Nursing babies

**susan** · 30th March 2013, 09:26 PM

Easter week-end and so much time to dedicate but feel so pulled to physical.Have done all things in garden needing doing, household things and through the night when wakening up have felt something is preventing me from raising energy. Want so much to add to experience but physical issues seem to be taking over even though they give me great pleasure , I am meditating for two hours late afternoon, bed by 10.00pm Nothing ..Nothing.Nothing...........

**susan** · 4th April 2013, 06:07 PM

Okay, it's only the first week in April but I've had absolutely nothing since my last recorded episode.Raising the NEW way every day and meditating but through the night nothing but mundane dreams not worth remembering. The strange thing is not a single energy rush up the body which was happening a lot. It's as if all my energy has disappeared.This has happened before.( not physical energy as I have loads of that) .Could the last 3 really exciting events( although one was very sad) have used up all my energy like a battery gets flat but needs to recharge? Is this what is meant when literature talks of the snake raising and then lies exhausted till the next event? OR has the spirit world or my higher self walked away for a bit deciding I've had enough for now? or maybe both.

**susan** · 7th April 2013, 12:26 PM

Strange dream.
I'm standing on the roof of a double decker bus with my arm spread out trying to balance. Others are doing the same but they are too far away to hold on to so I loose my balance and step on to a platform. A trainer is there telling me I have to try again and that I cann't have one of the others to hold onto because he will be I front of me .
Next we are all in a house but the windows are closed and curtains closed. We cann't open them because there is a storm outside.The storm ends and we all go outside but we are very wary,being cautious.We seem to know that strange things might happen.( It's like one of these futuristic films that are meant to frighten you) A mushroom pops up from the ground causing us concern but it gets taller and taller and I put my ear to it and it sings with a beautiful soft quiet voice. This is for teaching small children geography.( we just seemed to know) We now go around the corner where there is a fighting scene where mobs are on the street with guns. We I think just seem to watch,I cann't remember getting involved but a load of police arrive riding on strange 3 wheeler bikes. We run and find ourselves back in the house.
I 'm now upstairs in the bedroom and open the curtains. The house is travelling upwards in the clouds,eventually the clouds are underneath us when I see a clear sky with a lovely full moon.
The moon gets brighter and brighter and brighter when I'm just starting to think its going to start hurting my eyes when I wake up.
Recalled the dream with full detail but too early to get up so must have dozes off again and woke to remembering someone is knocking on the front door( my own house). The post man is standing waving a package which is for me. Woke up.

This has been such a different adventure, no babies ,no eggs, no family members, no pregnancy.
Would appreciate any analysis on this one if anyone has any thoughts.
Just to set the scene, I don't have any personal issues, I didn't watch anything on telly to give me these thoughts.
My only disappointment was that I wasn't feeling any energy symptoms and hadn't had anything meaningful for the last few nights as my previous posts suggested. Felt a bit deserted.

**susan** · 8th April 2013, 03:55 PM

Bit of humour followed be 2 OBEs.
Have been pondering over the idea of getting my hair cut shorter and went to bed having been discussing it.
Woke up laughing. A girl is standing with a big mop of black hair ( mine is red) looking like the worst haircut imaginable when she says to another person" I want your advice, should I get it cut" The next image her hair has grown right over her eyes and is like a pudding bowl cut,all you can see of her face is her lips. The other person says " We'll if you want my opinion" and she parts the fringe to show the eyes.
I woke up laughing at the image and was pondering over the fact that she was shown with such funny hair and why ? When I thought I wonder what styles I could go for when 2 different hairstyles immediately flashed up in my vision. I didn't recognise the face,I also have to say that sadly I don't think I would go for either of the cuts as nice as they were they were a bit too short for me.
About 30 minutes later just got to the mind awake body asleep stage when I noticed movement within the inner eyelids. Thinking I might be going to see something I could now hear the noise associated with an OBE but it was a lot quieter this time and no vibrations but I felt myself gently raise up. Vision wasn't good ,the only 2 colours were grey and white but I was going high up and found myself at the ceiling of a very high large area almost like the size of a plane hanger ( I think I've been there before) I wasn't aware of having a body and was pleased at this but as I went passed a light I could feel it touch my arm. This amused me that I couldn't see my body but could feel the light touch me so I went back for a double take and did the same again.I thought about keeping my physical eyes closed so unfortunately this ended the OBE.
Stayed still ,very relaxed,cleared mind,looked into eyelids and within minutes I'm floating up again, same noise but this time into space with stars in the distance. I just floated but the stars weren't getting much clearer and I just came back to body.
Annoyed With myself all day because I know what I'm doing wrong. I'm just waiting to see where I go and not putting any clear intention into it.
I should have taken charge and thought of where I wanted to go. ( on the other hand I'm not that interested in the RTZ when there's the astral to explore so next time will have to remember to keep moving.

**susan** · 14th April 2013, 12:01 PM

Woke up frightened with a big explosion in my head and the sound of gunfire so loud it felt as if it was in my head.
Recalled dream straight away ( I know I've posted about a brow centre strobe followed by explosion in my head before, but this one was connected to a dream the other was whilst in light trance with no dream .
In my father's house sleeping when sister comes in to wake me up to give me a present of two boxes of Black Magic chocolates.She told me I should have guessed it would be these..
I seemed to remember rushing out of the house with others excited as if we were on some mission flying planes and then came back home having done a good job.I'm eating a packed lunch but my boiled egg is too hot to eat.
This is when the gunfire started. The house is near the coast and enemy aircraft are above. I'm kneeling on the floor looking out of the window and can see the colour so clear of the shots in the sky,I feel frightened , a bomb has just been dropped close by and I'm waiting to see if it is going to hit,waiting to see the explosion.
Woke up. It was just a dream but I felt the fear, the gunfire was so real in sound and vivid in colour, the explosion was inside my head. The feeling of fear disappeared as soon as I woke up.( Not like being shown the photograph posted above where I felt sad all day)
Just to note here that I have not been doing any brow centre work.
After pondering over this I went back to sleep and had another dream.
I 'm standing on the doorstep with a lot of other people crowding around talking,( got the feeling everything was over now)
A little girl wearing a long nightdress almost to her ankles comes up to me and puts her arms up to me. she wants me to pick her up.I do and notice that her two hands are slightly deformed.I feel how light she is to hold,it takes no effort in fact there is no weight to her.I remember feeling how warm and cozy her nightdress feels against me.
She turns her head and lookers in the distance and says...." Me mummy's gone looking for you because they've taken me heart out".

