GRATITUDE LIST

[buttercup]

-getting groceries today
-getting beautiful deep red flower
-best friend becoming more honest again
-getting into mental influence again and doing a session before bed that made me feel better
-the cat being here
-how funny the cat is
-a delicious nourishing vegan dinner
-best friend applying to jobs on his own he told me about
-calming down about some things
-higher vibration ways of thinking
-sleeping good today
-laughing
-feeling more confident again
-having fun with emojis
-having direction with where i want to go this year
-yoga pants
-clearing all the blocks i have this past weeks
-all my manifesting success stories this week that have made me feel empowered during a really low time,and made me feel the fun again and connection.
-panic attack subliminals ive been doing that i'm almost done with
-best friend calming down a little bit
-me being in a really peaceful,calm mood most of the day and being naturally detached from l most of the day
-seeing a poignant,powerful article i enjoyed about detaching from a quantum physics perspective and how a watched pot never boils which came during my detachment too and was helpful to see at the timing i did
-getting stricter seeing with ease and having it come to me what i've done wrong,and am doing wrong such as seeing i say i want this,but keep complaining(thus focusing) on something completely else.
-inspiration
-getting a little work done today
-food prices seeming cheaper

[buttercup]

-how amazing my carnations smell and the beautiful deep red color
-getting a pic i like finally of them
-that i'm getting through the winter
-focusing on the progress
-great ideas
-feeling like i really rewired my subconscious last night about a topic i did EFT and speaking affirmations on. I just felt very confident and knowing and in a very excited high energy mood
-sleep
-feeling physically better again
-best friend seeming normal
-that i'm closer then i think to meeting my goal of knowing how to drive in a parking lot.
-how freaking adorable the cat is
-my phone
-food
-having a coffee and toaster strudel for breakfast and skipping the soda which was improvement and not even craving it
-taking pics with my phone and how fun it is
-emojis
-feeling so moved forward internally about things now and newfound direction and clarity and wanting the fun in life
-being smart
-becoming really good at knowing high vibe spiritual concepts
-how amazing the book i've been reading has been
-roommate taking out the trash for me
-roommate putting the heat on higher for me which helped since it's been so cold in here
-drinking a nice mason jar of water upon waking
-that i am meeting goals
-that i'm staying dedicated to my happiness
-how tight and thin my body looks today
-how much more my energy has changed and become more feminine since this time last year without trying
-all the barriers i've broken through since december
-feeling gratitude in my heart for the desires i've manifested
-feeling nice and cleansed
-sweaters
-kind of getting better at detachment
-vision board pics and quotes for my subconscious
-feeling cool again and deciding that's where i want to go
-that i will slide back into ease like i had in 2010
-my will getting a little stronger
-my beauty
-kitchen being clean
-how nice it is that my mom no longer needs to come by
-that best friend has been applying to new classes and has been getting calls now
-deciding for us to try seeing him take a week off from reiki.i want to stop giving power to things outside myself and may do some tapping on tarot too tonight since i still check on that despite not believing in it and knowing it only makes things worse
-getting good at clearing bad energy and becoming empowered and less superstisious
-how energized and cleansed i feel after EFT and speaking affirmations
-the computer
-my bed
-realizing how paranoid i can be and clearing that
-beauty
-believing in happiness more and more again
-how ambitious and goal oriented i am compare to the average person.

[buttercup]

