Quote Originally Posted by susan View Post
No no IA you didn't cause any hurt at all. I was a bit pushed for time and needed time to think about this one.
Absolutly right about Envy and Pity. I was envious of HB that night because I have withdrawn pleasures from my life and he still has them. I know for a fact that wine would send me dizzy now. When I cook meat for him from what used to smell gorgeous now smells like rotted meat for the bin. ( in fact I left a steak out for him last night for coming home from work and was concerned incase it was off and he ended with food poisoning but he seems fine .) Now there's the fish.

Last year or the year before I had a lovely short dream almost like a child's cartoon where it was suggesting I should be shown what the fishermen are doing to the fish our friends out to sea. It also had me putting on realy heavy red lipstick.( ingredients to lipstick) .I realised immediatly what the meaning here was and laughed it off as NO WAY! Not ready to give up fish.

The time I wrote on my I pad with my eyes closed.....veg vegan change go now ....( or something like that) Absolutly no way am I going vegan. How many times have I written NO WAY! And then months later it starts up again till I say OKAY!

I know without doubt the way I am being gently directed but I am battling with myself. There are those that argue the moral side to this , the killing , then there is the fact that mystical experiences are experienced also by those who drink ,take drugs and are not vegetarian.

So this is my battle with myself. I know I must go with my guidance and gut feeling but the transition isn't easy. I feel a little embarrassed when saying I've given up fish now. What a hypocrite having eaten this all my life.
Maybe this was the chariots and horses symbolism...strength, power, battle, don't know.
Do you have any thoughts on horses and chariots in an arena IA?
Hi Susan,
Thank´s for telling me and to your question about horses and chariots does give me a feeling of...show off....

I can tell you something about my life...I have gone through just as you...food taken away by giving me a feeling of disgust against things...and I did also stop eating one thing after another and I ended up to have a life threatening deficiency disease....the lesson for me was...to learn to know my body...what it needs to thrive and be the best....to host me so I can do what I came here to do....learn and develop.

So I can not be vegan because my body needs real fish and chicken meat...my body can not process and survive otherwise.

I was also shown that it is real energy and it is why these animals do not have the consciousness yet developed as in us....I was shown also that I have bean eaten several times before I was developed enough my consciousness to inhabit a human body.

So how true this is for you I do not know...but it is very true to me.

Love
ia