GRATITUDE LIST

[buttercup]

-kale
-vitamin k
-how slimmed out i'm getting and detoxed and flaws going away. i feel so much more confident in my appearance. and,i haven't had an actual workout in about a week! i will finally today,though.
-my eyeglasses
-the internet
-feeling in a good mood today
-feeling like i have more time today
-getting great news that makes me feel finally i'm moving along with things of finding out my bank account is now open and checks and card is on the way. and getting a piece of mail yesterday randomly that i was able to use to send them proof of address. so great and makes me feel more calm about things now.
-the white bedsheet and how zen and classy it looks
-great books and how amazing this book is i'm reading
-ice cold water
-feeling more confident in creating new desires as if i'm in a blank canvas space now from purging spiritually and doing the inner work
-great music i discover
-sportsbras
-pronoia and how amazing it finding all these little deals and things as if leading me to do things i want to do or find information i've been looking for. like little miracles.so great.
-inspiration
-my body
-now that that room is cleared,feeling calmer,more settled,and able to take on other things and have more time.
-my face
-optimism
-smiling
-sportsbras
-stylish fitness wear
-style
-newfound confidence in achieving things
-living next to the the railroad and public transit trains and how peaceful they sound
-the airconditioner
-mercy
-healing
-being in a state and priming myself for newness
-wanderlust
-how amazing and healthy my teeth are
-fascination with life
-deciding instead of strict making things happen to instead let some things sort of change naturally so i'm not fighting against resistances
-the amazing inner shift feeling during meditation that tells you something is "done."
-feeling empowered
-embracing the mystery
-new things to do and try and explore
-play
-awareness and reflection
-being sexy
-appreciation for simple casual moments,such as reading my book on the bed,while listening to house chill out music with the cat laying on the bed beside me
-the feeling that things are going to get really good soon
-appreciation for the moment and trust in it
-clean eating

[buttercup]

-this especially good tibetan singing bowls audio which sounds summery and has nightime crickets sound playing in the background. love it.
-massage
-my beauty
-deciding to join a new online social network last night and already seeing benefits from it
-an interesting experience last night of D popping into my mind as i joined,and plus he popped in the other day and then this morning,he followed me on there. my first follower,and still only one. kind of funny,and very odd. our last time we spoke was in a fight where i then blocked him from a different social network and so now this,so it's kind of weird.
-my style
-sportsbras
-my body
-my bed
-deciding to buy a pedicure
-new ideas of things to help my energy and goals
-feeling in a new chapter and how freeing and new it feels
-great music
-the room being done,and also did the bookshelf today
-interesting experiences
-shedding away layers of myself and becoming new
-water
-feeling good in my feminine energy
-stretches
-facial yoga
-ideas
-awareness when something feels off and altering it
-surrender
-being able to express myself
-freedom
-fascination with life
-the law of attraction
-mercy
-high vibrations
-nice cleansing showers that make me feel good
-how amazing and healthy my teeth are
-that compared to one week ago,things are more moved forward and settled.
-lovely feelings

[buttercup]

-getting all the cat's knots out today! such a sense of accomplishment for them to finally be gone
-someone i worked with in my early day's of my career inviting me to their party. perfect timing!
-the new social media i joined and how great i'm enjoying it and how much easier it is to use one phone
-the internet
-body being nice and slimmed out today and for some reason appetite being supressed
-being admired.
-feeling and being more productive today!
-mason jars and putting some of my espresso in it today as i went for a quick trip to the park
-sunshine
-gong for a nice short walk to the park and how energizing it was,
-an amazing workout last night.i exceeded how long i intended to work out for but it felt amazing and made me feel strong again. it is so great to move
-body being very slightly sore today.
-waking up no longer feeling sick.i had a headache and stomach ache and felt so weak yesterday that i even skipped my green smoothie.i think it was detox but today i felt amazing and well again.
-the sense of newness i feel and how amazing that is to carve our something new and not feel stuck
-getting some work done today
-getting closet cleaned,about half way finished right now
-creativity
-feeling back to myself
-things feeling settled
-healing,even the aspects of self we think aren't very important but are just repressed.
-patience
-life truths i keep in mind such as letting yourself get uncomfortable from time to time as a key to change ,etc,etc
-finally getting warm water to work last night and having a more normal shower
-fascination with life and how weird and dream like it is,like today a baby was stuck in a car and best friend and neighbor and the father had to get it out,and did of course. so surreal.
-dancing
-things to look forward to
-watching in awe as things finally start to come and click together.
-great songs to listen to that make you feel feelings
-reflective thoughts that are interesting