I'm really struggling with this one,not sure what to interpret but I do know I have a bit of a tension headache but not enough to take a tablet for.

**susan** · 16th April 2013, 07:30 PM

Ended up having to take a tablet for the head. Thinking back to the end of the last dream where the heart was taken out.
I'm not good at interpreting but I have noticed that in the last few days since all my energy surges up the body have diminished, I have done a lot of energy raising the NEWS way, but have failed to bring love into my meditation.
I've kind of slapped on the brush, squeezed out the sponge, batted the ball with force ,and then when settling into meditation clearing the mind and looking into brow area.
And yes I've had results like OBEs but that doesn't mean I'm on track. I've realised that I was so intent to bring energy back up to speed that I forgot what the fundamental essence of evolving needs. LOVE.
What a difference it made this pm ,bringing in love during meditation.
Advice to anyone who reads this..( except of course the mods and admins and long term members and those in the know,including within that group Eyeoneblack ( I still have your tail by the shredder but you deserve it back now,will send in post) )
NEW to raise energy but must be followed by meditation involving the key element "LOVE"

**susan** · 17th April 2013, 01:25 PM

This morning woke up to a symbol of a flame getting brighter and the memory of flowers everywhere in the kitchen.
Recalled dream.
I was watching someone outside talking to someone else when a door opened and another person vomited all over the floor and all over the person I had been watching. ( in my dream this person looked like Simon Cowell) .He shouts to the person" what's the matter with you are you on drugs or what"? I go to get a mop to wipe it up when I find someone else has already cleaned up. They bring Simon in but he has injuries over his body. As they lay him down he says "It's okay,I'll soon be back to normal" Meaning he'll pay for the repair.

For the record I've just taken out private health
Next I wander into a room where a girl is taking video shots but I notice that she is pretty but her nails are dreadful.In fact really scruffy.
I am now waiting for two friends who have been away a long time. I'm in my grand- parents house.I keep looking out the window then go into the kitchen to wash my hands. I cann't move for flowers. They are all over the floor,the bench, the windowsill and even in the sink. I'm a little annoyed because I cann't was my hands. One friend arrives home into the kitchen and is exited. She tells me that she is preparing for a really big party at Christmas and these flowers are for then. I wonder where she will store them till then. Woke up to the flame and flowers.
An edit 13 July 2014
At the time I thought I might have cancer but couldn't post here incase member of family read this. So now I feel this was them letting me know everything would be okay. But at the time I didn't get it.

**susan** · 21st April 2013, 11:26 AM

2 short dreams only, not sure if worth posting but ..... Here goes.

I'm travelling with a group of friends(I wouldn't recognise them in real life. I just knew they were friends.)
I felt this place we were passing through was a community of people all living together and further along was another community. The strange thing is that there was nothing between the two communities, no land, no sea, just empty space. We were on the street where everyone was out having fun. A group of people were putting on a show of Greek dancing and they were really good at it. Someone comes up behind me and gives me a massive ice cream with a big chunk of chocolate on top.I just go to eat it when the wind blows the chocolate off. They laugh,I go to eat the ice cream,got to my mouth. I wake up. DRAT!

2nd dream. I'm standing by a stall with items on it for sale when someone comes and picks up a doll and walks away with it. I'm wondering why he didn't pay for it when he acknowledges to my husband that it was only on loan.
I'm now in a busy place and I'm going to miss my bus home. I go down different streets,see people, drat forgotten something,need to go back to find it. Start again but I'm going to be late for the bus, forgotten something else, got to go back again.
Some friends ask me if I want them to show me to the bus station. I walk with them down to the bottom of one street and the bus stop is there .I realised I needn't get a bus they had taken me home.( I remember this was a village by the sea I lived in as a child and at the bottom of the village if you looked up the street with the sea behind you , two roads ran parallel , meeting at the bottom. )
I had been trying the other route .
Delighted at being home and it was Sunday decided to but a newspaper and sunbathe on the beach.
Woke up.. Fat chance of that, but it was nice to wake up to feeling happy so I'm going to have a lazy day today.

**susan** · 21st April 2013, 09:44 PM

Just a quick re-cap for my own benefit.
Today had a fairly easy Sunday but when meditating in afternoon I fell asleep quickly for about 2 hours. This is unlike me because usually my problem is silencing the mind. I've previously had the dream suggesting I was low on energy ( sugar and lucozade) which resulted in me needing to sleep the next day.
This morning suggested I should have a lazy day ( sunbathing) and I fall asleep in the afternoon.
Also, dreams recently are involving previous childhood homes.

**susan** · 24th April 2013, 06:16 PM

Not sure but I may have had a hint of some more info coming in the form of a picture or hologram.
Last night I dreamt I was on a doorstep and a girl answered the door but her mummy was too busy to come to the door so the little girl passed on the message from her mummy "Would I just bring the picture with me tomorrow when we meet up?"
Of course this may just be wishful thinking on my part.