-men
-things to smile about and be optimistic about
-crystal singing bowl audios
-my current book i've been reading
-photos of myself i am happy with,and having a lot of new fashion/body photos
-being really high energy,strong willed and in the vortex for a few hours this morning. felt amazing.i was feeling it real and all felt within my grasp. reality felt so easily malleable.
-makeup
-seeing a photo of myself and seeing my breasts do look really large which made me feel better since i got insecure the other day about even though they're big,maybe if they were even bigger it'd be better
-remembering i can do affirmations to make my breasts even bigger
-remembering details about l that show he is such a "stalker" and was studying the heck out of me with all the things he somehow knew about me and brought up that sometimes even made no sense. it always felt like he thought he knew me very well
-my creativity
-great ideas
-my goals and ambition
-being ok with just laying down and doing nothing sometimes,like today
-being ok with being kind of lazy since it was really cold yesterday,and today got my time of the month
-being feminine and how great that feels and how much more feminine my energy feels compared to 8 months ago.
-remembering ideas of loving myself and allowing myself to just feel good and to just be which is also so good for my energy
-best friend talking to me a little bit more in the daytime
-getting my power back a little bit again with best friend
-best friend having some kind of interview today
-my beautiful apartment
-how good it feels to surrender and trust all is working out for me
-cayenne pepper
-drinking a glass of mason jar of water upon waking
-having chocolate in the fridge that i will have with tea later
-ethical food companies
-color
-the ability to see
-my eyeglasses
-having a stronger belief in the things in the awesome things i am attracting into my reality
-the string for the cat i found to play with
-having a huge emotional limiting block/belief come into my awareness last night. and doing some eft tapping on it. it was one of those ones that becomes instantly cleared once recognized,which most or all are unless the true limiting belief is actually underneath what you think is the limiting belief
-being beautiful
-doing speaking affirmation sessions last night and how great it felt
-becoming more appreciative towards best friend
-being classy
-my sense of style
-hair ties
-getting the bathroom cleaned last night
-face moisturizer
-knowing i'm going to win
-allowing my wounds to help me to become better,more resourceful,and so on
-groundbreaking ideas about how to even beat apathy which came to me which has always been the worst feeling and hardest one to get out of. felt apathy recently,and had an idea of just sitting with it and from that allowing something else to bloom out of it
-seeing how i observed things into my reality..even how things don't make sense,unless i literally observed it and that's why and see how there was some focus that created it
-doing good about cutting down on talking about l or speaking about him.i don't think i spoke about him once,if i did it's been a lot more minimal.
-best friend going almost 48 hours without "reiki."
-realizing earlier today also from intention that i can and how easy it is be just as good "reiki" as he is and seeing how if it's something i think is ok,i could start playing with it
-feeling strong positive feelings again,that almost seems out of nowwhere
-great,uplifting inspiring music

[buttercup]

-my ear feeling a lot better today and normal pretty much
-how adorable the cat is
-feeling a sense of relaxation i always get during that time of the month
-soda
-indian food
-that amazing manifestation i had with A the other day that still feels surreal yet oddly normal and like i shifted to a new reality
-my beauty
-how inspiring today was.i seen on social media A is doing something amazing and starting a non profit charity. it really inspired me to do more and be more.i had no idea he had that much depth or care for others. it was surprising to see. i also seen he just got his passport and i am planning that,too as one of my goals.
-getting a tank top ordered to add to my wardrobe
-the string toy for the cat
-how beautiful the cat's babydoll eye's are
-getting grocery items and laundry changed dropped off to me
-getting the load of laundry done i needed
-the amazing epiphany i had about people and our perceptions and how we create people to be the way they are by our perceptions that i wrote about on another forum and how it really inspired me to utilize the loa in a very profound way since people are such a common part of most manifestations,this was a very important thing to really think about and realize
-pillows
-getting a little work done
-being forgiving to myself
-all the EFT i did last night and affirmations
-being almost done with my panic subliminals
-being more detached
-feeling so feminine and beautiful and how much my energy has changed in that sense since this time last year.i just naturally feel it since clearing work i had done
-all my goals which excite me
-motivation,inspiration,and determination
-a driving lesson tomorrow i'll have since i couldn't do today which will be longer and enable me to complete my goal of parking lots before the month is over in one last swoop instead of several little sessions
-yoga
-blankets
-fashion
-clarity and forward movement and rejuvenation about life and where i want to go
-inspiration vision board pics i use for my phone and online forum i'm on
-laying out my l issue in writing on another loa forum and realizing it doesn't sound as bad as i think and sounds very much like guy likes me a lot and was just hurt
-all the positive changes i am creating for myself and limiting beliefs/barriers i'm breaking through
-getting a follow up on upcoming job today which made me happy
-sleep
-knowing im going to win
-feeling more confident about myself again
-the hot tea with cinnamon sticks and chocolate i had last night that was very soothing
-deciding to be more loving towards myself
-drinking a nice mason jar of water upon waking
-being a trendy,fashionable person
-being safe