[buttercup]

i experienced an epiphany and miracle in one day. so thankful..
-i was in the gas station parking lot. a mundane enough moment recoiling from having canceled something and arguing with someone else and feeling kind of bad but not in the worst mood.oddly enough,it was the same gas station from may that i was in at night,after a drive,like tonight,and back then i had subtle epiphanies at that spot which then led me to that movie that night i randomly watched and then that book which changed me. it was just subtle voice that came out of nowwhere,that told me to stop doing so much spiritual work or stop doing spiritual work something like that.i grasped it right away. it was so odd and simple and automatic,the way it came to me and i after pieced it together as my soul telling me it's time to stop doing so much spiritual work and go out and live. stop waiting to come to some certain place of spiritual contentment before i live,and to just go live now,and take actions. this has actually been a block of mine...feeling like i need to keep reaching a certain point of spiritual contentment before i live. idk when i've become like this,i didn't used to be like this..i used to look forward to the next thing.....and of course healing comes from the things.i need to just go out and take care of what i want,and stop complicating it so much. the happiest people aren't always the most spiritual of people....and a spiritual person or not spiritual person can have spiritual insights come to them at the most mundane of moments,guiding them.
-and....a miracle...idk why i'm primed for being so in tune today..it was a mundane enough day,i didn't feel i was very surrendered or having the hardest of times..or did anything special spiritually...i was home on the internet and just went on facebook for a minute...and came across an interesting article headline from a mainstream site.i didn't think i was in the mood to read but clicked anyways thinking i'd skim it and in the beginning quickly realized what i was coming across and felt an eerie feeling,and a quietness knowing an idea of what i was coming across. it included a picture quote that was serendiptious. it was emotionally moving and i found myself in tears.i had just recently been questioning(like yesterday)if some things i discovered last year that are very advanced spiritually are just too out there,and silly but decided to continue believing. these concepts were very important to deep healing for me last year and so seeing right after i questioned it all,an article about it in a mainstream site that i didn't think i'd see the concept at was shocking to me. it's a random concept that moves me deeply,the concept of time,from an outsider's perspective it seems bizarre. it's very advanced deeper down the rabbit hole stuff,but it has personal significance to me. last year,i got profound serendipity too after discovering these concepts that elaborated the loa to new lengths for me that made so much sense but were deeper then i had known was possible.it let me know i was on the right track with another aspect of this stuff. anything really is possible. anything.i can wake up tomorrow to a miracle! and,the mundane of moments can carry miracles. this was very meaningful to me.considering the law of attraction,which i've never doubted as it's one thing that's always made so much sense to me,we can prime and manipulate reality to manifest ANYTHING and it's amazingly interesting to think of the possibilities. and,WHY do i always forget this? Why does the "amnesia" always happen? i've manifested so many random miracles in my life that were no doubt it was from law of attraction,yet we always seem to forget. it's like we just have to reach deep and high enough to see how ridiculously ok all really is...so many amazing things i can't even find the words to express because it's that out there and abstract. it's like the things deepest and quietest that flicker to us as possibilities are truths.
-my eyeglasses
-the nightskies tonight and getting a good amount of time outside enjoying them
-simplicity
-getting in a workout
-this amazing tibetan singing bowl audio i'm now listening to
-less is more
-simple spirituality
-makeup
-water
-not believing in regrets
-the cat being here and how cool he is,his personality is very intriguing to me
-the quiet
-how good it feels to do "nothing"
-living more west now
-finding out from roommate that neighbor introduced himself and talked to him and mentioned his gf and how interesting that was considering he was the one neighbor that night of moving in i didn't like and got bad vibe about so hearing he introduced himself and mentioned that night was interesting psychically and reassuring that he seemed normal and how much of a community it seems over here compared to the last place. it's tiny here,this area,but everyone seems to know one another,and is very safe seeming.
-how different life feels now compared to a month ago and appreciating it now. that,is now a different chapter.
-feeling settled
-becoming braver again

[buttercup]

