisation is useful anyway.

I decided I want to and can do this 'retrieval' or whatever 'test' it is (Be it 'real' or not - it's a test anyway, and the test is 'real' indeed). I wanted to do this and still want to. Problem is that I did not manage to do any kind of exit so far since then, didn't even come close. Tonight I took, almost in an act of desperation, Galantamine and B-Vitamins again. Here's what happened:

I exited ouf of my bed in my Astral Portal 4 times. The process almost repeated itself all the time. It felt like the Groundhog Day movie, going through it over and over again, but with slight variations. The visuals were always bad and shady. Two times, however, I could not see a lot, especially when I flew out of the window I was blind again. One time it felt like I had bandages or some kind of medical tape on my lower legs (from the feet up to the knee) of which I had to get rid first by unstrapping them, losing precious time thereby.

One time, I asked for a helper and a hand held my left arm (nothing unusual, though), but nothing really decisive happened. I forgot to try that technique for gaining vision which I was taught before by my guides.

My greatest problem, however, was to remember what I wanted to do. I had forgotten my target. I was fighting hard to recapture my memory, really hard, because I KNEW it was important. It is so frustrating to leave half of one's mind behind. So I was hovering there outside and tried and kept talking to myself 'I wanted to do sth imporant ... remember .. it was .... what was it .. it had to do with ... er ... well ... what?'

During the last of the 4 exits I must have made some progress as I remembered it had to do sth with kids. I then flew down into the garden. In this garden (still all was very dusky) I saw beautiful flowers that are not there in the physical. I don' even know if they exist in this world. Most of them were giant violet flowers, some with giant white petals.

Then I was in bed the 5th time and I finally remembered that I wanted to help 'retrieve' the kids and bring them to Punin. It was too late though. I now felt my physical body in my physical bed and woke up. Before that, still in half-sleep, upon forcedly waking up I told myself: "I won't give up. Tonight another try, and then another, and another.... I will make it. I did it before with Ronald. And I made a promise now. Sooner or later I won't fail."

Comments / Afterthoughts

Well, at least the flowers were quite nice.