[buttercup]

-doing my panic subliminals
-that i'm trying to stay in a good mood and be strong and positive
-seeming to get through to best friend some more with my conviction
-that i tried contacting l one more time saying we should talk and now i know i've done all i can. i'm grateful i'm someone who tries to figure out what the problem is and be communicative so i don't look back wondering if could've done more. he replied saying about what and then i said about how weird things got and he never responsed. each text we sent the other was spaced out by hours.i can't help but take a hint and let go after tonight if he doesn't respond and try to talk it out. he will have lost me for good. he liked me and wanted me for so long and was so close to having me.
-soda pop
-doing really good with my driving lesson today. doing a lot more then i thought i would and feeling like i definitely mastered parking lots today. i turned,reversed,drove by others,etc. it felt good to do that and know i'm achieving my goals
-getting out of the house today
-cat seeming happier today
-finding an interesting movie i might want to watch sometime
-deciding to post a work pic on social media
-that i'm not going to give up,even i am having troubles still with certain things.
-that i'm still really,really,really inspired and that the journey of turning each pain into a blissful reward has become my mission and passion
-my beauty
-deciding to start loving myself more,also since that ALWAYS raises my vibe and attracts good things
-law of attraction forums which really help me to get my vibe up
-being able to see the underneath beliefs causing so and so things
-adding up the money best friend must be making and seeing things should be ok
-finding a deal on a dance class i want
-knowing that all the stuff i say i believe is real,even if there's still some subconscious conflict i'm cleaning up and things in my external reality to match up
-doing a speaking affirmation session which boosted my mood. that alone should show it's doing something
-yoga
-that i AM changing my reality for the better
-a cafe i really want to stop by and try soon close by
--laying down
-the power i have,by doing what i do for a living with my first career
-infusing meaning into why i have some of my goals that may seem superficial and how important that meaning can be sometimes,because it gives a why,and a connection which can strengthen the will
-sort of reflecting on connection,and what it means to me so i can infuse it into my life and make my life better.i think this is very solar plexus related. for so long until recently,i hadn't bothered to CONNECT with my desires. i just wanted them which kept it weak. i didn't connect with opportunities. i just felt more of a disconnect.i'd then find the things that meant something to me in the past started to lose their connection and seem more dull and i realized that connection is so important. to connect with what you want,and to feel connected. otherwise,it feels pointless which puts a sort of block on manifestation. i used to feel so connected to life and God by the beauty of manifesting someone from my past,or someone new,and so on.i even for sometime created it that i always manifested back exes for example and it was easy to, then finding it hard to pull anything towards me. i'd take for granted the past excitement.i used to just feel so connected to life and excited and didn't care if others judged something as how miraculous it was to manifest someone back. it had meaning to me. it made me feel more unconditional love for all things,until little by little i lost the connection to opportunities and life,and my desires and started to judge with apathy getting excited and KNOWING someone is around the corner.i even wrote on a forum i feel silly doing inner work because i don't want to seem obsessive about someone. but,i can do inner work without getting obsessive. i need that excitement and connection again. that's one big thing i'm infusing a lot more of into everything in my life. that's what my life has missed. excitement is like something magic.im even going to start inducing it on a regular basis until i start feeling it more on my own.i used to have more excitement for life and my desires and connected with them and also a stronger will and even a bit of sexual energy which i think is very spiritual. now,it's been almost 3 years since i had sex with someone new. that is not a coincidence. that's a connection. there's been some sort of important loa/power/youth life force thing missing from me. my favorite things to intend i had stopped intending like guys and beauty because i thought it was superficial even though it made me happiest and brought me vibe high and made other areas of life really good,too.i see where my blockages are and have come from though and am cleaning and recreating a new me going back to early parts of my spiritual awakening while mixing in new,more evolved parts of course. back then,i had innocence. this is also key. i am getting there,though.i am getting better. i've cleaned up quite a bit of jaded/blocking things in the last year and and am about to hit it a whole new level. even my career comeback i am doing also can tie in with that. this year is going to be sweet and super fun.
-this forum
-how great my ig looks
-my style
-high vibe dance music to get in shape to and induce feelings of excitement

