Originally Posted by
Pneumaphor
For some it's understandably hard to find Christ in christianity. Leaving christianity is usually a painful struggle, causing much guilt. Such a problem itself was prefigured in the new testament in Luke 18:12-14. A Law-Abiding Jew is thanking God for making him better than a sinner saying,
12 I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess.
13 And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner.
14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.
In other words, the real, self-accepting sinner was more justified [read: pleasing to God] than the rigid, artificial, some might say robotic law-abiding Jew.
Perhaps it is as Carl Jung explained so well; when we do not claim our darkness, we project it into our environment, making ourselves miserable. I would suggest first drawing a dark thin line between christianity and Jesus Christ, then, claiming the guilt as your own and asking Jesus, in private, to help you deal with it. Remember, Jesus preached to Jews and Gentiles as there were no christians at the time, nor while he walked this earth! Cut out the middle man. After all, Jesus is a "priest forever after the order of Melchizedek." - Psalm 110:4. If you remember your old testament, Priests were to give spiritual gifts themselves directly to the people, not through their followers!
I'm not trying to push you back to Christianity either, just to be clear. Jesus was officially a Jew anyway, but in reality so much more!
Bless You
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