-being alive
-following what i'm drawn to;gut instincts
-the internet
-affirmations
-tofu
-coffee
-water
-my funky print pants
-a nicely shaped body
-physical exercise
-being able to move my body
-beauty and breakthroughs in the breakdown and the clarity that comes from them. breaking through major walls and experiencing the truth in that it's darkest before the dawn.
-gratitude
-forgiveness and mercy
-allowing mystery
-patience
-food
-my lavender oil
-lavender tea
-acknowledging real problems and that it's time overcome them
-naps
-being brave
-my persistence
-putting myself out there even though it's scary
-getting my eyebrows threaded today
-support and reassurance
-forgiveness and mercy on others
-my artistic eye
-being a great writer
-knowing my self and what my soul needs
-getting my haircolor refreshed with new tones perfect for autumn
-seeing things clearly now
-great music
-my eyeglasses
-being beautiful
-loving myself and being consistent with it
-doing whats right for me
-taking tough lessons and learning from them
-pronoia
-great books
-lip balms
-social medias
-the swift forceful energy i've been utililizing lately to move into a new direction
-the sun
-an interesting talk that something came out of last night with best friend
-getting my orange quartz so quick and getting a free amethyst with it
-getting my required mails to go renew my state id
-that things are getting done now. all the crazy overwhelment is not only settled and just about complete from july and early august,but i just have a positive and peaceful feeling that i will be changed in a glorious and beautiful way by september
-remembering i create my reality and to focus and alter better!
-ordering a large print of art from my transitioned loved one since i had wanted to do that and create a alter of peace for awhile and thinking the other day will it just be one of those things i never get around to
-realizing i kind of had an alter already at the last place in the window area of the living room,as pictures of her including a large one and framed one were already there,and my favorite little things tend to had been accumluated over there,and i'd regularly have flowers over there...it's kind of wonderful seeing how life works out. it wasn't an official alter,but technically kind of was one without me really trying. life always does work itself out...
-colors
-newness
-realizing in aftermaths of things how silly and overclouded my perceptions had been. it showed me i really needed help and something has changed in me and is wrong with me. my fears had felt so real in the moment. i'm now overcoming this and am so grateful. it had been bubbling beneath the surface rising to be resolved.
-those who support and believe in me
-how good it's going to get
-throwing things away at a faster pace after all that's happened and making me realize i need to own only about 20% of what i actually own
-embracing things moving more swiftly after all that's happened and realizing i may move again very soon. this is showing me that to really be in the flow and with all that goes on,how much more to simplify my life and just throw all my things away and embrace things changing at a quick notice.i really like this.
-using negativity to drive me swiftly towards something different
-observing reality and noticing interesting things,and interesting changes
-beauty products
-focusing more on beauty again
-the little walk i went on this morning
-having great teeth
-going tanning again and how helpful it's been and i feel even boosted my appearance somehow too.
-going to my favorite park the other day and how nice it was to just sit on the hill
-freedom

[buttercup]

-great music
-inspiration
-evolution
-a nice meditation
-lemongrass incense
-who i'm transforming into and becoming
-putting myself out there again and being brave
-art
-vegan food
-eating at home and deciding to go back to eating at home more again since it makes me feel better. out food tends to too oily which makes me look worse,and feel drained
-my eyeglasses
-my thigh gap
-how beautiful my hair color is
-a new look
-getting out a bit
-the sun
-finding my transitioned one's toy and bringing it out to play with the cat until i get a new one since i misplaced his and how that made my mood better
-summer clothes
-fashion
-my style
-my vision
-seeing things that have gotten me excited to go to
-breaking free of anxieties about certain things and how that breakdown the other day,really did break down a barrier for me and how i feel more free to do certain things i didn't before
-good books
-light dumbells which make me feel strong
-inspiring people and inspiring creations
-interesting things to do and explore and all the things i want to do and try
-getting hair cut appointment made
-easing up on things a bit with feeling like i need to hurry and do everything and do it quick and instead remembering to just stay focused but go ahead and relax a bit so i don't get overwhelmed
-the feeling of things being new and changed and a blank canvas
-feeling at peace now being out of the last apartment
-how good it feels to be in a new chapter and place and the mystery of it and the contentment feeling of having overcome and completed certain things
-the air filter in here which seems to make things less stuff
-mason jars
-loving myself
-reflection and being ok with the gap now of no longer longing and wondering over certain things such as E.
-having found a new tool for getting in touch with intuition. tarot blocked intuition even when not taking it seriously and now to get back in touch with it in a more empowering and legit way,i've started pulling out a notebook during meditation and just writing insights that come,and occasionally asking questions during. most get answered,some do not and just seems to tell me it's not the right time for me to know,and that it ok. i feel a connection with my higher self finally strengthening again from stopping tarot. yes,some may not like me for this,but it is my opinion that tarot is bad for you,even if you do believe in loa and think you are using it in alignment with loa.
-becoming at peace with me neighborhood more,like,i think my neighborhood is actually becoming "cool" which is strange and interesting.