[buttercup]

-all the resistances i ended up clearing last night.i had an old familiar paranoia/assuming wrong thing come to me and even with someone exactly from a few years ago that was reappearing in my vibration. it was so strange as all the dots connected and something came up the surface for me to clear and of course gave me a surge of motivation for new goals and where i want to be and go. from this,i gained a ton of confidence in myself,it's like i just suddenly after the breakdown came into a knowing of myself and realizing my value and how great i really am and that i rank high. after that,a belief i had trouble believing in that morning but couldnt figure out what was wrong with me that i couldn't even do step 1 of believe,well,I have more then a belief now,I have an inner knowing that came without effort and felt really good and this came shortly after being upset and having that happen.. i clearly had resistances on that topic blocking me from believing and later it came up with me discovering the hidden limiting belief and now i have been resistance free on that topic. this taught me that the key to believing and letting go,is the resistances which is the limiting beliefs. If we didn't have those,we'd believe and let go with ease,wouldnt we? it was a fascinating lesson for me that i now can apply for the future. believing and letting go should come naturally without effort,if it doesn't there's clean up work to do still. i've felt cleansed ever since,and lots of very hyper,high energy throughout ever since. i'm just super fascinated that i've now suddenly let go without effort and now when i had trouble believing in something so simple i now have a natural,easy knowing instead. it feels soooo good doing clean up work!
-scheduling a contortion class which is so exciting
-a nice warm shower
-getting out my bad feelings to best friend earlier. i'm glad i can now get things out without things getting as crazy with us
-soda
-someone i worked with posting a pic of me on her social media and tagging me and all the likes it got. made me feel very confident
-amazing pictures of me
-best friend seeming to like the work picture of me i showed him
-realizing perspective and how some of the things i am getting paranoid about with best friend is because everything is heightened since things are still not as stable with us so every little thing still makes me wonder that 6 months ago, i'd drop much quicker
-style and fashion
-feeling inspired last night to dance for ten minutes to high energy,high vibe music i love which was so needed.i haven't done cardio in so long. it put me in such a good mood and felt like i cleared so much blocked energy and made me sore even. i wonder if that played a part in triggering my limiting belief to come up later,since i know being in the vortex can trigger things to move forward
-eye massages. feel so good and make my eyesight feel better
-great,inspiring articles on how to make my life better
-water
-how cute the cat is and how content he seems
-mastering my goal of parking lots and knowing how to drive them before this month is over
-how much my vibe has shifted
-getting confirmation we can bring cat back tomorrow,though i really don't want to but i have to be fair since he isn't my cat.
-my eyeglasses
-how peaceful it feels when you just let the limiting beliefs currently making you crazy go
-sleep
-newfound goals an clarity this year and letting all the blocks i had to some goals go
-using jealousies as inspiration and to examine what in my life do i want perhaps
-all the dejavu lately,it's crazy and seeing it as only a good thing
-clothes
-comfort
-slippers
-how sculpted and tight my lower body is getting
-finding a book i had wanted but couldnt remember author name and finally seeing it mentioned on another forum
-feeling good in the moment
-finding out best friends mom did get me something from her trip. she had asked me if i wanted something then i never heard anything so that is cool
-paying more attention to my goals and desires,and things i like to do,even if it seems subtle or repressed.

[buttercup]

-my goals and all the resistances clearing and motivation i have. it's been making me feel very high energy and even hyper lately
-best friend staying here a little longer
-neighbors playing their music
-how sculpted and tight my lower body is getting. love it.
-dancing and cardio workouts
-vision board images i use for my phone now and on a loa site.
-how cute and innocent the cat is
-clean towels
-my strength
-food
-tuning into repressed desires so i can be more of myself and at peace
-my beauty
-being high status
-having more going for me then i realize at times
-forgiving myself for sleeping a lot last night and today. mood slinked down but that's ok. i maybe needed the sleep.
-all the things i'm going to try and do this week to get more done,and push forward and detach and heal
-forgiveness for myself
-my ambition
-all the bursts of happiness i've been feeling
-my ideas
-deciding to try biphasic sleep this week to see if it can benefit me and heal my insomnia
-how knowing i feel about my desires and in the vortex. i just know certain things are coming and will happen and it's becoming easier and easier to get in this state
-knowing i rank higher then i realize
-doing a nice session of speaking affirmations with mirror technique
-how great my skin looks
-doing my panic subliminals and being almost done with them. less then a week to go.
-enjoying the process of creation and manifesting again
-amazing inspiring loa videos that simplify it all
-how great it feels to know all that i desire is coming and is here! that inner knowing just feels so good and so natural.
-how great of a listener D is

[newfreedom]

• the smell of the kitchen hand wash (imperial leather - Summer sunrise (shea butter & honeysuckle))
• dawn
• my dishwasher
• my washing machine
• my propananol meds.
• my plastic garden chair (my computer chair)
• my pin-hole glasses
• my watch
• my feet (even though they are aching & sore)
• my home (bungalow)
• my garden
• wild garden birds
• the tall fir tree outside my garden
• the sky
• the clouds
• the cool air / breeze
• the sound of my fan
• my MP3 player, my new high quality earbuds earphones & deep sleep bi anural beats
• the sound of a cough clearing the chest of congestion (this one was such a relief to hear this morning during the ex,'s coughing bouts)
• this Gratitude List

[buttercup]

tuning into my feelings today and today i feel kind of weird,but don't know why. perhaps it's the spiritual work.
-the cat getting to stay here an extra day
-the cat seeming to feel better. so grateful.
-finding the cat in the cupboard after wondering where did he go. so cute and a great photo opportunity.
-trying a new style with my affirmations of making them simpler. it reminded me of some sort of shamanic meditation or as if i hypnotized myself. i found myself crying during even though i felt really good,it was weird and after i felt so calm.i could see myself being drawn to these style of things. it reminds me of the music i like. minimal thus powerful and really pulls you in and has an effect
-making a giant large custom list of affirmations based on trying cleaning work on resistances i had on one situation that had been bothering me.
-this awesome neville website that's really helped me make some final tweaks to getting things right and simplifying it all. the awesome idea of using "i remember" to reframe things which is perfect for me and of course the simplicity of feel it real
-transforming beliefs i had trouble believing in,to knowings
-happening to have extra quarters to dry clothes which i ended up needing
-observing my reality and starting to see how everything comes up from some inner belief.
-getting some wine today and how happy wine makes me
-having a nice little decorated cake with some wine
-sodas
-getting groceries done
-laying down and how good it feels sometimes to just do nothing
-manifesting some things from best friend based off the cleaning work i did. getting reassurances about where his money is going and that R was not with him during something and seeing a proof that.
-that affirmations work. although i agree with neville and some others that affirmations may not work for most or are difficult,i think they do work even if they aren't the most advanced method. loa can be far more simpler but affirmations certaintly are a start and i do believe they have some value. for me,the things that have more resistance,i just end up affirming or doing EFT to find the limiting belief which gives me affirmations to anchor the limiting belief clearing.i believe the repetiveness of affirmations makes them work and also doing techniques like i do of mirror technique or making it more hypnotic makes them work. of course,there is simpler ways then all this,but it does work.
-how good it feels when a room is clean
-appreciating the moment and the good that's come about
-gratitude
-that I have been seeings success with shifting my reality and affirmations and that all the stuck things that don't move,i just become more determined to see what is still blocking it.
-no tarot today. and,perhaps connected,i felt in a much better mood overall and had a stronger knowing of things and trust,peace,and flow. I did affirmations to clear the desire to do tarot and may tap on it.i told myself what is one thing i am doing to block so and so from manifesting? and,of course the number one thing was tarot. If I only could stop one thing and it would lead to it manifesting,what could it be? The tarot.
-feeling more bursts of positive mood these days. even though i do get down,i can feel i am training myself more and more to become positive
-yoga pants
-doing another high energy,cardio dance session. felt so good.i can feel it really clears stuck energy.
-asking questions and getting reassuring answer from best friend.
-knowing that even i get discouraged,and sad,that i will stay on this path to trying to master my reality. the work is worth it.
-that even despite some sadness and percieved setbacks at the time,that actually january had a lot of good.
-my beauty
-being a better"first job i do " then i realize sometimes
-being better then i think
-my conviction
-how much i've reframed my perspective on things that hurt thus far recently
-feeling young
-that best friend said he has three classes he is getting back
-that by taking my mind off the physical health issues lately,they've pretty much gone away.