[buttercup]

-the color white,white sheets,walls,etc
-crystal singing bowl audios
-getting my haircut today and feeling renewed,like a new me,and the salon being stylish and inspiring and my hairstylist making me feel very good about myself and actually having good things to say about my hair.i also just felt very attractive and my energy softer so it's been nice.
-getting a coffee and snack and feeling in a good mood after haircut
-my bravery paving through my fears and creating new
-patience
-tuning into my desires
-having a nice toned body with perfect curves that gives me the body of a playboy model
-becoming more comfortable with expressing myself and being myself
-mom coming by finally
-feeling more comfortable in new place
-my eyeglasses
-getting to salon early when i thought i'd be late
-the great book i've been reading
-finding deals that seem to be calling to me,related to my interests as if the universe is urging me to follow it
-feeling free and having a natural,not forced or aggressive desire to do something i've not done in awhile because of my anxieties. it's like a block was just magically cleared the other day and is amazing. as much as i love certain work ive done,i find blocks don't need a month to clear,perse and have stopped doing the processes,at least for now.i may go back to them,but i rather let blocks be cleared naturally by just being me and living fully and doing simple meditations where i get in touch with my soul and just living my soul path.
-my style
-fashion
-dumbells
-getting some dishes done
-giving away some things to mom i don't want
-feeling a difference in how safe i feel in the last few days
-simplicity
-becoming more fearless,feminine,and ease
-smiling
-being a new me
-using my free time with more soul nourishing distractions now
-beauty
-this air filter in the living room
-how amazingly good it feels to be in this new phase now

[buttercup]

-electricity
-eyeglasses
-water
-having a salad with dinner. getting my greens!
-connecting the dots and seeing how my breakdown which created a breakthrough happened shortly after my massage and same day as i got that healing crystal i was drawn to in the mail..
-accepting and loving the madness
-my beautiful hair
-my youthful face
-my perfect eyebrows
-going for a glorious walk today that was sunny,and a long walk compared to usual lately,and filled with lovely sights of flowers,a river,the downtown city scape,gritty bridge and then two blocks away from home,a little park. it was lovely.
-my hobbies and interests that keep me entertained and benefit me such as taking pictures
-being so over certain things
-feeling drawn to certain things
-things i am excited about
-being natural and going with the flow
-becoming softer,i now notice myself speaking in a softer voice and becoming softness like those peaceful people who work at spas and teach yoga. it seems such a feminine energy i am transmuting to.
-the air filter in here
-the air conditioner
-the vibration of the house raising,i feel
-how amazingly toned my legs look and slim
-men who defend women
-going shopping today
-crystal singing bowl audios
-feeling more safe again
-logic
-coffee
-sleep getting better,as in i'm actually sleeping,and sleeping deeply. next up,to get my sleeping on a better schedule.
-pronoia
-beautiful flowers
-selective curation

[buttercup]

-drinking a liter of water upon waking. i haven't been drinking much water lately so felt good to do that
-clothes
-my beautiful flowers which are just so striking
-after back and forth indecision,going back to a photo i deleted,and adding a white border,and it became the one. perfect. and that whole back and forth inspired me
-thoughtful,selective curation and how good i am with it
-quotes that come to me during life moments that i love
-being brave
-sleep,and that i'm able to sleep,even if i'm sleeping like a rock.
-going on the porch for some time today
-clean,organized spaces
-my hair and how beautiful it is
-trying out valerian root for the first time last night and so far,so great. after 15 minutes,i did feel almost a feeling as if stoned then tired like i wanted to go to sleep.
-my cheekbones and how perfect they are
-how glowy,and bright my skin,and young looking
-thin,toned legs and a thigh gap
-having large wide eyes
-eyeglasses
-getting a part ordered for my laptop today
-crystal singing bowl audios
-social media
-more and more coming to me reminding me of the subjective nature of reality and loa and flickers of insight coming to me that "truth" can change in an instant,depending on my belief in it...and i've SEEN this happen before. It's this right here that is why i don't believe in intuition the way most people do. I've had freaky things that proved that something so concrete had changed
-clarity lately.
-lip balms
-things i'm excited for in the future
-that the cat seems better lately
-taking things one at a time,and letting go and being in the flow instead of thinking of all that needs to get done and worrying about getting it all done,and the order of it all,etc,etc
-pronoia
-entertainment
-getting some work done today
-feeling relaxed
-being settled
-in a phase of newness now
-how amazing and healthy my teeth are
-being unique
-being smart
-how nice and hard my nails are
-how cute and amusing the cat is
-a place to live
-my mind
-the law of attraction
-mercy,forgiveness,and compassion
-subjective reality

[buttercup]

-the cat
-relaxing
-seeing and becoming aware that i'm going through a cleansing
-inspiring people
-getting a little work done
-clarity that comes from chaos
-my face looking bright and young and my cheekbones looking amazing
-my haircut
-laying down
-healing
-getting my print today
-water
-kale
-nightskies and air after a storm