[buttercup]

-inspiring creations
-surrender
-the really amazing miracle experience i had last night after i got upset about something,then had dejavu,then somehow surrendered and ended up having a very surreal subjective reality high vibe spiritual experience that brought me a lot of peace. ever since then i've still a lot more surrendered too and finally get it. i finally get how to surrender.
-reassurances from best friend when he came by and i showed him the pics,though by then i didn't really care anymore and felt like i had all the answers needed and him telling me he thinks the object looks totally different. plus,i had a thought and also seen another thing too kind of reinforcing that they likely aren't dating and just also still feel really confident about me,myself and that he really adored me no matter what.
-sodas
-clean clothes
-clean towels
-hearing that the cat is fine and also believing it too
-neville goddard teachings which i adore so much lately
-having a beautiful face
-my stomach looking nice and flat sculpted
-water
-feeling abundance and peace and presence for moments earlier today
-feeling overall more relaxed
-newfound inspirations of where i want to go,things i want,things i want to be,etc
-knowing i am changing even if i cant see it 100% on the external yet
-mercy for myself
-empathy
-my conviction
-sweaters
-feeling clean
-a new perspective on dejavu that i like and more things coming together for me on how things aren't predestiny but some things are set in motion ahead of time from your vortex of desires which makes things seem like destiny. things don't come instantly. and we don't really want them,to. which is why it's so important to be present and grateful in the moment,because even your life is in a hell place,there are likely some things at least that a few years ago you were desiring. this takes me back to the joy of creating and why gratitude is so amazing. we don't JUST create for the moment and we shouldn't get impatient because the moment isn't great or what we think we want,but instead be grateful for what is and be present and keep creating with neverending patience and trust in SELF and your SELF beliefs. things like this are amazing for me because they help me clear the conflicts in my mind that I know in my heart but had to piece together
-the feeling that spring is near
-getting that jar open after best friend left
-also,two other realizations that help me clear conflicts my heart knows but had trouble piecing together: Trust in yourself and trust in yourself beliefs IS trust in life because you are life,and you are God so perhaps instead of trying to trust in life if you have a broken trust in life,like me,perhaps just aim for trusting yourself again,and in that,the trust in life happens at the same time,because they ARE the one in the same. And,two was my realization last night about subjective reality but we aren't alone. I had this before,too. We do live in a subjective reality,but others are co-stars playing out are stories with us and are God,too helping us to reach that which we desire and to feel good and everyone else also has their own subjective reality,too and it's the same thing. Last night's bizarre spiritual experience confirmed this for me,which i really needed.
-dancing and cardio
-feeling beautiful and unique looking
-my dreams and things i desire that would be amazing
-feeling like it's safe to slow down